(entering) Look, I really need some help, okay? Why? Why did I have to speak in a British accent?! What do I do?

Why don’t you phase it out? Yeah, fade the accent out and people will think you’re, y’know, that you’re adjusting to life in America.


No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big    massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!

And she wants to go hunting, too!!

Phoebe, come on, I don't wanna waste it! It would be like throwing    away a hundred bucks!

, ok? It's about... it's    about corporate greed destroying our hearts and leaving us... the hollow shells.

I don't care about any of that!!

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Are you scared?

No! All right, who-who makes up the questions?


Oh my God! You’re getting a massage! You never let me massage you!!


Are you serious?! Chandler, we ate an entire cheesecake two days ago and you want more?

Well I’ve forgotten what it tastes like okay?!

It was cheesecake. It was fine. It had a buttery, crumbly, graham cracker crust, with a very rich yet light, cream cheese filling… (Pause) Wow! My whole mouth just filled with saliva!

are just hungry! We have not had lunch! We are just light-headed! So let us go out and have lunch and forget about the cheesecake.


Phoebe, do you want to go see a movie after dinner tonight?

Oh we can't, we already have plans.


The young hot ball and chain.

(checking her watch) Op! We gotta go! (The girls stand up.)

We’re gonna pick up the wedding dress then we’re gonna have lunch with mom. (Joey stands up.)

monica addressed joey, not chandler (ground truth)


Hey, isn’t weird to think about how next year at this time they’ll be a little baby at the table? (Chandler turns around in horror.) (Seeing him) Rachel’s! But good to know where you’re at!

I have no idea.


That's right. You're husband's home. So, now the sex can stop.

What are you saying?


Oh, would you let it go already?! You’re fine!

Hey! So, did you quit?


So tell me, what are Joey Tribbiani’s end of the night moves?

Ah, well, if I want the girl to kiss me, first thing I do is make my lips  look irresistible.


(into receiver)Hello? Hey Charlie, what do you know?


Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!

(To Rachel) Well look, hey, it's all your fault!


Was that story over?


(while Rachel is finishing her rant) Okay! Okay! Okay! It’s okay. (Rachel stops.) It’s okay. Hey, it’s too weird for you, I won’t see her again.

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Really? What do you do? You just sit in there stewing in your own filth.


What thing? What is this thing?

Oh my God!

Ross, why didn’t you tell me that?

Eh, ‘cause I knew that if I told you, you’d make me go, and I knew you needed someone to be with you tonight. Come on. Come on.

I cannot believe you.


No, I don’t want to tell you.

More embarrassing than shiny raspberry lip balm?! (Rachel just looks at  him.) I didn’t say raspberry before did I? All right just-just tell me Rach, just  tell me!

(laughs) Okay. All right, stand up. (They do so.) Well, when we’re  at the door, I lightly press my lips against his, and then move into his body just for a  second, and then I make this sound, "Hmmm." Okay, I know it doesn’t sound  like anything, but I swear it works.


(To Joey) I can’t believe that you yelled at my boss! I’m-I’m gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!


Hey! I’m sorry! That—(sees that Joey is about to leave) where are you going?

I don’t know. I might stay there for a few days while I look for an apartment.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Ah. Joey you’re-you’re having lunch with my mom?

joey was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


(she hurries after him) Wait, we still have time to talk and they’re-they're not even in the car yet! (She takes a quick look down the street.) Oh look, there they go, okay. (She hurries in, too)


We’ll try to keep it down.

Phoebe, could you do me a favour? Could you try this on? I just wanna makesure it fits.

Ooh, my first birthday present... (delightedly examining the cardigan inher lap) ..oh, this is really...

Oh, no no no. It’s for Ursula. I just figured, you know, size-wise.

Ohhh... Sure, yeah... (disgustedly dropping the cardigan back into the bag)..okay, it fits.


(entering) Hey! Ross and I were looking for you! What are we all doing in  here? (Looks at Chandler) Oh, my! (Covers the spot where Joey wants bubbles to be  replaced.)

(entering) Well hey! What’s going on? Ooh, cool boat—(Sees why the  boat’s there)—Oh, no. (Averts his eyes by looking around the room) (To Rachel)  Hey, did you, did you tell them?

No, I was waiting for you!


I’m just saying it’s been a really long time for you. I mean, women have needs. Do it, get yours!

Oh I-I don’t know about that. No, I think that if the two of you had sex the-the-the repercussions would be catastrophic.

All right, let’s be practical, if Ross isn’t willing to do it, he’s not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow Chandler—Chandler is good!

monica addressed ross, not phoebe (ground truth)


I am pretty wisdomous.

So... what do you say?

Are you kidding? Phoebe, I would be honored. (they hug)

phoebe was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


(on tape) Yeah. (Pause) Anyway umm, it probably worked out for the best.

And in about five seconds you’re gonna see why.

(on tape) Ross did I ever tell you about the time that I went backpacking through Western Europe?

Now I’m so happy.

What are you talking about?!


Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, let’s talk about it!! How was she?

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


I don’t want him to tell this story for years.

Oh, but he will. He still tells the story how Monica tried to escape from fat camp.

monica was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Ok, ok, ok. Ooh, hey 'new doc on the block, Days of Our Lives' Joey Tribbiani.' Ooh, cool picture.

Ooh, I look good.

Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'


Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you must end it now!

Oh, come on! It’s not like this is an everyday occurrence for me! I mean usually I’m pretty much just in there by myself.


