Uh, if I were omnipotent for a day, I'd..

See, there's always one guy. (Mocking)

Hey, Joey, what would you do if you were

monica addressed joey, not chandler (ground truth)


(entering from the bedroom wearing a big, pink bunny costume) Monica! Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume…

monica was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Great. It was great. She’s ah, she’s great, great looking, great personality, she’s greatness.

Sounds like she’s got the ah, whole package.


Nah, I’m too depressed to eat. I’ll probably eat in like 5 minutes. So I guess I’ll just fly home with you guys, what time’s your flight?

What about my cab?


Who cares?! I-I’ll make payments, whatever it takes, I want the Mr. Bowmont!!

Oh my God, you’re back!

Ohh, let me see it! Let me see your hand! (Chandler is frantically trying to wave them off.)

phoebe addressed chandler, not joey (ground truth)


Okay. Okay. Okay. Umm, maybe you can start with, "Chandler, even though we were friends; there was a part of me that always knew I wanted more."

chandler was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


No well, no it's not that bad, y'know? I mean yeah, my tongue feels a little fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up.

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh, did you beat him at a board game? He turns into such a baby when he starts to lose.

Eh! Stop it!

Chandler! What are you doing here?

Joey kicked me out of the car on the George Washington bridge!

I don't know! He went crazy! Y'know, we were playing that game where you-you ask a question and you answer it really fast.


You told me you hate massages!


What do ya say? What do ya say?

Well, I, I like the idea of naming him after someone I love, and Joey and Chandler are great names. (They both stare at her.) But, all right, I don’t—maybe I’ll just name him The Hulk.

joey was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Forget it! Okay, I’m not giving up my bachelor pad for some basketball seats!

Have you even had a girl up here?

No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.

joey was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


I put it on to scare Chandler!

chandler was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Yeah but I was just screwing with you to try to get your voice all high and weird like mine is now!

Yes, but haven’t you wanted a kid like forever?


Joey! Why did you tell Chandler that Monica was getting a boob job?

Joey, Chandler knows I borrowed the money.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Uh, no, I got to see Donald Trump waiting for an elevator.


What if I smack my head on the concrete?

Well, I’m gonna lie to you Joey, it’s a possibility.

joey was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Everyone at our school heard it!

Everybody at my school heard it! You were the hermaphrodite cheerleader from Long Island?!

Oh no!!!! Oh my God!! This is all making so much sense to me now! This is why Adam Carter wouldn’t go out with me! This is why Billy Tratt would just stay in this region! (Motions to her breasts.) (Joey has turned around.)

joey was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Chandler, you have an assistant right?

(angrily) Did she call? You-you told her I was sick right? Always tell her I am sick!

No, I-I just don’t know how you decide who to hire. I mean I’ve got it narrowed down to two people. One of them has great references and a lot of experience and then there’s this guy…


(steps up and points at her) All right! You and me! Let’s go! Right now!

All right! All right! Enough! Enough! Enough!! Enough! (To Chandler and Monica) You two go home! I-I-I gotta talk to Janine! (They start to leave.)


Relax. Here hold this (hands her his beer). This old stuff just comes right off. (he bends down to try and lift some tile right in the middle of the floor, in his tight pants.)


Of course it was! Trust me, when it comes to psychology I know what I'm talking about. I took two psych classes in college.

You took the same class twice.

Here, Monica, look what I got to wear when I play at the restaurant (she dons a top hat) uh, huh wait! (she raises a pair of spectacles to her eyes) Right? I mean, this might even class up the ballad of the uncircumcised man.

monica was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Fine. Fine, but I want the record to show that I tried to take the high road, because in about five minutes I’m gonna be saying…(He laughs and points at Rachel sarcastically.)

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


I want you to like her! But if that's too damned difficult for you, then the least you can do is pretend.

Well then, do it better!

Okay, what do you saw I go over there and say how much I like her? (Joey gives him a thumbs up) No-no it'll be good, I can tell her much I've been thinking about her. That I haven't stopped thinking about her since the moment I met her. That I'm so fantastically, over-the-top, wanna-slit-my-own-throat in love with her, that for every minute of every hour of every day I can't believe my own damn bad luck that you met her first!!

Well, that's pretty good. But you might wanna tone it down a little.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Hey Ross! The baby’s kicking!

What?! It is?! (He tries to quickly remove his gloves, but runs into trouble and finally throws them off of his hands like a hockey player in a fight and grabs Rachel’s belly.)


Oh yeah, about telling Mom and Dad, I was thinking about maybe writing a letter.

Alright, you know what? That’s it. You’ve had your chance.

(out loud, to her parents) Mom! Dad! Ross smoked pot in college!

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Chandler! (Knocks on the door.) Chandler! I just figured out who you are!

Can you figure out what I’m doing?


What an interesting approach to guitar instruction. Y'know some might find it amusing, I myself find it regular.

Hey everybody, Rachel was so good today. She didn't gossip at all.

I didn’t! Even when I found out…umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. (Goes into her room.)


There I am.

You’re gonna get pregnant.


If you want, I'll do it.


Yeah, and you have nothing to worry about 'cos they're all crap!


I had to talk loud because the movie was loud!

(to Monica and Rachel) He's talking to London!

monica was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Still on Amelia Earhart?

The woman just vanished!

Seriously, Ross, you don't want in on this?

No! Do you know what your odds are of winning the lottery? I...I mean you have a better chance of being struck by lightning 42 times.


No, we only went out once.

You dated her!


All right. Did everyone get out okay?


Please. If she said to you, "Ross, I want you on this couch, right here, right now," what would you say?

It's, it's, it's, uh, a totally diferent situation! It's, it's apples and oranges, it's, it's orthodontists and lesbi- I gotta go.


Oh. Why not?

‘Cause I know he’s gonna flip out and I hate it when he’s angry.

What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again he’d make me eat the entire pack.

phoebe was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


(pulling Chandler away from the Maitre d') You need to give him money.

Give him money? It was a joke!

No, to get a table! Places like are always shakin’ you down. Everybody wants to be paid off.

Right, calm down, O'Mally. I'll slip him some money.

You've got to be smooth about it.


Joey, (nervously) where did you learn that word?

Where do you think, (pause) Zelda?

(gasps) You found my book?!

Yeah I did!


I see, I see, y-y-you're trying to freak me out.

Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak…out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.

ross addressed monica, not chandler (ground truth)


That’s not why you’re going! You’re going because you hope he’s gonna say, "Yeah, I love you too, Rach. Forget that British chippy."

Ohh—Do you think he will?!

No! Because he’s in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go, you’re just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Y’know, it’s too late! You missed you’re chance! I’m sorry, I know this must be really hard, it’s over.

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, we’re having a big party tomorrow night. Later! (Starts for the door.)

Whoa! Hey-hey, you planning on inviting us?

Hey!! Get your ass back here, Tribbiani!! (Joey walks back in, scared.)

Are you bachelors?

Are you strippers?

Then you’re not invited. (Starts for the door again.)

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


What is it doing here?


Oh, Chandler, that's sweet. But you don't have to do everything Doctor Phil tells you to do.

I'm serious, let me do something, just not the turkey or the stuffing, nothing "high profile".


(She opens the door.) Hey Ross. What's up bro?


And you're gonna make them all disappear.


Why won’t you let me massage you?

Monica! We lived together for years! I’ve seen you naked!

That’s different, we were roommates! And when?!


. (Joey  enters.) I’ll call you back.

Who was that?

It’s just the pizza place.

You hung up on the pizza place? I don’t hang up on your friends.


Uh, Delaware. She's on her way though, so until she gets here, I'm gonna be your coach. But don't worry, she told me all about the la-Mazada stuff.

Yeah, that's when if you get the babies out by the end of the month, they give you 2% financing.

(entering) Monica? You gonna be very proud of me. I just got us dates with two unbelievably cute nurses.

Umm. (Looks at Chandler who is using the phone.) Umm. Umm. I don't think so.

frank jr did not speak next (ground truth)


No, I let him win—Ross!

me win. No, Chandler’s really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! (Waddles over to Mona.)

I am strong! I’ll show you! (He sits down at the table.)


What? Is it the comet? (Runs over to where Joey’s standing.)

No! No-no. Look, there’s a bug stuck in tar right here. (Bends down to get a closer look.)

Joey come—I can’t believe—I bring you here to see the Bapstein-King comet, one of nature’s most spectacular phenomenon, and all you care about are bugs stuck in tar and-and some woman!

Right-right up here. (Starts looking at them through a piece of pipe.)

(noticing the pipe and looking at the door) Joey where’s the pipe that was holding the door open?


What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box.

Gunther! Gunther. Gunther, please tell me you didn’t say anything to Rachel about me and the girl from the Xerox place.

at you, not because I stopped loving you!

You still love me?

What does this mean? What do you, I mean do you wanna, get back together?


I'm his sister, okay? I love him! I don't want to see him get hurt! Come on! Doesn’t that give me the right to control him—help him?

I don't think he's the one who needs help.

No, look, she's obviously unstable, okay? I mean she's thinking about running out on her wedding day. (Rachel slowly turns and glares at her.) (Realizing what she just said.) Okay, fine! But I mean, look at the position she's putting him in! What's he gonna do? Ross is gonna run over there on the wedding day and break up the marriage?! I mean, who would do that?! (Rachel again turns and glares at her in disgust.) Okay, fine, all right, but that's y'know, it's different! Although it did involve a lot of the same people.

rachel was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


You all right Chandler? Is there something funny about that name?

No. No, I just think that maybe I-I'd heard it somewhere before. (Sits down rubbing his temple.)


Ross couldn't fit down the trash chute.

Just, y'know out.

Ohh, out, oh God, I don't know why we didn't think to check there!


Kip, my old roommate, y'know we all used to hang out together.

Oh, that poor bastard.

See? Yeah, you told me the story. He and Monica dated when they broke up they couldn't even be in the same room together and you all promised that you would stay his friend and what happened? He got phased out!

monica was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, Rachel, sweetie, look, here's a really cute picture of Joey and you at the reception.

Ohh, he's married! Ross is married. I can't—I still can't believe it. (Rachel grabs the picture from Monica)

Honey, sweetie, by the edges.

I mean, y'know I'm just gonna have to accept it (She grabs the rest of the pictures)…

…I mean it's my fault.

Sweetie! Edges! Fingers! Smudgey! Pictures!

Oh my God! (She licks the top picture and hands them back.)


No Ross!! (stands up and moves away from him) Don’t! You can’t just kiss me and think you’re gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesn’t work that way. It doesn’t just make it better. Okay?

(moving over to stand in front of her) Okay, okay. This morning you said there was nothing so big that we couldn’t work past it together...

Yeah, what the hell did I know!


(to Rachel) Uh, how long until they announce the numbers, Mommy?


time’s the charm. (Chandler enters.) Aww, look at you all handsome!

Whose is it?

Oh does it matter?! All that matters is that you look so handsome.

Whose is it?

I don’t want to say.


Yeah, but only a genius would swallow a sonic blaster gun.

Oh, I’ve been there. Yeah, I am gonna go drive my Porsche. (Starts to leave.)


Joey? What's going on?

joey was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


What? Rach! Come on, that’s terrible!  They’re…uh…they’re babies. They’re-they’re all beautiful.


Oh Joey, Melanie called, said she's gonna be late.

I don't know, she's, uh.... she's pretty great.


So you stole that tape from Richard's apartment?

Whoho ho... Listen to the judgement from the porn    star!

That tape was never meant to be seen by... (pauses)    Joey I would feel more comfortable if I was having this conversation in private.

(laughs) Monica, look... I don't think you and I have    any secrets anymore... (Monica keeps looking at Joey) Not ready to joke about    it yet, okay, I see you later. (Joey walks out)


Let me see that! (Grabs the invitation and reads it.) Oh man!

The only superpower you have is a slightly heightened sense of smell. (Hands him the jacket and walks away.)

(entering) Hey! Uh, Monica? Chandler? Can I talk to you guys for a second?


Because she is!

Joey, Chandler knows I borrowed the money.

Mmmm hmm! For your boob job!

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


I can't believe it. Paolo kissed my mom?

Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.

Uh... y'know, knowledge is a tricky thing.

Hey, hey, hey, you're lucky I caught them when I did, or else who knows what woulda happened.


Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems that…if you’re gonna have a roommate, y’know it might as well be the father.

But Joey, I don’t think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. I mean—(Ross turns to her with wishful eyes.)—Or he does.

rachel addressed ross, not joey (ground truth)


Okay, I got it. Phoebe? All right, you pull. I'm gonna spread the legs as wide as I can. (Joey starts giggling.) Joey? Now is not the time!

joey was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Okay, let's go!

Atlantic City, baby! Let's roll some bones! Hey Joey, high-five for rolling bones!

Uh, Pheebs, you're leaking?

All right. Well, don't worry, I call shotgun! (She starts out the door.)


You get your messages!


Yeah, this is Tag. Tag, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, can I see you for a second? (Goes into office.)

Oh, you like that? You should hear my phone number.

(grabbing Phoebe) Okay. We’ll be right back. (They go into her office and she closes the door.)


Put your hands together.


You got it.

Okay, see ya later.

See ya. (Ross exits, and Chandler moves over next to Joey, laughing.) Have fun planning your mellow bachelor party.

chandler addressed joey, not ross (ground truth)


Monica, Monica, look at this lamp. Is this tacky or what? We have to have this.

Rache, I think we have enough regular lamps.

What? Come on, it's not like I'm asking for this girly clock or anything,which, by the way, I also think is very cool.

It doesn't go with any of my stuff.

Well, what about my stuff?


That he doesn't exist.


What a beautiful night to be running around the street, looking for tickets. And the wind sure made it fun.


What is your job?

Staying out of the way.


(to Bonnie) So ah, your first sexual experience was with a woman?!

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Phoebe, where's your purse?

You can't have it.


Hey Joey, what ‘cha doing?

Sweepin’. Why? Turn you on?

Huh. What if I was sweeping a chimney?

my face cream?

Where are you going? The vicar won’t be home for hours.

Joey, (nervously) where did you learn that word?

Where do you think, (pause) Zelda?


Ross, are you okay?

I'm fine! I saw a psychiatrist at work today.

On account of my rage.


So what? I drove down, sold T-shirts, had a blast. And y’know who knows how to party? Drunk college chicks.

Okay, she can’t go.

Ross, you can’t tell her not to go. You just started dating.

Then what am I supposed to do?

Nothing, you just have to be cool with it.


Yeah. No. And you know what? Nobody even saw!


Yeah, I’m not gonna pay for those acting classes anymore.


Well uh, I-I’m a paleontologist. Umm, I-I live in New York. I have a son Ben. Uh, hi Ben! (Waves.) And uh…

I said a little bit Ross. Now, how about you Chandler?

Well Joey, I’m a headhunter. I hook up out of work Soviet scientists with rogue third-world nations. Hi Rasputin! (Waves.)


Oh that’s right. It’s your first day! So are you psyched to fight fake crime with your robot sidekick?

Am I psyched? The lead in my own TV series? I’ve dreamed about this for years! Why have I not been preparing?!


Rachel Karen Green, where's the other earring?!

Tell her to wear her own earrings.

Nooo! Nooooo! You lent me Monica's earrings?! I'm not allowed to borrow her stuff!


I see, I see, y-y-you're trying to freak me out.

Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak…out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.


It's easy, you just walk in on them having sex.

Oh, so they owe me like, three Phoebes.

Oh my god! Look, it's Ross and Rachel. Oh, the plan is working.

ross was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, Monica, c'mon, you do cool things.

Oh really? Okay, let's compare, shall we.

(Yawning) Oh, it's so late for 'Shall we'...


Seriously, I-I asked you before and you still haven’t gotten it.

See, now it’s weird again.


Do you know what I was thinkin’?

Nothing, I just like to go like this. (Does it again.)

(entering from the bathrooms) Hey Chandler, what are you doing tonight?

Uh why, do you have a lecture?


All right umm, a string quartet for the procession.

for dancing. Wait, that was from my sixth grade wedding.


Joey, we're not keeping this!

But it's an original Buffay...


Look, Chandler, I told you, never tell anyone about this dog thing. It's like Ross not likin’ ice cream.

Okay, it's just that dogs make me a little uncomfortable.

And I don't wanna say this, I don't you guys to hate me, but uh, I don't think, I can be around that dog anymore. Okay, so either the dog goes, or I go. (An awkward silence ensues.) Oh my god!!


Joey, (nervously) where did you learn that word?

joey was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Where are you going?

How about you guys? (Points to Phoebe and Joey.)

rachel addressed phoebe, not joey (ground truth)


Hi! Oh you guys look so beautiful!


I'll take sports.

All right. Uhh, international.


Ok, Ross, whats going on here, are we just bringing strange  women back to the apartment now?

I dont know, are we just kissing guys on balconies?

How do you know about that?

Through the magic of sight! I was here, putting our child to  sleep...


Oh, and Monica gets to keep her?   In her house? I am so jealous!

You know, I would give her up, for you.


Yes, it was horrible. She cried. I cried. She threw things, they hit me. Anyway,I did the right thing.

[in phone] So, Spock actually hugs his father?

Hey, do you guys have...[sees Ross, pauses]...hi.

I uh, I just got back from uh, from Julie's.

No, no, uh, it's not what you think. It's um the other thing.

Well, what's the other thing, what do I think?

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Yeah, y'know what? I'm-I'm gonna meet you upstairs in a minute.


I got fired.

Yeah, they said I acted too much with it. I told everybody about this! Now everybody's gonna go to the theatre, expecting to see me, and...

Oh, Joey, you know what, no-one is gonna be able to tell.

My mom will.


Oh yeah, and what would my opening line be? 'Excuse me. Blarrglarrghh.'

Oh, c'mon. She's a person, you can do it!


Hey Chandler, why so fancy?

Well, I got a job interview. It’s kinda a big deal too. Its a lot more money and I’d be doing data reconfiguration and statistical factoring.


Pheebs is your grandmother maybe saying that you should live here alone?

You heard her too?! You have the gift!


I don't get it. What do you see in this guy, anyway?

Well... he happens to be a very nice... guy....


What's wrong? What's wrong? You're married that's what's wrong.


This Thanksgiving kicks last Thanksgiving's ass!

To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.

I can't believe they called, and we're actually getting a baby. (she kisses Chandler)


My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen.


Ross, see! I told you, those swings are evil! Alright, that is it.    That is     the last time Emma is getting on one of those things for her entire life.

No! No, no, no, no, okay, it wasn't the swing's fault. It was my fault    and kind     of that (point to the kid that kicked him) kids fault. Who is still laughing.    Nice.

Ross, c'mon, please. Can we just get out of here, before somebody else    gets     hurt?

No wait, okay, okay, I have an idea. I want you to get on the swing,    okay? And     you'll see that there's nothing to be afraid of.

(looks at him suspiciously) I know what this is all about... You've    always been     jealous of my hair.

Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your    silly     fears.

Alright fine. I'll do it.


that she put me in charge of cups and ice.

Y'know I rued the day once…didn't get a whole lot else done.


Okay. All right, that's true! But y'know I just don't embarrass that easily.

What?! You totally get embarrassed!


Have you guys picked a date yet?

Oh no, not yet.


It's easy, you just walk in on them having sex.

Oh, so they owe me like, three Phoebes.


Oh my God! I cannot believe you guys are talking about this! The problems in the bedroom are between the man and the woman!!! All right?!! Now Chandler is doing the best he can!!

chandler was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, I didn't know you wanted her too!


No, you sh—No you said you made that up!!


Oh! okay. Wait, are we in Joey's imagination?

(looking into one of her shopping bags) Oh no! I took one of Ross' bags by      mistake, and one of mine is missing.


And starting to think about settling down!

Hey Joey, will you please set this up for people to put Emma's presents    on?


There are snow cones! (Monica glares at him.) Snow cones! Yuck!

Y'know…go! Go! Right there! (Points)


What are you talking about?!

(sets Ben down) Well, it's not for sure but umm, we met this guy in the park who thought Ben was really cute--y'know, which he is--so umm anyhoo, he uh, he gave us his card and told us to bring him down for this commercial he's auditioning.

(reading the card) Whoa! This guy is like the biggest commercial casting director in town! (Ross gasps) Ben takes one lousy walk in the park and gets an audition!! (Ross and Carol stare at him, then Joey realizes what he just said.) I mean, way to go Ben! (Gives Ben the thumbs up, which Ben returns.) Man! I've been in that park a million times and no one offered me an audition.

ross was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


(intrigued) Yeah? (Monica nods yes.) I hope you’re not thinking about cleaning the living room.

What?! What are you doing?!

Do you know what just happened?

Yeah. We-we had sex and then we fell asleep.


(entering) What's going on?

Nothing! Oh God, we're just so excited that you want to get this apartment!