(doing a little dance) Hey Ross, look what I've got going here.

ross was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


He's a brilliant diagnostician!

Diagnostician or boo-boo fixer?


Yeah, well, I only have twenty minutes until Ethan, so, y'know.. (He starts to raid the fridge.)


A new grocery store. The universe said I was going to meet a nice guy and that’s what they gave me? (Looks up) When I get up there I’m going to kick some ass.

Don’t worry Phoebe, you’re gonna meet someone. If I can meet a great guy, so can you.

phoebe was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Hey Joey, what ‘cha doing?

joey was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


We wanted to kiss at midnight, but nobody else is going to so y'know…


But equally real!


Ohh, get these things out of me!

Breathe! Breathe! Breathe throw the pain.


So, uh, why did you have to turn it down?


No, I'm sorry.

Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay withher and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to getmarried, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."

rachel addressed ross, not monica (ground truth)


You have to!

No way! Look, Halloween is so stupid! Dressing up, pretending to be someone you’re not…


I just—I thought you guys were doing it, I didn't know you were in love!

So that's it! It's over! Everybody knows!


Hey, so did everything go all right with the annulment?

Oh, yeah, no problems. It’s all taken care of.

Ross, thank you. Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie?

Oh yeah, why not?

Okay, umm, I’m gonna get my sweater. (Walks away.)


Wow. Joey, (sarcastically) how do you do it?

I can’t tell you that, no.

He took up the carpet, and now you can hear everything.


Ohh, great! Oh hey, listen Ross, thanks for being so cool about this.

No, that’s all right.

No, it’s not. I mean you-you made me your best man and I totally let you down!


I like them a lot.


Well, you tell a lot of jokes!

Look, Chandler, it’s my joke. But, hey, if it makes you feel any better they don’t print the name, so it doesn’t really matter who gets credit, right?

ross addressed chandler, not monica (ground truth)


Monica, I'm tellin' you, this guy is perfect for you.

Forget it. Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet.

Come on. This guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's... brother. He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job. Me, I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor, but Bob is...

(looking out window) Oh, god help us.


Y’know, I knew something like this was going to happen. (He starts to take off his pants, revealing that he is still wearing his sweat pants.)

What are you doing?! Chandler! You can’t just go back a phase!

chandler was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


So Ross, how was your date the other night? Did you tell her about the magical ride that starts with the flush of every toilet?


Well, I try to y'know, squeeze things. (Phoebe giggles uncontrollably.) Are you okay?

Well, if you really wanna know, I'm—Oh! I can't tell you this.


Skidmark’s still got a way with the ladies.

Hi! I just want to apologize. I’m really sorry I was a baby.

That’s ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once. (Rachel looks at her.) Oh, you mean today.

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


(looking at the page) 717? (to Carol) Where’s 717? (He gets up to return the page, Carol starts to take the last of the food into the kitchen, but Ross grabs the last piece.) Hey, you’ve have more of these for Susan right?

No. But it’s okay, I’ll just put out pickles or something.


OK, I'm officially unpacked. Thanks for helping me man. (Turns around and sees that Joey isn't there.) Joe? (Hears giggling coming from a box) Well, I guess Joey went home. Oh and look, there's still one box that I have to unpack. (Hears the giggling again)

Boy, it was so hard not to laugh, I tell ya. Hey, hey, the place looks great!

Yeah, not bad right? You know what, Monica’s gonna be working late, so I'm gonna make this place spotless. You know what else I'm gonna do, know what else I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go downstairs, I'm gonna get her some flowers. Now who wouldn't wanna live with me?

(raises his hand) I don't! No, I wanna live with the super-hot Australian dancer.


Wow! Your lip went bald. (Richard pays the clerk) Hey, thanks.

So, you look great.


All right fine! But I’m only doing this for you!

Thank you. All right, now who else do you want to invite?

Ah, no-no-no just Ross. Ross and Joey is embarrassing enough.

Uh actually, sorry I can’t even make it. I’m seeing Mona again tonight.


Wow Pheebs, you speak Italian?

I guess so. (See, the brief possession didn't affect her at all, like we could really tell.)

(She enters and hands Phoebe the earring) Here you go. Thank you!

phoebe was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


You gonna tell her?


(to Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe) Did you hear that? I only get one extra ticket to my premiere. So some how I have to pick between you three and Ross.

monica was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


All right, ready?

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Wait a minute, you got Ross Gellar and guest?! I wasn’t invited and you got "and guest?!"

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, gosh, it's hot in here.


I don’t know, I don’t know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.


(turning all the way around, and still not facing Chandler) Yeah, you are! (Starts dancing.) I scared you!

(laughing) You did look like an idiot.

Hey, I wasn't the only one who looked like an idiot. All right? Remember when Ross tried to say, "Butternut squash?" And it came out, "Squatternut buash?"

joey addressed ross, not chandler (ground truth)


You set her up?!

Joey what-what were you thinking?!

Well, I was thinking that it’d probably be okay because Ross hasn’t gone out with Rachel in five years!

Joey, I’m not worried about her! I’m worried about my baby! Whoever she dates my baby dates! Now-now where is this (makes the quote-marks sign) actor taking them?


I don't get it. What do you see in this guy, anyway?

Well... he happens to be a very nice... guy....

Rachel, come on. Give us a chance.

Ross, it's too hard.


And she's just so sexy and funny and has the cutest little…

Okay, y'know what? We don't need her measurements.

(looking through the pizzas) Okay pepperoni, pepperoni, pepperoni, okay Ross, I know she's pretty and you love her, but is she stupid?! She forgot my vegetarian!

This is perfect! She'll have to come back here with your pizza, and when she does, I'll turn on the Charm-O-Ross. Oh I'm so glad you don't eat meat.


I thought you were going out with Elizabeth.

Yeah, I was but uh, she was a little busy with a water balloon fight.

Oh Ross, sometimes grown-ups have commitments they just can’t get out of!


Yeah, right Monica. I'm so sorry.

(suddenly starts issuing him out) Ah, it's an honest mistake. It could    happen to anyone. All right, see ya.


(entering) Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!

(looking at the table) Excuse me ladies. (To Phoebe) I’m sorry?

My massage client, Arthur? His daughter called and said that some guy that worked for me gave him a really weird massage this afternoon.

(incredulous) I gave him an extremely professional massage!

He said you poked at him with wooden spoons.


So how many more do you have tomorrow?

Two. This photographer, who seemed really dull. And this actor guy, who I’m not sure about, because when he called and I answered the phone ‘Chandler Bing,’ he said ‘Whoa-whoa, short message.’


Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Y’know, I-I-I said some really bad stuff about her, but y’know Rachel has some good qualities that make her a good roommate. She gets tons of catalogs and umm, she’ll fold down the pages of the things she thinks that I’d like.

rachel was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Hey! That was a practical purchase! I needed that car for transportation! Okay? I-I have a child!

How hot do I look in this, huh?!

Ross, a sports car? Wouldn’t it have been cheaper to just stuff a sock down there?

been into cars.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Are you scared?

No! All right, who-who makes up the questions?

Ross will do it.


Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuff right after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear?


I believe in tall, handsome strangers who hit on my wife!

They’re just talking, and y’know what? Just because I think they’re soul mates doesn’t mean anything’s gonna happen.


Rachel, you are packed though right, I mean please tell me that you’re packed.


Honey! Do you know that none of that stuff came from me?! I mean I never said I wanted to have babies and get married right now!


(running and banging on Chandler’s door) The stripper stole the ring!! The stripper stole the ring!! Chandler! Chandler, get up! Get up! The stripper stole the ring!

Ugh. Just a sec, give me a minute to wake up for this—Ah-ha-ha!! You lost the ring! You’re the worst best man ever!

Dude, this isn’t funny! What am I gonna do?! I go to bed last night, everything’s cool! I wake up this morning, the stripper’s gone and the ring is gone!

You slept with the stripper?


Sure. By the way, there's a difference between being obsessive and. . .

Ross, the heat!

Fine, OK! Heat, heat, heat, and I'm the obsessive one. [goes to the radiator and starts turning the knob] OK, this way is on, so this is. . . [breaks off the knob] off.

No, no, I was turnin' the knob and, and. . . here it is.

Well put it back.

It uhh, it won't go back.

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh my God! I bet that’s him. My digital fairy tale is about to begin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh (In a sexy voice) Hello? Or should I be (Happily) Hi! It’s Rach… (Phoebe knocks the phone out of Rachel’s hand, catches it, and answers it.) Would you stop doing that?!


Yes! I’d love to! Have her come by the office.

Great! Thanks! You’re gonna love her so much. And—Oh, she’s the smartest of all the Tribbiani children. Hey, y’know the S.A.T’s?

Hey Ross! Doesn’t Ben go to the Smithfield Day School?

Fine! No more dinosaur stuff! Can I talk about fossils? (Joey is about to sit down and hears this so instead he groans and exits.)


(entering) Phoebe? (Phoebe comes back into the living room) Oh, Phoebe, I'm so sorry. Have you been here long?

(saddened) It's okay. What the hell took you so long?


What are these, like famous chickens?

Hey, sorry I'm late. Congratulations, Mon. (to Ross) I'm not sorry I'm late.How incredible was my afternoon with Jade?

Well, pretty incredible according to the message she left you on my machine. Hey,Chandler, why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine?

chandler was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Wow, hello! You look great!

Thank you! I know, though.


What? Hey wait a minute! Phoebe, how do you even know who the father is?

I may play the fool at times, but I’m a little more than a pretty blond girl with an ass that won’t quit. (She takes the sweater out of her purse.) I believe this belongs to the father of your baby.

Oh God… Oh, he’s in there right now?

Uh-huh. Now you can turn around or you can go in there and rip the Band-Aid off. What to you want to do?


You told me you hate massages!

let Phoebe in.

phoebe was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Because of the weekend, we had a fight.

Chandler that's crazy! If you give up every time you'd have a fight with someone you'd never be with anyone longer than—Ohhh! (They both realize something there.)

So, this isn't over?

(laughs) You are so cute! No. No, it was a fight. You deal with it and move on! It's nothing to freak out about.


No way!  I've been going to the guy for 12 years.

Oh come on!  He said he was going to do my inseam, and he ran his hand up my leg, and then, there was definite...

That's how they do pants!  Ross, will you tell him? Isn't that how they measure pants?


Why would I eat my own arm?

Well you wouldn't, but we own the paper, we can print whatever we want.

You know what, Ross? I'm gonna throw in 50 bucks for you.

You don't have to do that, I'll pay for myself. But just the fact that you want me to have fun with you guys - that's so sweet! Come here (they kiss and hug)


Why the hell didn't you tell me!

I'm sorry. What was I supposed to do stand up and shout 'Hey, Rachel, your butt is showing!'