Actually, it looks really good. (Turns towards the window and now Phoebe starts jumping to divert his attention.)

ross addressed phoebe, not rachel (ground truth)


I don’t know. I like her, you know. She’s different. There’suh, somethin’ about her.

That you like, (snappily confronting Joey over the heads of the knittingcircle) we get it. You like her. Great!


Couldn't you just stay like this forever? (His eyes snap open.) Chandler! Couldn't you just stay here forever?

Yeah, here, somewhere else, y'know where-where ever. (Gets up.)


Skidmark’s still got a way with the ladies.

Hi! I just want to apologize. I’m really sorry I was a baby.


Well y’know I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by your building and I thought to myself, "What’s up with Carol and sweet, little Ben?"

Umm uh, I’ll make some coffee and we can uh, chat.

I’d love that. I would loooove… (Carol goes to make the coffee and she sits down.) So uh, so where is sweet little Ben? I would love to have a little...

I found him! (To Ben) Very funny, come here! (She sits down on the coffee table and Ben walks up.) That is exactly why I’ve come here to talk to you okay?

(from the kitchen) Rach, do you want some sugar in your coffee?

Yes oh—(To Ben)—Do I want sugar in my coffee? (Ben nods no.) No, just some milk would be good Carol. Thanks. (To Ben) Okay, do you remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?


Oh no-no-no, no more offers. You can’t offer anything to us!


Rachel, didn't have anything that I liked, so, but she had this Christmas ribbon, and I thought, 'All right, fine I'll be political.'

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Ah, we’re out. I sold them all.


Ross, the heat!

Fine, OK! Heat, heat, heat, and I'm the obsessive one. [goes to the radiator and starts turning the knob] OK, this way is on, so this is. . . [breaks off the knob] off.

No, no, I was turnin' the knob and, and. . . here it is.

Well put it back.


Why won’t you let me massage you?

Monica! We lived together for years! I’ve seen you naked!

That’s different, we were roommates! And when?!

I’m curious about the human body.


Chandler, we still haven’t gotten an RSVP from your dad.

Oh! Right. Umm, maybe that’s because I didn’t send him an invitation.

Chandler! He’s your father; he should be at the wedding.

I don’t even know the man. Okay? We’re not the close. I haven’t seen him in years.

Well what are you gonna do when he finds out he wasn’t even asked?!

Well he doesn’t have to know! It’s not like we run in the same circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.


Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, let’s talk about it!! How was she?

She, she was different.


My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen.

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.

Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!

Oh good! 'Cause where else would we get any?


So Ross, how was your date the other night? Did you tell her about the magical ride that starts with the flush of every toilet?

Laugh all you want but uh, she actually left me a message saying she’d like to go out again.


Ross, you were right before, it was just a stupid fight about a room.

Okay, there are no stupid fights!! This isn’t about the room, this is about what the room…represents! And unfortunately, this room (Points to Rachel’s room) could destroy you!!


Third one from the left?


Okay. Head Ross! Head Ross! Head Ross!

Right! Right! I just—I want you to know that I’m going to be there through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctor’s appointments, the uh, the Lamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartment—Although we could probably worry about that ‘til after we get married.

Well yeah, I think we should get married.


No, no, Phoebs. You know why? Cause he's dead.

OK, I guess this is gonna seem kinda bittersweet now, but... Joey, that's who.

Yeah, my agent just called me with an audition for Days of Our Lives!

Hey, yeah... we could all sleep together and then one of us could get amnesia.


Hey, someone order a coat?

Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see.

He won't? [remembers what it is] He won't! Because, isn't that, isn't that the,the short story you were writing?


Hey! How’d your date go with Jake?


(grabs a bag of those Styrofoam peanuts) I’ll be coordinator! Oh my God! I’m so sorry, I didn’t get you anything! Okay, look everybody has to help! Okay? You can help, can’t you Phoebe?

I have plans.

All right, Chandler can make boxes, Ross can wrap, and Joey can lift things. Now Phoebe, go tell the guys they have to help out!

Okay! (To Rachel) Oh my God, thank you!!


Uh, only if you have the hiccups too. Yeah, the pictures are for you, the water and the chocolate is for me. I just didn’t feel like getting up. Okay, I’m gonna show you a picture of Ross. Okay? And you’re going to remember all of the bad things about him. All right? Really focus on his flaws.

I can do that. I certainly did it when we were going out.

Okay. Umm, before we get started, I just wanna say for the record that I love Ross, I think he’s such a great guy. Here. (Hands her the picture, Rachel grabs it out of her hand.) Okay, now, close your eyes. And imagine that you’re with Ross okay and imagine that you’re kissing him. And you’re-you’re running your hands all over his body. And then you run your hands through his hair, but eew-oh gross it’s some kind of grease, it’s—uck! Hah?


No! I’m not! I-I-I just think it’s wrong! It’s-it’s that I’m—Here I am about to pop and he’s out picking up some shop girl at Sluts ‘R’ Us!


Joey, are you sure?

Yeah! All right—Look, I know sometimes it’ll be hard, okay? But, it’ll also be really…really great. Please Rachel! I-I-I really want you to stay.

I want me to stay too.


You gonna tell her?

Nope... (Monica walks in) Hey... so I'm gonna...   put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should   use these plates again for a looong time.

monica was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


But hey, it's courtside. The cheerleaders are going to be right    in fr. . . (Pause) That's not the way to convince you.


(to Ross) So, er... how did it go with Celia?


Yes, every single one of them.

Phoebe, you're gonna be with your grandma?

Yes, and her boyfriend. But we're celebrating Thanksgiving in December 'cause he is lunar.

So you're free Thursday, then.

Yeah. Oh, can I come?

Yeah. Rach, are you thinking you're gonna make it to Vail?


Yes! And he said really mean things that were only partly true.

Joey, please don’t do that. I think it’s best that we just forget about it.


Nah, Phoebs, that's the guy that comes in the frame.

No it isn't, this is my dad, alright, I'll show you.

Phoebe, I thought your dad was in prison.

No, that's my stepdad. My real dad's the one that ran out on us before I was born.

How have you never been on Oprah?

[showing her pictures] OK, look, see, this is him. My mother gave me this picture before she died, same guy.


I know, but don’t you think the sick thing is way better than the play thing?


Is this because I come over here without knocking and eat your food? (Walks towards the fridge) Because I can stop doing that, (looks at the fridge) I really, really think I can!

(goes towards Joey) You know that's not the reason Joe. (Joey hugs him and after, he takes something from the fridge and puts it in his mouth. He goes back to where he was standing before)

joey was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


: Well, I'm not proud of it, but, you know… sometimes when I was living on the street and I needed money for food and stuff I…

) Phoebe, that is awful!

: Well, ok, I wasn't rich like you guys, ok, I didn't eat gold and have a flying pony… I had a hard life, my mother was killed by a drug dealer…


What?! Why? Joey you were so ready for it!

Yeah, I thought so too but, she said the casting people had some problems with me.


And the Irish guy wins the joke!

How crazy that we’d run into you!


I can’t! I spent so much money on them and I told Chandler that I’d wear them all the time, I just can’t give them away!

(spinning around looking for him) I don’t think you did a very thorough job!


So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?! Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker?

He didn’t ask me to marry him.


Excellent! Let’s play Bamboozled! Chandler, you’ll go first. What is the capital of Columbia?


OK honey, you're dating Ross.


(to Monica) I mean is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex?


Ross, it's too hard.

No, no, no... why, because it might get weird for everyone else? Who cares about them. This is about us. Look, I-I've been in love with you since, like, the ninth grade.

Ross, you're like my best friend.

If we broke up, and I lost you...

Whoa, whoa, whoa. What makes you think we're gonna break up?


Yeah, I mean... I think when it's your shot, y'know, you-you know it's your shot. Did it... feel like your shot..?


Oh that’s right, that’s what I’d sound like if I exploded.

Woo-Hoo! The curse is broken! I called everybody I know, and everyone is alive.

Ugly Naked Guy looks awfully still. (Phoebe runs to the window and gasps.)

joey addressed phoebe, not monica (ground truth)


Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]

And what?! Did you sleep with her?!

No! No! No! I just kissed her.


Hey Ross, is uh, is Staten Island really an island?

(he catches the ball and pauses, staring at Joey in disbelief) Also an island.

Hey, what time is it?

Wow! You realize that we've been throwing this ball, without dropping it, for like an hour?


Oh no! Did you take my bra too?!

The pink one with the flowers?!

You mean the one that you’re wearing? (Adjusts Monica’s pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)

Sounds about right.

What is this?

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


I can't kiss anyone.

So I'm kissing everyone?


Are you sure she’s in the cat, or have you been taking your grandma’s glycoma medicine again?

No Dr. Skeptismo! I’m sure. First of all, okay, there’s the feeling. (Chandler shrugs) Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into my guitar case which is lined with orange felt. (Rachel nods her head in unsure agreement) My Mother’s favourite fish is Orange Roughy... (Joey thinks he understands, but then nods that he has no clue.) Cats....like....fish! (Ross and Rachel are totally lost) (to the cat) Hi, Mommy. (Rachel covers her mouth, in an “Oh my God.” gesture) Oh, I haven’t seen this smile in 17 years!

phoebe addressed rachel, not ross (ground truth)


are stealing her thunder. (To Monica) Which we are not!

Well, we’re still talking about it, aren’t we?

Monica-Monica-Monica-Monica, listen-listen, listen, listen, would-would it make you feel better if we all stop talking about Ross and Rachel.

Yes that would be lovely.

You got it. Okay. Now, I can pass for 19 right?!


Ross! Stop that!

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Yeah, I think that fifth shower actually got the interview off me.

Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent.

Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.

No no no, if I couldn't pay you back right away then I'd feel guilty and tense every time I saw you.


No, I'm sorry.

Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay withher and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to getmarried, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."

I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like acomplete nightmare.


Ooh, chocolates on the pillows! I love that!

Come here. (He does, and they kiss.) Okay, be right back.

Oh yes! Monica, get in here! There's a high-speed car chase on!

We're switching rooms.

(looks at what she's holding and shies away) Oh dear God, they gave us glasses!

No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?


I'm sorry, my pie was, was in your hood. Now I just have to get the coffee out of that guy's pants and I'll be back in the hospital by 7. [swats at an imaginary insect by his head, guy leaves promptly]


Stop it! I will kill you. I hate the fact that my room is so small.


Well last night, I met Monica’s.

Yeah, I had a date with this guy, and I swear to God, he is her other half.


No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; that’s not fair! Okay look, I have an idea. Why don’t we, why don’t we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. And then whoever does gets the phone.