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Hey! How’d your date go with Jake?

Oh, great! We couldn’t keep our eyes off each other all night and then every once and a while y’know, he’d kinda lean over and stroke my hair and touch my neck. (Does that to Monica.)

Okay, stop it Phoebe, you’re getting me all tingly.

(laughs) All I could think of was y’know, "Is he gonna kiss me? Is he gonna kiss me?"


of the responsibility. I mean, this is every guy's fantasy!


For the ride.

Yeah, like in a cab...


Oh that's not bad, Pheebs?

Oh, I got tired of naming states. So I decided to list the types of celery, and I have one regular celery.

Okay, so Rachel's got 48 and Phoebe has the lead in…vegetables, Joey?

chandler addressed joey, not phoebe (ground truth)


obviously, I just—I misspoke. It's okay.

okay, I mean as long as you know that Chandler and I are also very hot and fiery, just as hot as you! I mean our flame, whew, is on fire!


I can't believe we are at a real college party! (Rachel laughs excitedly) I have to pee so bad!

I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! (They spot Chandler)

Look, there's Chandler. You knew, that stupid friend of Ross'. Said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!

It... You can so totally tell.


Oh, want a good name, go with Joey. Joey’s your pal. Joey’s your buddy. "Where is everybody?" "Well, they’re hanging out with Joey."

Hey, y’know what, if you’re gonna do that, if you’re gonna name him Joey, you should name him Chandler. (Phoebe doesn’t think so.) Oh, come on! Chandler’s funny, sophisticated, and he’s very loveable, once you get to know him.

joey was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Oh stop it. Joey already told me.

Hey, don't look at me. This is Ross's thing.

No, you are not. We tell you stuff.


But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!

Look, you guys don't need me here taking up your space.

Well, we got plenty of space! There-there's still some over there (Points to where the window is but sees that there isn't any space there and points towards his door.) by-by that speaker. Please, just stay!

Are you guys sure about this?


Yeah, we know, but there's a baby suckin' on it.


How’d the lecture go?

It went great! And I didn’t need any jokes or naked chicks either!

Wow, that’s great Ross, I’m sorry we weren’t more supportive before.

rachel addressed ross, not monica (ground truth)


Ok, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's not funny anymore.

Hey, Monica, I got a question. I don't see any tater tots.

That's not a question.

But my mom always makes them. It's like a tradition. You get a little piece of turkey on your fork, a little cranberry sauce, and a tot! It's bad enough I can't be with my family because of my disease.


You're on in 5 Ms. Minnelli.

(on the phone) No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. (Listens) No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. (Hangs up.)


Well, my secretary is gonna be out for a couple of weeks. She is having one of her boobs redused. (Ross looks at her.) It's a whole big boob story.

ross was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


So, how would you like to have a baby that's half yours and half his!


Hey, honey! What’s the matter? (Monica shows her, her hat.) Fine, I was just trying to be nice! Whoa!

I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and they had to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. (Joey laughs and Monica glares at him.)

I mean they’re trying to do everything they can to make me quit, and if there were any other job, I would. But this is something I’ve been waiting for my whole life.

Well, wait a minute, you’re the boss! Why don’t you just yell at them? Or, fire them?

I would love too, but I can’t! I mean I just can’t, you know that I’m not good at confrontation.


Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!


Wait! Wait! Wait! Y'know what? Just stay. Please? It uh… It would really mean a lot to me if you stayed.


Chandler, you're not gonna die alone.

Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.

If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook,like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with aSnake, y=know. Crazy Snake Man. And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids willwalk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'llshout!


No it’s not! You want it, you’re gonna have to win it!

All right, so are we not having dinner at all?

Come on Phoebe, let’s go! Come on, it’s time to get serious, huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.

monica addressed joey, not rachel (ground truth)


Okay, you guys spend waaaay too much time together. (Goes back inside and shuts the door)

Okay, I'm scum, I'm scum.

Ross, how could you let this happen?

I don't know, God, I... well, it's not like she's a regular mom, y'know? She's, she's sexy, she's...


Apparently, there’s like a million guys out there that can play Mac, and there’s only this one robot and this one guy who controls it! I didn’t know he could get me fired! What am I going to do?


Nah, I’m too depressed to eat. I’ll probably eat in like 5 minutes. So I guess I’ll just fly home with you guys, what time’s your flight?

What about my cab?

No, Joey! You borrowed my cab; you have to drive it back.

I don’t want to drive all the way back by myself, I get so lonely. (Gets an idea.) Oh—ooh! How about you come with me?

I don’t know, it’s such a long trip.

It’ll be great! We-we could talk, and play games! Huh? This could be our chance to like renew our friendship.

Are you asking me to have a frenaissance?


And you know, I have a massage client soon.

You guys, just please.. a little bit longer. I promise, Rachel will be    back with the cake any minute. Monica, remember.. the frosting? huh?

ross addressed monica, not phoebe (ground truth)


Well, legend has it Joey, that... she comes alive    when you're asleep.

joey was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Oh my God! How long has she been crying?

About a week and a half.

Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so I’m just gonna go. (She gets up and Rachel looks at her, upset, and Monica just stares.) No! Really? Misery really does love company. All right! (She sits back down.)

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Sleeping with somebody new, anxiety, panic, and I’m afraid even more sweating.

Even with me?

I was dangerously dehydrated during the first six months of our relationship. (Monica laughs.) Look, for me the rush is knowing that we are gonna be together for the rest of our lives.