Ohh, I lost my mom to suicide.

Okay no way, you cannot use that to get the cute guy and the last blueberry muffin.


(to Chandler and Monica) Well, what is going on with you  two?


Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!


are! Yeah, there's Ross and Joey and you and me. (She picks up a magic marker and draws herself in. Monica can't watch.)

monica was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Huh. So now, the real question is, who put those fossils there, and why?

Hey, look at this. "My Big Book of Grievances."


Just let her serve the beef-custard thing?

Yeah, it’ll be like a funny Thanksgiving story!


Hi! I just wanna-(sees Monica)-Ahhh!!! Oh my God! (She runs out in horror.) Oh my God!

(pulling on a robe) Okay, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I-I-I was um, I was taking a nap.

position. Oh God Monica, tell me you were waiting for a guy! Please tell me you were waiting for a guy!

Yes. Yes, I was. A guy. From work. (Thinks) I'm seeing a guy from work! Ha!

(Gasps) That cute waiter guy from your restaurant, the one that looks like a non-threatening Ray Liotta?


Ok, ok, ok. Ooh, hey 'new doc on the block, Days of Our Lives' Joey Tribbiani.' Ooh, cool picture.

Ooh, I look good.


And you know, I have a massage client soon.

You guys, just please.. a little bit longer. I promise, Rachel will be    back with the cake any minute. Monica, remember.. the frosting? huh?

monica was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


So Joey I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for the wedding, do you need one?

No, I’m performing the ceremony. I’m not wearing a tux.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh, Ross, I’m sorry. I completely ruined your evening.


(sarcastic) Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?


Well uh…I think I want to take Chandler.


On three, 1…2…3! (Rachel turns her head on three to avoid the drops.) Now my pillow's all wet! (She was trying to fool Rachel and squeezed the eyedropper.)

Well, well, you said it was practice!

Then why did you move?!

Because I knew you were lying!

All right, come here! (She gets up and drags Rachel off of the couch by her legs.)


Joey, I figured you’d understand. I mean, I-I’ve known him a lot longer.

Come on Ross! Look, I-I don’t have any brothers; I’ll never get to be a best man!

(pause) I’ll never get to be a best man!


Yeah! Oh yeah, you’ll be fine! It-it’ll be uh, just like bungy jumping. Y’know? But instead of bouncing back up you-you won’t.


I have no idea.

Yeah! I’m just pretending to watch the game so I don’t have to help out with stuff.


Joey, why wouldn't you invite us to your parties?

joey was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


That's, that's nice twice!

Rachel, what's going on? I mean isn't this the same Barry who you left at the altar?

Yeah, but it was different with him today! And he wasn't, like, Orthodontist Guy, y'know? I mean, we had fun! Is there anything wrong with that?


Any chance you think the couch looks good there?


(getting up) Oh, for gods sake, Judy, pick up the sock! Pick  up the sock! Pick up the sock! (everybody scared) Im sorry, was that rude?  Di-did my, my li-little outburst blunt (?) the hideousness (?) that is this  evening? Look, I know, you all have a lot going on, but all I wanted to do was  have dinner with my friends on my birthday. And you are all so late and you  didnt even have the courtesy to call. (her cellular rings) Well, its too late  now.


Yes it's true.

Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day?


No way. I've been going to the guy for 12 years.


Uh-huh, doing it. Doing it. Phone doing it.

Oh! Oh, I can't believe it! I mean I think it's great! For him. She might be able to do better.


Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. [Joey walks in behind Chandler]


They’re not gonna swallow anything, you guys are being way over protective. When I was a kid, my mom used to just throw me into a pile of broken glass!


Ok, ok, ok. Ooh, hey 'new doc on the block, Days of Our Lives' Joey Tribbiani.' Ooh, cool picture.

Ooh, I look good.

Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'

Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?

Huh? Never really thought about the writers. The scripts just kinda come to my house. But you know what? This makes me look good, which makes the show look good, which makes the writers look good so how could they be mad about that?


Still on Amelia Earhart?

The woman just vanished!

Seriously, Ross, you don't want in on this?

joey addressed ross, not chandler (ground truth)


How’d the lecture go?


Phoebe, it's me. I'm going to hunt you down and kill you!

You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends.

I don't care! This guy is a nightmare!

Oh, right, so he gets a little crazy when he's stoned.


Excuse me, sir. Hi, you come in here all time. I was just wondering, do you think there's a possibility that you could give me an advance on my tips?

Ok, ok, that's fine. Fine. Hey, I'm sorry about that spill before. (picks up the tip he leaves) Only $98.50 to go.

Hey. Ross, did you know Mom and Dad are going to Puerto Rico for Thanksgiving?

No, they're not.

Yes, they are. The Blymens invited them.

I am not wrong.

No, I just talked to them.


(to Phoebe) It's like a giant hug.

Ross, how about you. What would you give up, sex or food?

phoebe addressed ross, not chandler (ground truth)


I'd wanna rip his tiny little head off. Fortunately, I'm past it.

Phoebe, you do seem a little tense. Here, let me help you.

Oh! Get off!! Ow!! Oh, stop it!! Why?! Why are you doing that to me?!

What are you talking about?

As a masseuse and a human, I'm begging you, never do that to anyone!


Phoebe, I think... It's just too weird, I just saw a one year old running around with pantyhose on!

Oh, I know, we should have been more prepared. (she looks around) It's okay. Now, the way I see it, our real competition now is Cameron. Oh my God, they just took her sweater off. Look at those arms! Hello Michelin Man.

Oh, Phoebe! Come on! You know what, it's already three o'clock and they haven't even gotten to Emma's group yet. We gotta go, we got dinner!

(panicking) But Emma's got what it takes, she could go all the way!

Phoebe, you have to calm down.


Oh really! Where? Somewhere funny I'd bet! (Chandler is straining to keep quiet as Phoebe enters.)

Hornswoggle? (To Chandler) Ooh, this must be killing you.

See ya! All right Pheebs, I am ready for my first lesson.


Thanks, Gunther. (takes the plate Gunther serves him and Rachel comes up and kisses him) (to Rachel) Hey! (to Gunther) Umm, can I get a napkin too?

Phoebe, your in pain, would you just go to the dentist, just go.


Oh, I am no women, but that is one tasty dish. (Phoebe walks in.)

phoebe was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Then you're gonna have to watch it for me.

Just for a few seconds, so I can know what it is...    Please?


So how many more do you have tomorrow?


Look, I don't care it starts at eight, we can't be late.

Look, our table is down in front, okay, my boss is gonna be there, everyone will see if we arrive after it starts.


Yeah, the Knicks rule!

Joey, this is you!

Let me see. (goes over and looks at the form) Oh, right.


The young hot ball and chain.

(checking her watch) Op! We gotta go! (The girls stand up.)

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


to be the remains of a Paleozoic Amphibian in its jaws! How did it get there?!


have a boyfriend. There’s a guy in one of my classes who-who has a crush on me.

Yeah! I don’t know. I mean, last year Elizabeth now-now this kid. What-what-what-what is it?! Am I giving out some kind of…sexy professor vibe? (Rachel and Joey both look at him.)

Not right now.

It-it—The point is my natural charisma has made him fail his midterm.

Oh, see now I feel bad for the kid! I had a crush on a teacher once and it was so hard! Y’know you—I couldn’t concentrate and I blushed every time he looked at me. I mean come on, you remember what’s it’s like to be 19 and in love.


Let me see that.

This one right here. (Ross whines.)


(entering from her room) Hey, guess what I'm doing this weekend! I'm going to this culinary fair in New Jersey.


When you were reading the dirty magazines without taking off the plastic!

(to Ross) I'll show you how.


Wow! Hey, why are you all dressed up?

Rachel and I are bringing Emma to Ralph Lauren today to introduce her to everyone. Doesn't she look cute?

Well, because if one more person says "what a cute little boy" I'm gonna whip them with a car antenna!


Oh no-no-no, no more offers. You can’t offer anything to us!

Let us keep the apartment and…

As a thank you, Rachel and I will kiss for one minute.

monica addressed rachel, not chandler (ground truth)


Oh yeah, she can't be herself.

Okay, so... allright... Which dress? (she holds up    two 'Phoebe' dresses, Rachel and Monica look at them... taking their time, don't    wanting to hurt Phoebe) You can say "neither".

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Oh my God!

Ross, why didn’t you tell me that?

Eh, ‘cause I knew that if I told you, you’d make me go, and I knew you needed someone to be with you tonight. Come on. Come on.

I cannot believe you.


I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.

Oh, hi! I would check your hand but... I'm sure you don't want to get my chicken disease!


Didn't it like totally speak to you?

Woah, woah, woah, what book is this?


(entering) Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.


Why are you reading this? You hate this kind of stuff.


that she put me in charge of cups and ice.

Y'know I rued the day once…didn't get a whole lot else done.


So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. (he tries to take a cookie but Monica slaps his hand)

These are for Erica!

Well, I want he baby to come out all cute and fat!


I don’t know, I don’t know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should take a break.

Okay, okay, fine, you’re right. Let’s ah, let’s take a break, (goes to the door) let’s cool off, okay, let’s get some frozen yogart, or something.. (opens the door)


So how many more do you have tomorrow?

Two. This photographer, who seemed really dull. And this actor guy, who I’m not sure about, because when he called and I answered the phone ‘Chandler Bing,’ he said ‘Whoa-whoa, short message.’


You gonna tell her?

Nope... (Monica walks in) Hey... so I'm gonna...   put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should   use these plates again for a looong time.

chandler addressed monica, not phoebe (ground truth)


Oh, come on. What was with that whole Black Bart speech? (mimicking) "When I play poker, I'm not a nice guy!"

No, I don't think so, see Ross, because I think you love her.

ross was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Ok Ross, just so you know, calling it a poopie diaper doesn't make this process any cuter.

Come on up. I'm gonna get the rest of his stuff together. [walks in his room]

Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can. [finishes the diaper] There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.

I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just say hi? Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Ben just said 'Hi'.

Ye-, no, my Uncle Hi.


Ugh, I just gotta get the thing back!

That sketch you mentioned? Might it have looked a little something like this? (He shows her what he’s been drawing.)


Well you sure used a large font.

Eh, yeah, well ah, waitress at a coffee shop and cheer squad co-captain only took up so much room.

Hey-hey-hey that’s funny! Your funny Chandler! Your a funny guy! You wanna know what else is really funny?!

rachel addressed chandler, not ross (ground truth)


No, come on Ross! (He grabs his bag so he can’t leave) Look, Ross, we have to get past this.

Give me the bag.

No, look, I don’t know what else to do. I said I’m sorry!


Yeah. Y’know umm, uh, umm, about that, umm, Ross I really appreciate your offer to let me move in and everything, but don’t you think it’s gonna be weird?

Wh-why?! Why-why-why would it, why would it be weird?

Well, because of us! Because of our history.


Mon, maybe one of these guys wants to wear your dress.

(in a manly voice) I’m gonna go shave. (Gets up.)

(in a manly voice) Yeah well, I’m gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)

Oh, I have to pee. If I don’t come out in five minutes it’s because I’ve choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)


(in his British accent) I’m sorry, I’ve got plans with my sister.


Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we are shooting tomorrow...

Joey, is this that thing that you do when you say you're bad so I'll give you a compliment?


Um, well, I was going to, I-I-I really was. But um, then somewhere, just out of nowhere, I didn’t.

Why haven’t you told them?! Wouldn’t they be happy?!


Uh, if I were omnipotent for a day, I'd..


Chandler! (Knocks on the door.) Chandler! I just figured out who you are!

Can you figure out what I’m doing?


Why am I not surprised?

Y’know what Ross? I’m not gonna let you get away with this!

I don’t think you have much choice.


I can’t believe they-they didn’t even tell us!

in the attic!


Where the hell are Joey and Molly? I asked you to watch them.

So you see, Molly, what people don't understand is that acting is a discipline.    It takes a lot of hard work.


That ring? When my grandmother first came to this country, that ring and the clothes on her back were all she had with her.

So you might say, the ring is irreplaceable? (Gives Joey a little squeeze.)

chandler addressed joey, not ross (ground truth)


(yelling in pain) I know nothing! Mike’s a great guy, it was hypothetical!


Hey Joey, how'd the audition go?

Incredible! I met the director this time and you'll never believe who it was.


(grabbing the picture) Give me that!

All right, wait! Just wait. Everybody just calm down. Okay? Let's give our friend Joey a chance to explain why he's such a big pervert!

phoebe addressed joey, not monica (ground truth)


Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by the peacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he was moving in. (Monica gestures at Phoebe to shut up; Joey looks surprised but pleased) Looks like I was second to last.

(to Ross) This is just Bactine. It won't hurt.

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Ross, are you okay?

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


(To Chandler) You told her!

Nancy Thompson’s getting fired! (Monica slaps him on the shoulder.)

chandler addressed monica, not ross (ground truth)


I have to tell you this story. Okay, I was coming over here and this driver…

(interrupting) Was his name Angus? (Monica and Chandler laugh.)

Wait, what that place, that pub he took us too?


And thank you, for that.

But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was never very good at the flirting thing.

What? (Mumbles) What-what, what are talking about? It-it worked with you.


Carol, what's the matter? What happened?

My parents called this afternoon to say they weren't coming.

Oh my god.

I mean, I knew they were having trouble with this whole thing, but they're myparents. They're supposed to give me away and everything.


Look guys, when I’m with her it’s-it’s-it’s like she brings this-this-this great side out of me. I mean I-I-I love her, y’know?

And I love the milk! But, I’m not gonna some British girl to move in with me! (Realizes that made no sense.) Joey, you say things now.

All right look, Ross, he’s right. Emily’s great, she’s great! But this way too soon, you’re only gonna scare her!

No! You don’t want to wreck it, you don’t want to go to fast!


I don’t have any issues with my Father.

Okay, so it’s probably just the Ross thing then.

So Rachel called. Wants to see me. Going over in a minute.

Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realises that life without me.... a-sucks.


Chandler! He’s your father; he should be at the wedding.

I don’t even know the man. Okay? We’re not the close. I haven’t seen him in years.

Well what are you gonna do when he finds out he wasn’t even asked?!


I’m gonna go across the hall to check on the yams.


We were playing a game.

Ew, was Chandler naked? Sort of like a, like a ring toss kind of situation?

chandler was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!

feel your ears?


(interrupting) Can I ask you just a little question, huh? Why tonight?

See, I’ve been waiting my whole life to be engaged, and unlike some people I’m only planning on doing this once. So, uh y’know, maybe this is selfish and I’m sorry about it, but I was kinda hoping tonight could just be about that.

No it’s not! No! No! Now it’s about you and Ross getting back together!


In the hospital.

No I left the diapers at the hospital! There’s some in the bag but I’ll run out and get some more.

Alright thanks, oh Ross could you stop by the coffee house and get me a muffin?

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


(entering) Look, I really need some help, okay? Why? Why did I have to speak in a British accent?! What do I do?

Why don’t you phase it out? Yeah, fade the accent out and people will think you’re, y’know, that you’re adjusting to life in America.


Joey, I’m not worried about her! I’m worried about my baby! Whoever she dates my baby dates! Now-now where is this (makes the quote-marks sign) actor taking them?

Hey! I’m an (does the quote-marks thing as well) actor too! I’m not sure. I think they’re taking the ferry out to some Italian place on Staten Island.


Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here?

Uhh, yes I did but there isn't. Okay, here we go.

Okay, go left. Left! Left! (The bottom of the couch is hitting the railing.)


(sighs) Honey, I wish you would get over her. I hate seeing you like this. Is there anything I can do for you? Do you want to look down my top?

gunther did not speak next (ground truth)


Gunther have you uh, have you seen Chandler?

No. No, I haven’t seen him.

He’s getting married tomorrow right?

Yes. Yes. Don’t worry. Everything’s fine. We’ll uh, we’ll see you tomorrow at the wedding.


Yes, I want to change. And why-why don’t you go down and get us a table?


Rachel, what're you gonna say to him?

I-I-I don't know.


Well, uh y’know, our guy works with Chandler and he’s really nice and smart and he’s a great dresser!

No, our guy is just a floating head.

You’re not supposed to look!


I can't believe it. Paolo kissed my mom?

Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.

ross addressed joey, not chandler (ground truth)


Then why-why is she going to a play?!

Uh, y’know, starve a fever, go to a play for a cold.


Chandler, why would you do that?

Well y’know, they only give you three letters, so after A-S-S it  is a bit of a challenge.

It is when you put it together with that one.


Oops, sorry. Listen, we-we have to have a party tonight! Actually, we have to have one in five minutes, so everybody cancel your plans.

What are you talking about?

We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But it’s actually for Joshua. (Starts handing out party hats.) Look, he said he’s not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him! (Hands Ross a party hat.)

Well, as much as I’d like to meet Josh and warn him, Emily and I aren’t going to be here. All right? I mean, she’s going to come by first to say good-bye, and then I’ve got a whole special evening planned. So I’m sorry, no party.


Oh, you must stop shooping.

Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff.

Chandler, will you just come in already?

No, I prefer to keep a safe distance from all this merriment.


Monica, I was wondering if you can make me some of that righteous mac and cheese like last year.

monica was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff.

joey addressed chandler, not rachel (ground truth)


So I don't have to sing and I can just sit there and pass  judgments on others?


No, I gotta wear this thing for a couple weeks. (points to the sling he is wearing)

Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?

Nooo. I had a story all worked out but then Chandler sold me out.


Great! Okay, if you’ll just excuse me. (To the guy) So, did you hear something you liked?


Fajitas! Be careful, very hot plate, very hot plate!!

Ross, you don't even have oven mitts on!

That is gonna hurt tomorrow!

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Even Mary Tyler Moore would've been better.

I like it. I do, I think it's a Ten. (Chandler laughs.)

ross addressed chandler, not monica (ground truth)


This is your cellphone?


Okay Ross, can I uh, can I ask you something?

I know, I know it was stupid.

Are you kidding?! With the, with the lilies, and-and the song, and the stars! It was…really wonderful! Did you just make that up?

No, actually I thought about it when, when we were going out. It’s how I imagined I uh, I would ask you to marry me.


Yeah. Y’know umm, uh, umm, about that, umm, Ross I really appreciate your offer to let me move in and everything, but don’t you think it’s gonna be weird?

Wh-why?! Why-why-why would it, why would it be weird?

Well, because of us! Because of our history.

No! No! It would be weird if we were still in that place, I mean are you still in that place?

No! Not at all!

Good! Me neither! So it’s not a problem. We’re just two friends who happen to be roommates.

Okay, but Ross, eventually you and I are gonna be dating.


Ugh, Monica I don’t want to steal your stupid thunder!

Oh please! Why else would you have made out with Ross?!

All right, easy mimey, the moment has passed, it ain’t gonna happen!

I just thought it would be nice if I could have just this one night!

I swear, I never wanted any part of your night!

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Well, he makes t-shirts for a living, and he thought it would be       appropriate to give me this.


And this goes for all guys?

All guys that are awake. Then we go to sleep and then all the guys from the other end of the world wake up and behave the exact same way.


Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadn’t been on the toilet.

Hey! So Chandler, wanna go to the coffeehouse?

chandler was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Chandler! He’s your father; he should be at the wedding.

I don’t even know the man. Okay? We’re not the close. I haven’t seen him in years.


I know, what about Rachel? I mean how are we even gonna ask her?

You guys are unbelievable. No! He cannot come.


(quietly) Bye, fat ass.

ALL RIGHT!! Phoebe now come on! Will you please tell me what it is I did that mad you so mad at me!

phoebe was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


(on phone) Oh that’s great! Good for you.

Okay! So yeah, maybe we can get together umm… (Joey mimes throwing something in the air, catching it, rolling it out, putting it in an oven and cutting it.) Can you hold for one second please? (To Joey) What?!

When you’re off the phone, do you wanna get a pizza?

(on phone) Hi! I’m back. (Goes to hang up the phone.) Yeah, that sounds great. (Listens) Okay. Well, we’ll do it then. (Listens) Okay, bye-bye. (He hangs up the phone and turns around to see Joey standing close to him and screams.)

Hey listen, so when’s-when’s my audition? I mean I know it’s Thursday, but what time?

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Ross, I swear, I don’t know.

Oh, come on, you know it’s a girl!

You really didn’t know?


Okay, there’s this guy, Warren, from the museum and he’s going on a dig for like two years and he’s got this great place he needs to sublet. So uh, you interested?

That sounds great! I’d love to live at Warren’s!! I love Warren! Thank you!

Don’t thank me! If you wanna thank something, thank the volcano that erupted thousands of years ago, killing but perfectly preserving an entire civilization. (Rachel just looks at him.) Here’s Warren’s number.

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Wait a minute, look.


No, we only went out once.

You dated her!

All right, well why don’t I go out with an ex-boyfriend and do Joey a favor?!