Come here! Come here! (They hug.) Sweetie you don’t have to worry. No, besides y’know what? I’m gonna have a lot of new things with you. The first time we buy a house. Our first kid. Our first grandkid…


Come here to me. No-no, you come here to me.

(entering) Hey Ross! I brought reinforcements.

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


No, no, you can get one yourself. It’ll be on the house! Y'know what are big sisters for?

No, no, no, I wouldn’t do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, I’ll get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?


(to Joey) I wasn’t doing anything. (Joey starts angrily throwing his stuff down.) Uh-oh, what did she do now?

Just because she went to Yale drama, she thinks she’s like the greatest actress since, since, sliced bread!

Ah, Sliced Bread, a wonderful Lady MacBeth.

God, I just, I hate her! I hate her!! With her, ‘Oh, I’m so talented.’ and ‘Oh, I’m so pretty,’ and ‘Ooh, I smell so good.’

I think somebody has a crush on somebody.


Well, this is the last box of your clothes. I’m just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"

Funny, because I was just gonna go across the hall and write that on Chandler.

Hey you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.

phoebe addressed rachel, not monica (ground truth)


Really?! Oh that’s so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon, if you touch my guitar again I’ll have to pound on you for a little bit.

I’ll get everybody else (Does so), finally we can start celebrating my—(She gasps and is stopped by the sight of Ross and Rachel making out in the hall.) I’m sorry, uh apparently I’ve opened the door to the past.

monica addressed ross, not phoebe (ground truth)


Whoa-whoa, Treeger made you cry?


Well lets see. Maybe he knows where Ross is. (They walk towards Chandler) Hey, how's it going (tries to look as un-interested in him as possible - checking out her nails).

Listen Adrienne, you can't tell Chandler about this.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


You have to!


What's it sound like? It's a guy with my identical hands! It was incredible! Chandler, the dealer's hands were exactly like me! It-it was like looking at my hands in a mirror!

Are you sure you weren't (pause) looking at your hands in a mirror?

Don’t you see what this means?! I can forget about that stupid movie. I'm gonna be a millionaire!

Look, I don't have it all worked out yet, but it's gotta mean big money! Come on! Identical hands!


Ah, now Rach, these ah, these little women.

How little are they? I mean, are they like scary little?

Um, Chandler, Ross, this is Robert.

(to Robert) So ah, isn’t a bit cold out for shorts?


You're on in 5 Ms. Minnelli.

(on the phone) No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. (Listens) No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. (Hangs up.)

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh, like you don’t already have everything.

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Monica, wake up. Monica.

No. Big deal, so you have a side of the bed, everybody has a side of the bed.

richard did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh, let me see! (grabs picture) Oh, God, is he just the sweetest thing? You must just want to kiss him all over!

(quietly) That would be nice.

Nothing, just a little extra air in my mouth. Pffft. Pffffffft. (walks over to where Joey is seated)

Hey, Chan, can you help me out here? I promise I'll pay you back.

Oh, yeah, right, OK... inlcuding the waffles last week, you now owe me... 17 jillion dollars.


(to Ross) Don’t try to sway her. (To Monica) (Softly) I’m your only chance to have a baby. Okay, let’s go.

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Hey! Ooh, wow that jacket looks great on you!


Chandler, aren’t you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?

No, I have a great idea for a present for her.


bad massages. If anybody was looking for the best bad massage and they were thinking to themselves, "Who's the best of that?" They'd have to go to you.

Huh. So you're saying like umm, if there was an award for the best bad massage, well who would get that?

Oh, it would be you! You! Monica! And you'd get all the votes!

So maybe they could umm, call the award the Monica?


Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! We know what’s gonna work! It’s doctor recommended!


Monica, I'm tellin' you, this guy is perfect for you.

Forget it. Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet.


Yeah, but y’know we could sneak in and watch.

Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! There’s some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.


Rach, you don't have to call whenever you have a little   question, okay? Trust me, I know this.

All right, I trust you. (Continues to dial)

Rachel, I can see you dialing! I don't understand why...

I'm on the phone! (On the phone) Dr. Wiener? (Ross   and Rachel walk away)


She’s mad because I know today’s her laundry day and that means she’s wearing her old lady underpants.


Well then I demand a recount! (Hmm, I wonder where I’ve heard that before.)


Okay Ross that’s fine, but can you please stand near my head?


The guy who made these hates feet and wants to see them die!

Well-well you can give them to me! I haven’t felt my feet in years!


No... no! And yet it did. Good-bye, Janice.

Oh, Chandler, sorry.

Ok, well, this was very special.

Rach, come see who's out here!


You're not going to believe this!

It's OK. It's OK. I was always rooting for you two kids to get together.

Hey Chandler, while you were sleeping that guy from your old job called again.

(on phone) Hey Mr. Kostelic! How's life on the fifteenth floor? (Listens) Yeah, I miss you too. (Listens) Yeah, it's a lot less satisfying to steal pens from your own home, you know? (Listens) Well, that's very generous (Listens) er, but look, this isn't about the money. I need something that's more than a job. I need something I can really care about.... (Listens) And that's on top of the yearly bonus structure you mentioned earlier? (Listens) Look, Al, Al... I'm not playing hardball here, OK? This is not a negotiation, this is a rejection! (Listens) No! No! No, stop saying numbers! I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You've got the wrong guy! (Listens) I'll see you on Monday! (slams the phone down)


Wait, Joey! Joey! That doesn’t mean that-that you're in love with me!

That kinda sounds like your dream dude.


Hey Chandler! Y’know that girl you went to college with who-who became a movie director?

Oh yeah, Dana Keystone. She was in my Movement class.


So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. (he tries to take a cookie but Monica slaps his hand)

These are for Erica!


Well, Ross does. What... You're - you're ruining the plan! Joey,       you've - you've fixed him up with his perfect woman!

joey was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


(starting to cry) Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. (They hug.)


Was that story over?


Phoebe, it's not about quantity.

Well...it's not about quality.

Oh really, you want to talk about quality? Have you heard of a key? It's what some people sing in.

Well at least all my songs don't taste like garlic. Yeah, there are other ingredients Monica.

Ok, so that's what we're doing. You know, when I'm in the coffee house bopping along to one of your songs, I'm wearing ear plugs.


Oh well, the woman I interviewed with was pretty tough, but y'know thank God Mark coached me, because once I started talking about the fall line, she got all happy and wouldn’t shut up.

Hi. I just talked to Joanna, and she loves you. You got it, you got the job.


Well, stuff like where’d we live, y’know? Like a small place outside the city, where our kids could learn to ride their bikes and stuff. Y’know, we could have a cat that had a bell on it’s collar and we could hear it every time it ran through the little kitty door. Of course, we’d have an apartment over the garage where Joey could grow old.


I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo, and I think I had too much tequila, and Nora- um, Mrs. Mom- your Bing- was just being nice, y'know, and- But nothing happened, nothing- Ask Joey, Joey, uh, came in-

Uh... y'know, knowledge is a tricky thing.


Listen, I’ve got a secret for ya. I let him win.

(laughs) Is that a secret or a lie.

No, I let him win—Ross!

me win. No, Chandler’s really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! (Waddles over to Mona.)

I am strong! I’ll show you! (He sits down at the table.)

Oh what’s the matter? Are you scared?


(entering) Hello Chandler, lovely day huh? (To Monica) You!

Phoebe if it helps Alexandra has only been massaging Monica for like three years. (Phoebe rolls her eyes and walks away and Monica glares at him.) If! I said, "If it helps!" (Goes to the bedroom.)


All right now, so? What do you think?


Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, come on, what. You took his underwear?


Oh come on Ross, we’ve done it before we’ll do it again, it’ll be a nice way to bookend the pregnancy.

This is insane, I’m not gonna make love to you just so that you’ll go into labor.

Make love? What are you a girl?

Always a great way to get in a man’s pants.

But you will, you will be performing a service. Okay? Just-just think of me as a ketchup bottle, y’know you sometimes you have to bang on the end of it just to get something to come out.


This guy could be my baby’s stepfather!


Yeah that dog left!

(walks to Phoebe's door) Phoebe! Phoebe, open up!

There's no dog in here.

No that's just me coughing! (Doing some weird coughing noises and the dog barks again. Phoebe comes out of the room.) Oh, good, there you are! Listen, um, I have a dog in my room.


Oh yeah, and what would my opening line be? 'Excuse me. Blarrglarrghh.'


Hey! I’m sorry! That—(sees that Joey is about to leave) where are you going?


Carol? I was just wondering if Joey could ask you a question about breast-feeding?

It did at first, but not anymore.


Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! We know what’s gonna work! It’s doctor recommended!

I’m sorry, but we have to have some boundaries! My God, I’m dying.

Make love? What are you a girl?


Yeah, but y’know we could sneak in and watch.

Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! There’s some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I was a Kappa. (to them) Hey sisters! (They ignore her.) (To Monica) Wow, we really are bitches.

(to the class) Right! So when Rigby got his samples back from the laboratory he made a startling discovery! What he believed to be igneous, was in fact sedimentary. Imagine his consternation when—(sees Monica and Rachel.) Oh bloody hell.

What the hell are you doing?!

Look, I was nervous! You guys had me all worried I was going to be boring! I got up there and they were all like staring at me. I opened my mouth and this British accent just came out.


Whoa, whoa, prom night flashback.


(not sure of what to do) Y’know what? I don’t, I don’t think Phoebe really wants to come.

No! I do want to!

Oh, she does want to.

Pheebs, I don’t know what to say. I guess the flea market was just better last time.


No. And I don’t think I’m gonna want to.

I can’t do this.

Well, oh, Mark, I’m doing this for the wrong reasons, y'know? I’m just doing it to get back at Ross. I’m sorry, it’s not very fair to you.

mark was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Ask them if it would be faster if we cut the baby’s face off the    penis, so we can put it on the bunny. (pause). That is a weird sentence!

Oh! Believe you me! I am going to bring this cake back, I don't even    want it in my home... (Turns towards the cake and sees Joey trying to take a    piece and yells at him) Joey, don't touch it!!

rachel addressed joey, not ross (ground truth)


Please. Half the guys out there have makeup on.

All right, half the people. I mean, just try it and see.

No. I am not putting on makeup. (Knock at the door. Phoebe enters.)

phoebe was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


No you’re fine. (Joey checks anyway.) All right well, do you think I could take Rachel?

Will you relax?! What are you taking this so seriously for? It doesn’t matter.


(With Big Eyes.) All right, you’re right. I’ll talk to her.

Yes talk to her. Be a man.

Chandler come on. We have to hem the new dust ruffle.

monica addressed chandler, not joey (ground truth)


How do you feel about all this?