Hey, you wanna do Joey a favor, maybe you go out with Joey. (He turns around to see Chandler glaring at him.)


Okay. All right, that's true! But y'know I just don't embarrass that easily.

What?! You totally get embarrassed!


You know what, I'm sure your wish is gonna come true, but, you guys - just in case, maybe a genie will come out if we rub this lamp! (rubs lamp, stops because it's very hot) Ah!! That thing gets hot!!

You know, Ross, just keep making your jokes. How are you gonna feel if we actually do win?


Ooh, this is cool...it says in some parts of the world, people actually eat the placenta. (Joey grimaces)

joey was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


No hey Rach, it’s cool okay? Y’know I’m a loner too! (Heads for his room.) Right?

Hey Joey, y’know what? You are way to good for her.


(to Rachel) And you… Ross, I believe, if you check Rachel’s bag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.

(He does so, and finds a half-eaten box of cookies.) You’re good. (Tries a cookie.) These are not.


Not it! Damn it!

Rachel, this is yours.

Aah! Why? What are these for?


Joey, she’s so cool. She speaks four languages.

know what guys want!

My beers?! Look you guys, she’s a very nice girl. Okay? We had a good time, but I just—I don’t see it going anywhere.


(entering) What's going on?

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Why would I eat my own arm?


(waving) Very funny Ross! Very life-like and funny. Okay. (Notices that a woman is waving back.) Oh no-no-no, I wasn't waving at you lady. (She just stares at him.) (Joey sees how beautiful she is.) Whoa, maybe I was! Hey, Monica, this totally hot girl in Ross's building is flirting with me.

monica was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


She went on one of those spray-on tan places.


I don’t think so.

Can I please be there when you tell her? (Joey nods yes.)

joey was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


. (Joey  enters.) I’ll call you back.

Who was that?

It’s just the pizza place.

You hung up on the pizza place? I don’t hang up on your friends.

I’m sorry honey, I’m just having a, having a rough day.

Oh you really, you really just don’t want to hear about it.


Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he   knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant. (Joey like   stands at attention with his chest forward and his hands on his sides, looking   up at the ceiling with his lips pouted.) That's not nonchalant!

No idea what it means.

Oh... okay, just hide!


Joey you broke my chair!!

joey was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Who cares?! I-I’ll make payments, whatever it takes, I want the Mr. Bowmont!!

Oh my God, you’re back!

Ohh, let me see it! Let me see your hand! (Chandler is frantically trying to wave them off.)


Oh! Got ‘em right here, (Pats his coat pocket) check!

It’s all London, baby! Here we go. (He takes a picture of a less than enthused Chandler and starts towards the girls’ apartment.)

You got your passport?

Yeah, in my third drawer on my dresser. You don’t want to lose that.


I'm hurt! I'm actually hurt, that you would think that I would send you any of those things out of any thing other than love. Hurt! Hurt!

All right Ross!! I get it!!

...can't, can't a guy send a barbershop quartet to his girlfriend's office anymorrrrre!!

Oh, please, Ross it was so obvious! It was like you were marking your territory. I mean you might have well have just come in and peed all around my desk!

I would never do that!

Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do.

Yeah well if, if, if Mark said that, than Mark's an idiot.


She’s just doing her job!

(sitting at the kitchen table with his back to the TV) You sick bastards!

Oh, it’s a tattoo! That’s weird, Phoebe doesn’t… Wait that’s Ursula! That’s not Phoebe that is Ursula!

rachel addressed phoebe, not chandler (ground truth)


Yes I do! And we’re gonna go out, we’re gonna have a good time,  and take your mind off of childbirth and c-sections and-and giant baby heads stretching  out…

No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked off  all of your top scores, how sad.

phoebe addressed monica, not joey (ground truth)


Alright. Just keep him away from me.


He's planning your birthday party.


Rachel is one of my closest friends. (Pause) Although, being the only one who knows anything about this does makes me feel special. Okay!

(to the driver) Okay, stop-stop! Phoebe?!


(into receiver)Hello? Hey Charlie, what do you know?

Chandler is supposed to find out if he's getting an assistent job at his ad agency. But out of the 15 interns, they are only hiring three.

One of the slots got filled.

Sense the tone! No that kid Nate got it.

Oh! I hate that guy! I mean come on kid! Pull up your pants!


Let’s just say I took care of it.


: What's your news?

: You know, if I didn't already have a job, I think, I would have been really good in advertising.

: Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?"

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Well, we're talking about sperm donors and Zack may be the guy! I mean, look, he's intelligent, he's healthy, he's athletic, I mean, he is "spermtastic"!

Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!

chandler was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!


Hey, why don’t you guys go, get portraits done by a professional photographer.


Hey Chandler, why so fancy?

Well, I got a job interview. It’s kinda a big deal too. Its a lot more money and I’d be doing data reconfiguration and statistical factoring.


Okay. (Joey tries to take the guitar.) Oh no-no-no, you don't touch the guitar! First you learn here, (Points to her head.) then you learn here. (Points to the guitar.)


messing with us! But see they don't know that we know that they know! So…


Huh? So whaddya think? Casa de Joey. Huh? I decorated it myself.


A date?! No, no Pheebs you-you must be mistaken, because I know you wouldn’t schedule a date on the same night you have plans with a friend!

Come on Joey, don’t make me feel badly about this.

No, I’m gonna!! That’s right! Yeah, you made me feel really guilty about goin’ out with that girl! Like-like-like I did something terrible to you! And now Pheebs, you’re doing the same thing!

different! This is with David! Remember David, the scientist guy? Okay, he’s very special to me.

Okay, well my girl from the other night was special. She was a scientist too!

Well, she graduated from high school!

Okay, whatever. Y’know what? I don’t have time have time to convince you because he’s only here for four hours, and I’m gonna go see him! (Gets up and leaves.)

(to the waiter) What are you still doin’ here?! I told you, lobster ravioli!


Hey, Joey! Hey! Ooh! Ooh! I just say someone on the—that looks just like you on the subway. And I was gonna go over and say ‘hi!’ but then I figured, he doesn’t care if he looks like you.

That just cost me four bucks. But uh listen, I just called to see how the chick and the duck are doing?


Oh, that is so unfortunate.

Cute naked guy is really starting to put on weight.


What? No, I'm taking Monica to a romantic inn in Vermont (shows them a brochure)!

Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!

Are you really that busy?

Oh, that's ok.I'll just try and reschedule. (on the phone) "Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there and I need to change it (pause) Oh, what do you mean it's not refundable? Can I just come some other time? (pause) Oh, can't you make an exception?"


Rachel you have to read this book. It's called <i>Be Your Own Windkeeper</i>. It's about how women need to become more empowered.

Well that sounds kinda cool, kinda like <i>The Hobbit</i>.

It is nothing like the Hobbit. It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had, except for Richard.


Have you guys picked a date yet?

Oh no, not yet.


Oh, well he's yummy. We did a little kissin'.

Phoebe, what are you doing?

phoebe was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Is that why you wanted to tie my tie?


Okay, I'm gonna go too!

Oh please, you are not gonna ditch again like you did with London.


You're gonna put on sweats and clean, aren't you?

It's gonna be so hot! (She kisses him.)

Thanks. (Joey and Chandler exit to the hall. Joey pulls out the tickets    and hands one to Chandler.) Here's your ticket.

Hey, listen. I'm never going to lie to you again, okay? And I want    you to know that nobody thinks you're stupid.


Please ... if I win the lottery, you guys are not gonna leave me. Someone gave me a basket of mini-muffins last week and I couldn't get rid of you for 3 days!


Monica, hey, can I borrow the Porsche?

But ehm...what is it not?

(abashed) A place to entertain my lady friends.

And what else is it not?

(even more abashed) A place to eat spaghetti.


Joey, (nervously) where did you learn that word?


So tell me, what are Joey Tribbiani’s end of the night moves?

Ah, well, if I want the girl to kiss me, first thing I do is make my lips  look irresistible.


Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!

Oh well, you're timing couldn't be better. I am putting out fires all over the place.

to tell you something!

What-what is it, what is it?


Okay, dime! (Donates that.) You guys should probably keep talking; this could take a while. (Finds something else.) Oh no, wait! Look it! Whoa! (Looks at it.) Oh my God, this is a police badge!

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh, great, pretty soon they'll be back together.

By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny       Mexico. (BEAT) Oh, wait, that's the end of a different plan.

She's asleep. Chandler?

Emma was doing it!

Ooh, she's asleep, that means we can...

Yes, but we have to be fast.

(laughs) Okay, I'll try. And you can't make any noise.


(to Janice) Okay. (to Joey) Joey, trade lives with me!


Okay. Then he still has this huge decision to make. Now he’s walking around thinking, ‘Do I want to be a dad?’ and then bam!


You’re just so mean to each other! And I don’t want to end up like that with Rachel. I still like you!


Thanks, Gunther. (takes the plate Gunther serves him and Rachel comes up and kisses him) (to Rachel) Hey! (to Gunther) Umm, can I get a napkin too?

Phoebe, your in pain, would you just go to the dentist, just go.


Wow Pheebs, you speak Italian?

I guess so. (See, the brief possession didn't affect her at all, like we could really tell.)


Chandler, I can't be playing games, Ross is gonna be home soon. And I have to write five whole pages if I'm gonna stick to his schedule.

Well, so, play for the next 30 minutes and then write until he gets home.

(jumping up) All right! But uh, listen, what do you say we crank it up a notch?

All right, all we need is a little lighter fluid.

Okay, but be careful okay, because I wanna get our security deposit back.

Yeah, I think we said good-bye to that when we invented hammer darts.

Do you even remember which part of the wall is not spackle?


Phoebe if it helps Alexandra has only been massaging Monica for like three years. (Phoebe rolls her eyes and walks away and Monica glares at him.) If! I said, "If it helps!" (Goes to the bedroom.)

monica was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


How's the maniac?

Oh, well he's yummy. We did a little kissin'.

Phoebe, what are you doing?

Oh, no, no, no, no. You know what, he's not into that stuff anymore. He quit for me.


Ohh! Ohh! In college, Chandler got drunk and slept with the lady who cleaned our dorm!

chandler was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Oh umm, my big scene is coming up. Big scene coming up.

If you said, "Big lima bean, bubbling up." Would she understand the difference?

(noticing Rachel crawling behind the couch) Rach? What are you doing?

monica addressed rachel, not chandler (ground truth)


(To Monica) Have I got a surprise for you? Pack your bags!

Oh no!You guys aren't supposed to get divorced for 7 years!