Oh, I was unbelievable.

All right, Ross!

heard. I mean, there were characters, plot lines, themes, a motif... at one point there were villagers.


Okay. Thanks you guys. Pheebs are you wearing fur?

Okay, let's get some perspective people; it's not like I'm wearing a seeing-eye dog coat!

Hey, y'know Ross, I think I kinda understand why I kinda lost it today.

joey addressed ross, not phoebe (ground truth)


Well, I eat a lot of meat right?

Well, suppose until the baby’s born I laid off it. No extra animals would die, you-you’d just be eating my animals.


Wow! That is a bad audition.

gunther did not speak next (ground truth)


(to Chandler) Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I never get to be yours at all?

Oh no-no-no, you—yeah, of course you get to be my best man.

(impatiently tapping Chandler on the shoulder) What about me?! You-you just said I could!

I’m not even getting married! Okay, this is a question for science fiction writers!

I can’t believe you’re not picking me.


Hey! You guys! You’re not gonna believe this! I just got off the phone with my agent…


Oh! Right. Umm, maybe that’s because I didn’t send him an invitation.

Chandler! He’s your father; he should be at the wedding.

I don’t even know the man. Okay? We’re not the close. I haven’t seen him in years.

Well what are you gonna do when he finds out he wasn’t even asked?!

Well he doesn’t have to know! It’s not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.

Trust me, you don’t want him there either. Okay? Nobody is gonna be staring at the bride when the father of the groom is wearing a back-less dress.


Come on little Chandler, it's time to be born. Come on little Chandler! Come on!

chandler was addressed by frank jr and spoke (ground truth)


I tell people secrets. It makes them like me.

Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.

(in a nasally voice, from her cold) But I'm unemployed, my music is all I really have now. Well music, and making my own shoes. (She puts her shoe on the table, and it's horribly decorated) Pretty, huh? (Sneezes)


Hey, Chandler, can we please stay focused on my problem here?! Y'know?

I’m talking about you. You big, big freak.


I'm sorry, my pie was, was in your hood. Now I just have to get the coffee out of that guy's pants and I'll be back in the hospital by 7. [swats at an imaginary insect by his head, guy leaves promptly]

Damnit Ross, get your butt out of the bathroom.

Calm down, I'm blow drying.

Blow drying what, you have no hair.


What am I gonna do?


Sure, what do you want to see?

I don't know, umm…

Oh, I know how we can decide. Phoebe, show him your game!

Umm, no thank you. (She gets up and moves to the couch. They were at a table previously.)


Phoebe, what are you doing?


everywhere she goes.


Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?

Why am I not surprised?


Oh great. So all I need to do is get some new skin. Thank you.


Look I want you, now.

That's Great. You know we don't need to talk about this now. Really, I mean this is, is so way, way, way, in the future, I'm talkin' hovercrafts and apes taking over the planet.


Oh, you're not gonna tell the whole story about how your parents got divorced again are you?

Oh God, no.

Oh, come on! I wanna hear it! It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without Chandler bumming us out!

chandler was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


I did it anyway.

Phoebe! Come on! Let’s go! (Knocks on her door.) Come on! (Phoebe enters with guitar and not ready to go.) Why aren’t you dressed yet?!

monica addressed phoebe, not joey (ground truth)


So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?! Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker?

He didn’t ask me to marry him.

He wanted to tell me he’s gonna compete is some ultimate fighting competition thingy.


No, I will. I’m just not up for it tonight.

Hey Rach listen, no matter what this guy says I want you to know you’re not gonna be alone in this.

Listen I uh… (He takes her hand.) It’s a scary world out there especially if you’re a single mom. Y’know, I always felt like you and I have this-this special bond. Y’know? So, (gets down on one knee again) Rachel Green will you marry me?

No! Joey, oh you’re so sweet. You’re so-so sweet, honey. But I’m not, I’m not looking for a husband.


I am going… I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm… I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)

Oh my God! You really are freakishly strong!


(entering) Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!

(looking at the table) Excuse me ladies. (To Phoebe) I’m sorry?

My massage client, Arthur? His daughter called and said that some guy that worked for me gave him a really weird massage this afternoon.

(incredulous) I gave him an extremely professional massage!

He said you poked at him with wooden spoons.

Okay, so it wasn’t uh, a traditional massage. But I did give him accu-pressure with a pair of chopsticks. And, and I gently exfoliated him with, with a mop.


Yeah, but how much can you tell from a look?

No, I felt it on my hip. You could tell.


All right. Chandler, you can either spin the wheel or pick a Google card.


You do realise  that's your brother?

Not until you said it. Somebody switch! (Chandler   makes a clicking sound with his fingers and Phoebe runs to the other wall.   Monica returns to Chandlers wall.) Wait a minute... Ross and Charlie, Joey   and Rachel, Phoebe and Mike! We're the only people  leaving with the   same person we came with.

That's not true. I came with Monica and I'm leaving   with Weird Al.

Okay, I've had it with the hair jokes. Tomorrow morning,   before we leave, I'm going to the salon.


Oh, we’re having a big party tomorrow night. Later! (Starts for the door.)

Whoa! Hey-hey, you planning on inviting us?


Almost over man.

(says hi to his grandma) Look! Oh! (Pointing out the window.) Is that the Pope?! (Chandler and his grandma turn to look and Joey slips a tape into the VCR.)

Why am I looking?

Oh, here I am, here's my big scene!