What? No, I'm taking Monica to a romantic inn in Vermont (shows them a brochure)!

Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!

Are you really that busy?

Oh, that's ok.I'll just try and reschedule. (on the phone) "Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there and I need to change it (pause) Oh, what do you mean it's not refundable? Can I just come some other time? (pause) Oh, can't you make an exception?"


I’ve got canned goods.


Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!

Hey, you guys!


Phoebe, it's me. I'm going to hunt you down and kill you!


Oh relax man, relax. You’re looking a little flushed.

(To Monica) Hey-hey-hey, I think we might find out the answer to our question.

Monica and I were talking about who could kick whose ass in a fight, you or Ross?

joey addressed monica, not chandler (ground truth)


Oh, all right. (Joey flips the coin.) Tails! (The coin bounces off of the landing above them and falls to the ground.) Can you-can you see what it is?

joey was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, come on, what. You took his underwear?

He took my essence!

Okay, now hold on. Joey, why, why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now?

Because, I'm not wearing any underwear now.

Okay, then why do you have to wear underwear tonight?

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Hey Rach listen, no matter what this guy says I want you to know you’re not gonna be alone in this.

Listen I uh… (He takes her hand.) It’s a scary world out there especially if you’re a single mom. Y’know, I always felt like you and I have this-this special bond. Y’know? So, (gets down on one knee again) Rachel Green will you marry me?

No! Joey, oh you’re so sweet. You’re so-so sweet, honey. But I’m not, I’m not looking for a husband.


Ooh, this is cool...it says in some parts of the world, people actually eat the placenta. (Joey grimaces)

Hey Ross, listen, you know that right now, your baby's only this big? (measures about 2 inches with his thumb and index finger) This is your baby. (in baby-like voice) Hi Daddy!


Oh, I know. Hey, y’know what we never did? (Ross looks at her.) Oh no, not that. (Ross nods okay.) We uh, we never had bonus night!

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Rachel, what's going on? I mean isn't this the same Barry who you left at the altar?

Yeah, but it was different with him today! And he wasn't, like, Orthodontist Guy, y'know? I mean, we had fun! Is there anything wrong with that?

Okay, how about the fact that he's engaged to another woman, who just happens to be your ex-best friend?


Monica, hey, can I borrow the Porsche?

But ehm...what is it not?


You had to do it, didn’t you? You couldn’t just leave it alone.


(covering his eyes) Dude! That's my sister! (She shows the rest of the gang.)

(grabbing the picture) Give me that!


So it’s okay to date a student.

Well, not really. I mean technically it’s-it’s not against the rules or anything, but it is frowned upon. Especially by that professor we ran into last night, Judgey von Holierthanthou.


Ross, you got that for free from the museum gift shop.


What?! My mom’s not gonna be here?!

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


...Ninety-five, ninety-six, ninety-seven. See,

You got waaaay too much free time.


It still wouldn’t be clean. (Rachel makes an ‘Eww, disgusting!’ face) All I want is my freedom.

Foot rubs for a month!

I’ll take all of your photos and put them into photo albums!

Freedom! I want my freedom! Why won’t you here me?! (Opens the door) Sophie, help me! Help me!! (Sophie stands up)


Oh, I was unbelievable.

All right, Ross!

heard. I mean, there were characters, plot lines, themes, a motif... at one point there were villagers.

Well, ahem... you know, by the time we'd finished with all the dirty talk, it was kinda late... and we were both kind of exhausted, so uh...


I ran into Vlad at the place where they sell the big fish, and he said you played here a lot, so umm....


Are you scared?


Ok, Ross, whats going on here, are we just bringing strange  women back to the apartment now?


No, come on Ross! (He grabs his bag so he can’t leave) Look, Ross, we have to get past this.

Give me the bag.

No, look, I don’t know what else to do. I said I’m sorry!

You should scream at me, or-or-or curse me, or hit me.

I’m not gonna hit you.


Do you know what I was thinkin’?

Nothing, I just like to go like this. (Does it again.)

(entering from the bathrooms) Hey Chandler, what are you doing tonight?

Uh why, do you have a lecture?

Then free as a bird. What’s up?

My dad wanted to know if you wanted to play racquetball with us.


So who's gonna tell them?

Not it! Damn it!

Rachel, this is yours.


Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that he’s got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!

Wow! Nice! Manly and also kind of a slut.

Y’know, I’m beginning to see what Jake was talking about.


So I don't have to sing and I can just sit there and pass  judgments on others?


Let’s just say I took care of it.

Don’t worry! Don’t worry. I just told him, very nicely, "You don’t go buying people’s babies, so back off!!"

No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesn’t want to buy my baby! I made that up!

And you couldn’t think of anything else?!

(To Joey) I can’t believe that you yelled at my boss! I’m-I’m gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!


No! The guy is mean. I mean really mean. I think you should stay away from him.


Laugh all you want but uh, she actually left me a message saying she’d like to go out again.

Yeah in fact, I’m gonna go call her right now. And I’ll make sure to tell her my friend Chandler says… (He mimics the shy reaction Chandler did.)

Uh Joe, when it’s one o’clock in the morning and you don’t come by? That’s okay!


let me nap! Ugh, I’m gonna get cranky!


I just wanted to say that I hope you do have sex tonight and I hope that you guys get back together, but I must warn you, the night that you announce your engagement I’m going to announce that I’m pregnant!


Yeah, I know, he's sweet, but it's just not fun anymore, you know? I don't know if it's me, or his hunger strike, or, I don't know.


Let's see, 1939... yeah, 24, 25?

Looks like a fun gang. (They all look at each other and smile)

Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!

Hey, you guys!


Or maybe it's because this guy's doing so good they wanna put more people on it. (Chandler pours some juice in a glass.) You should see this guy, Chandler, he goes through two bottles a day.

(slides the juice across the counter which Joey catches) What do you care? You're an actor. This is your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything to you.

I know, but, I was the best, you know? I liked being the best. (He downs the glass of juice in one swig.) I don't know. Maybe I should just get outta the game. They need guys up in housewares to serve cheese.


You still on that?

Oh, come on. What was with that whole Black Bart speech? (mimicking) "When I play poker, I'm not a nice guy!"

No, I don't think so, see Ross, because I think you love her.

Um.... no. See, I might've had feelings for her at one time—not any more. I just—I...


Ah, now Rach, these ah, these little women.

How little are they? I mean, are they like scary little?


Ahh, I don’t believe you. I think you don’t want them to see you begging me. (Goes to put the tape in the VCR)

Ah, a little preview!

Fine. Fine, but I want the record to show that I tried to take the high road, because in about five minutes I’m gonna be saying…(He laughs and points at Rachel sarcastically.)

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Umm, she Rach, not it, she.


What are you talking about?


What are you doing? We're going to a hospital.


I do not have baby fever!


Come on up. I'm gonna get the rest of his stuff together. [walks in his room]

Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can. [finishes the diaper] There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.


Yeah, uh-huh, a 100 dollars.

Phoebe! I can't believe you gave them money! I thought you agreed it was totally unreasonable that they asked me for that money!

phoebe was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


(running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!

Well, Chandler and I are in a bar…

ross addressed chandler, not monica (ground truth)


Oh, um, around 802. We ah, talked for a little while, and then um, we went out for an innocent burger.


Hi guys! Listen I really need your help. I think I did something  really stupid.


Oh Joey, I’m so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?

Nah, I’m too depressed to eat. I’ll probably eat in like 5 minutes. So I guess I’ll just fly home with you guys, what time’s your flight?


So you stole that tape from Richard's apartment?


But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!

ross was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


...can't, can't a guy send a barbershop quartet to his girlfriend's office anymorrrrre!!


Phoebe we just saw mine, let me see yours.

Oh OK. [pulls over her shirt and shows a bare shoulder] Oh no, oh it's gone, that's so weird, I don't know how-where it went.

You didn't get it?


Why? ‘Cause otherwise you’d go for it?

What you don’t think I’d go up to her?

Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me.

Yeah, well missy, you better be glad that list is laminated.

You know what honey, you go ahead, we’ll call her an alternate.

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Yes! Yes, I did.

Then do Iceberg!

-sharp? Have you been studying the real names of the chords? (Joey doesn't answer.) Have you? (He looks away in shame.) Oh my God!

What?! I didn't touch a guitar!

No, but you're questioning my method!


(smiling from ear to ear) Well, Gladys say hello to    your new home! (she holds out the 'painting')

(surprised by how ugly it is) Wow! (sarcastic) Oh,    she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh    so proudly? (looks around for a spot)

(sounds desperate, knowing what Rachel is trying to    do) I haven't really settled on a spot yet!

thing that you see when you walk in the door!


What? Hey wait a minute! Phoebe, how do you even know who the father is?

I may play the fool at times, but I’m a little more than a pretty blond girl with an ass that won’t quit. (She takes the sweater out of her purse.) I believe this belongs to the father of your baby.


How you got three women to marry you, I’ll never know.

Hey! Hey, Pheebs, check it out. Yeah, for my desert, I have chosen to make a traditional English truffle!


He can do more than that! He can destroy the universe!

No Chandler, they can swallow one of those little parts! And also, look at his smooth area, that’s just gonna mess them up.

chandler was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Yeah, big stuff.


Chandler, come on nothing even happened!

fall in love with this fantastic woman and it turns out that she wanted you first!

Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for the rest of her life! You’re so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there! Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, ‘cause you guys are perfect for each other. Y’know, we look at you and-and we see you together and it just…it-it fits. Y’know? And you just know it’s gonna last forever.

That’s what you should say.


I know! It's just that…ever since high school Rachel was the one person I told everything too. Y'know? I miss that so much now. She's my best friend.

Well, I was actually—I-I came over here to-to borrow this lamp. To umm, look at my books, y'know, see them a little better.

Great! Umm, well what-what I was doing in Chandler's room is that umm, I was cleaning it! In fact, he pays me to clean it!

Oh! What a great way to earn some extra pocket money.

Y'know when I said to you earlier that I was at work umm, I'm at my new work.

That's good enough. Right? (Pause.) Okay, well umm, I'm gonna go look at my books!


Monica, hey, can I borrow the Porsche?

But ehm...what is it not?

(abashed) A place to entertain my lady friends.


Oh, you're no ordinary roommate are you?

Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go running before it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!


to be the remains of a Paleozoic Amphibian in its jaws! How did it get there?!

Maybe this should be more of a quiet game.

Joey, I left my watch on the counter last night. (Goes to the counter) It was right here, where is it?

monica addressed joey, not ross (ground truth)


You were not supposed to hear that! I said that behind you back!

What if I have babies, okay? I mean I’m gonna look different. I’m okay with that, but I’m not sure that you are!

Look you have to realize I don’t think of you as a thin, beautiful woman. (Monica glares at him.) See this is one of things that I can apologize for later! Look, what I mean is you’re Monica! Okay? And I am in love with Monica.

Even if I shrink down to two inches tall?

I’d carry you around in my pocket.

I love you. (They hug and kiss.)

Skidmark’s still got a way with the ladies.


All right, but you can’t use that again for a whole year. I’m in.


God Joey, this is taking forever!

Whoa-whoa, what is it?

A date?! No, no Pheebs you-you must be mistaken, because I know you wouldn’t schedule a date on the same night you have plans with a friend!

Come on Joey, don’t make me feel badly about this.

No, I’m gonna!! That’s right! Yeah, you made me feel really guilty about goin’ out with that girl! Like-like-like I did something terrible to you! And now Pheebs, you’re doing the same thing!


Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!

Phoebe knows about us!

I'll have to get back to you on that. Okay, bye! (Hangs up.) Oh my God! He wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more!


No, come on Ross! (He grabs his bag so he can’t leave) Look, Ross, we have to get past this.

Give me the bag.

No, look, I don’t know what else to do. I said I’m sorry!

You should scream at me, or-or-or curse me, or hit me.

I’m not gonna hit you.

Why not?  You’ll feel better!  I’ll feel better, and you know you want to. I can see it in your eyes.

A little bit.


Ok, all right. It was an accident, I swear, all right. I was putting on myjacket, and the thing, and the lamp, and it broke.


I did it anyway.


Pheebs is your grandmother maybe saying that you should live here alone?

You heard her too?! You have the gift!

Phoebe, it’s okay. I like living with Joey.

Are you sure?

Oh please, I hate packing, it’s closer to work, and we do have fun. Although, I’m really gonna miss living with you.

Oh me too.

I know. (They hug.) Oh-oh, wait did you hear that-hear that? Listen, I’m gettin’ something from your grandmother, she said that since you get to keep the one bedroom apartment you should give Rachel the purple chair?

No, I do not hear that.


You told this guy that I was looking for a fling?! You don’t tell the guy that!

Oh, between you telling him that I wanted to have a fling and me putting out on the first date—oh, he’s so gonna get the wrong idea.

Hey, Joey, could you pass the cheese?

Yeah. Listen uh, I’d prefer it if you didn’t call me Joey. Since I don’t know anyone here, I thought it’d be cool to try out a cool work nickname.


(pause) Yeah, you could go to the game with me, ah, even though I know    you said you couldn't. But then you lied to me and tricked me and gave me a    bump on the head.


No! I’m not! I-I-I just think it’s wrong! It’s-it’s that I’m—Here I am about to pop and he’s out picking up some shop girl at Sluts ‘R’ Us!

Is that a real place? (Rachel’s stunned) Are they hiring?

(entering) Hey Phoebe! (To Rachel) Fatty!

Hey Chandler, why so fancy?

Well, I got a job interview. It’s kinda a big deal too. Its a lot more money and I’d be doing data reconfiguration and statistical factoring.


Touched. Used. Sat on. Sleep on.

I'll take it all.


Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, you’re, you’re, you’re making this too hard.

Oh I’m, I’m making this too hard. Okay, what do you want me to do.


Yes, every single one of them.


Anyway, one thing lead to another, and... oh... before   you know it, we were kissing. I mean, how angry do you think Joey is gonna   be?

Is he gone?


Yeah, just some 9-year-old Filipino kids who worked their fingers bloody for 12 cents an hour. (Phoebe stares at him wide-eyed. Chandler sees her reaction.) That didn't happen, I made that up!

Oh, Ross? Ross! You can't put up flyers in here.

How come? Everybody else does.


Open with a joke? It’s a university, not a comedy club!

talking about Chuckles University?!

Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring?


So it’s okay to date a student.

Well, not really. I mean technically it’s-it’s not against the rules or anything, but it is frowned upon. Especially by that professor we ran into last night, Judgey von Holierthanthou.

Well Ross, you be careful now. You don’t want to get a reputation as y’know Professor McNailshisstudents.

Yeah. What-what should I do?


C'mon Chandler, I think we have been given an opportunity. I mean, the mistake has already been made. They are writing up the paper right now.

But we are not the one she chose! How can you feel okay about this?

(very emotional) Because... We may not be who she thinks we are but no-one will ever love that baby more than us.


(taking a bite) Oh my God! That is so good!

I’m full, and yet I know if I stop eating this, I’ll regret it.


You gonna tell her?

Nope... (Monica walks in) Hey... so I'm gonna...   put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should   use these plates again for a looong time.

chandler addressed monica, not phoebe (ground truth)


Not that, this, US. Oh my God, Ross, you-re, you're, it's jus-, you-, ever sin- you been here.

Ow, ow, OK. Alright, alright, Mon, Mon, you've gone ultrasonic again, alright.

I just can't stand you being here all the time.

Why, why, why can't you stand me being here? I don't, I, we're just, ya know, we're just havin' fun.

Fun? Fun, you think this is fun?

Yeah, c'mon I mean I though, you know, I thought we're just foolin' around. Like when, uh, when we were kids.


(looks) Oh my God, you’re right! I am too late; they’re sitting on the couch and talking! (To Patrick) Come on! (They go over to the couch.) Rachel?

I’m just sort of in the middle of something.


Here you go.


(on phone) Hello? (Listens) Hold on please. Joey, it’s your mom. (Hands him the phone.)

(on phone) Mom, so what did you think? (He walks away allowing the gang a chance to figure out what they’re gonna say.)

And I have costumes.


That he doesn't exist.

So Chandler, have you heard about Monica's secret boyfriend?

rachel addressed chandler, not joey (ground truth)


Why would I eat my own arm?

Well you wouldn't, but we own the paper, we can print whatever we want.

You know what, Ross? I'm gonna throw in 50 bucks for you.

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


(Gasps) That cute waiter guy from your restaurant, the one that looks like a non-threatening Ray Liotta?

Y'know what, just give me a second and I'll be out of your hair. I'm just gonna grab a jacket. When I get back, I want every little detail. (There's a knock on the door.) Maybe that's him. (Goes to answer the door.)


(entering) Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!

(looking at the table) Excuse me ladies. (To Phoebe) I’m sorry?


Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.


marriage work. I have too. But the good thing is we can still see each other until she gets here.

good news, Ross! I think that's the best news I've heard since Le Poo died!

You have no idea what a nightmare this has been. This is so hard.

Oh yeah, really? Is it Ross? Yeah? Okay, well let me make this a just a little bit easier for you.


Ah, Catwoman. So we meet again.

So we do Supergirl.


Hey! You made it!

Okay is there…some kind of magic tunnel to this hospital?!


Yeah, I know.

Oh, I don’t know. Well maybe it’s just the idea of Barry for the rest of my life. I don’t know I think I feel like I need to have one last fling, y'know, just to sorta get it out of my system. (Chandler is listening in very intensely)

Excuse, I seem to have dropped my ball.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Whoa, whoa, prom night flashback.

I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mushfor thirty-something bucks? No! Rachel just had that, that, that salad, and, and Joey withhis like teeny pizza! It's just...

monica was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Well, I don’t know. I think it does something to salami.


Okay, okay, you got it!

Ross, can you pass me the yams?

Sure! Oh, and Joey’s got the mashed potatoes if you want to exchange them.


Yeah! What have you got to lose? Y’know you might even end up with someone really special (whispers) if you pick my guy.

Okay, so you will meet our guys?


Well, I am drinking lots of cups of coffee because I’m exhausted! Because Joey started snoring!

(proudly) Oh, you should here me.

It’s not something to be proud of, okay? You have to go to a sleep clinic!


. (Joey  enters.) I’ll call you back.

Who was that?

It’s just the pizza place.


Thunder being stolen!!

time thing. It doesn’t even matter!

Oh my God! I cannot believe you guys are talking about this! The problems in the bedroom are between the man and the woman!!! All right?!! Now Chandler is doing the best he can!!

joey addressed chandler, not monica (ground truth)


Well then I demand a recount! (Hmm, I wonder where I’ve heard that before.)

Actually, it wasn’t that close.

No! Y’know what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculous—We’re gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)

phoebe was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Staying out of the way.

This is impossible Monica, why don’t you just pick all 15? (Hands back the paper.)

There were only twelve.

Oh yeah, I added three.


Oh, Rachel, sweetie, look, here's a really cute picture of Joey and you at the reception.

Ohh, he's married! Ross is married. I can't—I still can't believe it. (Rachel grabs the picture from Monica)


You, you sure you need shoes? (Chloe nods her head) Okay. (reaches down and picks up a shoe)

chloe was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Actually, Billy Tratt is gay now. So-so that one’s not really our fault.

Monica, how come you never told me this?!

I thought it might be true. And I was afraid that you were gonna cry and then show it to me.


I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Let me see it again.

Joey was in a porno movie.

Ahh, alright, alright, alright, I was young and I just wanted a job, OK. But at the last minute I couldn't go through with it so they let me be the guy who comes in to fix the copier but can't 'cause there's people havin' sex on it.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin’ all dressed up and going to a fancy  restaurant. I’m not gonna be able to do that for so long, and it’s so much fun!  I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not  fun.

Why don’t I take you out?

What?! Joey, you don’t want to go on a date with a pregnant lady.

Yes I do! And we’re gonna go out, we’re gonna have a good time,  and take your mind off of childbirth and c-sections and-and giant baby heads stretching  out…


(while Rachel is finishing her rant) Okay! Okay! Okay! It’s okay. (Rachel stops.) It’s okay. Hey, it’s too weird for you, I won’t see her again.

No-no-no! No-no-no! Please Ross, I can’t! I can’t do it! (Starts to freak out.) It’s just gonna freak me out!!!

Okay! Okay! Ooh-hey-hey-hey! Okay! Okay! Okay! I’ll-I’ll tell her tonight I can’t see her anymore.


I’m sorry, I-I-I-I don’t live here anymore. I-I didn’t know how to tell you, but y'know everybody else knows!


Hey Mon, what are you doing now? Wanna come see a movie with us?

Uhh, y'know actually I was gonna do some laundry.


Hey, Joey, I don’t think that you should leave Chandler alone. I mean it’s only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishing next week?

Look, there’s nothing I can do for him right now, he’s still in his sweat pants, that’s still Phase One. Y'know? I’ll be back for Phase Two, I would never miss Phase Two.