(on the tape) All right back off! I gotta gun! I'm not afraid to use it!


What is this obsessive need you have to make everyone agree with you? No,what's that all about? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope.

ross was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Really? You don’t think that’s a little inappropriate. (She’s wearing a tank top and has her belly sticking out.)

Good God man don’t anger it.

Ross, it is 100 degrees outside. For the first time in weeks, I am somewhat comfortable.

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!

feel your ears?

Chandler, where are your tools?

(sarcastically) Oh, I left them on my bulldozer... I don't have tools!


Okay, I wanna be sexy again so I'm trying to catch a cold. It should be easy, supposedly they're pretty common.


Because! Because I was sad.

What do you mean?

Look, I am so…so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that I’m not. I’m not even close. And I don’t know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that that’s dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!

rachel addressed chandler, not monica (ground truth)


(sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Ross’s situation?

Well, I sorta am. I mean yeah, I’m dating this girl who’s also seeing another guy. But, I don’t know, I’m not to worried about it.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh, you can't show Phoebe this! She hates those corporate massage    chains.

phoebe was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


(yelling in pain) I know nothing! Mike’s a great guy, it was hypothetical!

All right. (she releases him). He is a good guy. You’re right, he wouldn’t cheat.


Okay. Head Ross! Head Ross! Head Ross!

Right! Right! I just—I want you to know that I’m going to be there through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctor’s appointments, the uh, the Lamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartment—Although we could probably worry about that ‘til after we get married.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Ross, say something. Anything.

So you two are..?


This is so exciting! It’s so glamorous! People taking our picture. How do I look?

A little tall.

Do you mind crouching down a little bit, so that I look taller? (Chandler does so) There you go. (And they walk down the red carpet.)


Oh, I knew something had to be wrong, because my fingernails did not grow at all yesterday.

Yeah, well, I guess they had a fight, and he got drunk....

Oh!! (hits Chandler and Joey in the head) You guys knew about this and you didn’t tell us?!

monica addressed chandler, not phoebe (ground truth)


Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff.


Because! Because I was sad.

What do you mean?


(looks) Oh my God, you’re right! I am too late; they’re sitting on the couch and talking! (To Patrick) Come on! (They go over to the couch.) Rachel?

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


(To Joey) You ate meat! (Joey is shocked) (To Chandler and Monica) You had sex! (They’re shocked.)

joey was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


You bought Shawn Cassidy!


So you think Ross too?

Uh, in her defense, she’s right. I am stronger. I would destroy you.


Um, well, I was going to, I-I-I really was. But um, then somewhere, just out of nowhere, I didn’t.


I’m sick of Japanese. We’re not going there.

All right, wherever you wanna go is cool.


, she is just my wife! Phoebe, will you-will you help me out here?

Well, I thought you loved her when you-when you married her.

with that amount of alcohol!

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Ohhhh, I cannot look at it! (She doesn't move.)

Chandler, why are you doing this?

I don't know. But I know I'm not afraid to do this.

I'm doing this because I'm sorry?

Do you umm, you really think the best reason to get married is because you're sorry?


You don’t need to fill these silences.

Chandler, that’s like your fourth cup of coffee!

Well, I am drinking lots of cups of coffee because I’m exhausted! Because Joey started snoring!


So tell me something. What does the phrase 'no date pact' mean to you?


Well, what’d you do?

I did it anyway.

Phoebe! Come on! Let’s go! (Knocks on her door.) Come on! (Phoebe enters with guitar and not ready to go.) Why aren’t you dressed yet?!

I’m sorry, but I just wrote the best dance song for your wedding. Check this out. (Gets ready to play.)

(grabs the guitar away from her) No, Phoebe, I’ll tell you what, if you get ready now I’ll let you play it at the wedding.


Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon, God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your- (thinks) -big lizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.

joey was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!

Okay, let's go running!

Yeah and there's really cute guys there.


I can't believe this!

(terrified) Right, because it's fast. Because, it's so fast. It's fast!

Relax! It's Phoebe! Not you!

fast. Isn't it?

No, I like him a lot but I don't think I'm ready for this!


(while Rachel is finishing her rant) Okay! Okay! Okay! It’s okay. (Rachel stops.) It’s okay. Hey, it’s too weird for you, I won’t see her again.

No-no-no! No-no-no! Please Ross, I can’t! I can’t do it! (Starts to freak out.) It’s just gonna freak me out!!!

Okay! Okay! Ooh-hey-hey-hey! Okay! Okay! Okay! I’ll-I’ll tell her tonight I can’t see her anymore.


Oh God, here we go!

Anytime anything comes close to touching her eye or anyone else's she like freaks out. Watch! Watch! (He takes his finger and moves it towards his eye.)


Why would I eat my own arm?

Well you wouldn't, but we own the paper, we can print whatever we want.

You know what, Ross? I'm gonna throw in 50 bucks for you.

monica addressed ross, not chandler (ground truth)


Yeah, the Knicks rule!

Joey, this is you!

joey was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


OK honey, you're dating Ross.

Russ is Ross. Russ... Ross!


Y'know what, I want to talk to you about this so much, but we should probably do it when we could really get into it, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?


I wasn't. Let's get going!


Okay, I feel like I’m talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!

I, but you’re so close! No!

Okay, does it involve something to do with Pete’s computer company?

Oh, just go. You’re never gonna get it!

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


(sits next to him) Phoebe, it’s okay that you don’t want me to be your girlfriend because I have the best boyfriend.