Nodded off!! Ross you were snoring. My father’s boat didn’t make that much noise when it hit rocks!

Come on! Forty-five minutes! Forty-five minutes the man talked about strappy backed dresses.


Noo! I wish! Okay, you ready?

Okay! (She goes and gets her surprise and when she returns with it, Ross stares in shock.) Check it out!

What-what is it?!

It's a, it's a cat!


) How do you know a mugger?


Come on, it’s a hypnosis tape. This woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasn’t smoked since.

Nothing, it’s just that hypnosis is beyond crap.

Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City.

Hey, that guy did not hypnotise me! Okay.

Oh right, ‘cause you always pull your pants down at the count of three and play Wipe-out on your butt cheeks.


We got locked out of the apartment, we


(taking Ross aside) Have umm, have you thought anymore about you and Rachel?

Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all came in the room.


Hey you guys I'm gonna go out and take a walk.

Phoebe, why is your bag moving?

Oh, it's not!


OK, tip the man.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Well, I think, I think, Ross already has one. Now, this one’s free, right? Because you paid for the first two, so the third one’s free.

ross was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


No, you don't have to, and you can't because I, I live here too.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


And this from the cry-for-help department. Are you wearing makeup?

Yes, I am. As of today, I am officially Joey Tribbiani, actor slash model.


I see, I see, y-y-you're trying to freak me out.

Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right. Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freak…out. Oh my God, she's going to sit on you.

monica was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Hey, Rachel, Can-can I see you for a sec?

What? Yes, I am!

Ok, then, why are you... (she opens her robe revealing a nice black dress) all dressed up??

When you're sick, you do whatever you can to make yourself feel better! (she closes her robe)

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Hey Monica it’s Joey. Listen uh, Phoebe and I smell gas comin’ from your apartment.

monica was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


I told you! I am not coming to a naked wedding!

No, no, no, we’re not having a big reception, we took the money    we were gonna spend on a wedding and we donate them to the children charity.

That’s crazy! (Phoebe looks bewildered). I am sorry. I just can’t    imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!

phoebe was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Hey, so did everything go all right with the annulment?


Y’know it doesn’t matter how much I’m craving it. Y’know why I’m never gonna eat meat? Because it’s murder, cold blooded murder.

There’s a Phoebe on my sandwich! (He walks away, giving the sandwich to Phoebe.)

phoebe was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Well, are you just hanging out with Ross?

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems that…if you’re gonna have a roommate, y’know it might as well be the father.


Phoebe, are you, are you mad at me, or something? 'Cause if are please, tell me what it is I did!

Well, if you don't know I can't help you.


Ross, say something. Anything.

So you two are..?

And have you .. ed?

But if I hadn't walked in here, would you..?

Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this.  You have every right to go nuts.


Wow, what-what do you think she wants?


Well y’know I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by your building and I thought to myself, "What’s up with Carol and sweet, little Ben?"

carol was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!

And I just want a million dollars! (He extends his hand hopefully.)

Oh God Monica hi! I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!

monica was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Touched. Used. Sat on. Sleep on.


This is like figure skating team all over again. (Phoebe and Ross glare at him astonished) I mean synchronized swimming. (they continue to glare) I mean- I mean the balance beam. (to Ross) Help me!

I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.

I know, I hate being left out of things.


Oh my God. Richard? (turns around) Hi!

So, you look great.


See your twenty-five...and...uh, Monica, get my purse.


I-I am serious, I mean, we're, we're all over each other all the time.

Okay, you know where you are better than I do. I was just curious.

(Start annoying hyper-competitive mode now.) (Jumping up) What don't you just calm down Phoebe! All right?! Why don’t you just get all your facts before you run around telling everybody that you're the only hot couple!!


We should start with the big stuff. Y’know? That'll be the easiest. Uh, let's start with the couch. (He picks up one end and Ross doesn't help) I got it. (He moves it back to where he thinks it goes.)

Yeah that-that, doesn't look right.

What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with the carpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up on the...(Tries to rest his feet on the coffee table but they won't reach) OK, OK, here's what we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.

Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, but then the coffee table won't be centered in the seating area.

Yes, but the coffee table doesn't match the...blahebdmsdlkhdyslkd;btyds...Rooosss!!!!


Maybe Monica has a bobby pin.

monica was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


! Hey, so tell me about this Jane Eyre woman.

No! You should've read it yourself!


Phoebe, I can explain!

You told me you hate massages!


Hey, Joey, when you said the deal with Santa Clause, you meant?

That he doesn't exist.

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


I have plans.

All right, Chandler can make boxes, Ross can wrap, and Joey can lift things. Now Phoebe, go tell the guys they have to help out!

Hurry! Monica’s gonna make you pack! She’s got jobs for everyone! Now, it’s too late for me, but save your selves! (The guys scramble for the door.)


Y'know I don’t, I don’t understand guys, I mean I-I would never congratulate Monica on a great stew by y'know, grabbin’ her boob.


Chandler! (Knocks on the door.) Chandler! I just figured out who you are!

chandler was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, come on, what. You took his underwear?

He took my essence!

Okay, now hold on. Joey, why, why can't you just wear the underwear you're wearing now?

ross addressed joey, not chandler (ground truth)


What have I not told you?


Alright thanks, oh Ross could you stop by the coffee house and get me a muffin?

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Whats the matter with me? Why Im such a girl?

(returns) Okay, that was Mike.

Phoebe, hi, were so sorry. Youre totally right. We are here  one hundred per cent and we love you and we are ready to start your birthday  celebration.

rachel addressed phoebe, not chandler (ground truth)


I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul, was it?

Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. That can't be good.


Everything? Even the TV?

No! I’m putting that in my room.

Listen, Joey, I know what he did was wrong but don’t you think you could at least hear the guy out?

Back when you and Rachel were together, if Chandler had kissed her, would you hear him out?


Yeah! (to Sandy) Excuse me... (She walks to the kitchen    with Ross and sighs)


(Holding a shirt in front of Ross.) Okay, maybe this will make your teeth look less white. (Ross has a big smile.) Nope. Okay, colors that don’t work are blue, yellow, green, red, black, white, orange, and purple.

I don’t know what I’m going to do. That date starts in like an hour.

Hey Ross, maybe if your skin was lighter. Your teeth wouldn’t look so bright.

Oh great. So all I need to do is get some new skin. Thank you.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. We’re not 13 anymore.

Ross this is the only thing left that has a shot at working.

But, won’t she notice I have makeup on?

Please. Half the guys out there have makeup on.


Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant for you to find out!

Oh, please, you wanted to get caught. (Waves the receipt)

That is not true!

Oh, so you just sort of happened to leave it in here?


What am I gonna do?

No, no, don't, don't, rub it! Don't! (clapping) What gets out hummus?! What gets out hummus?!

Monica, Monica, you know what gets out hummus.

If it is a new message, what is he calling to say?


Well then I demand a recount! (Hmm, I wonder where I’ve heard that before.)

Actually, it wasn’t that close.

No! Y’know what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculous—We’re gonna flip a coin! (Phoebe gasps.) All right?! (She flips the coin.) Heads! (Looks at the coin and grunts in disgust.)

phoebe was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Oh no! Did you take my bra too?!

The pink one with the flowers?!

You mean the one that you’re wearing? (Adjusts Monica’s pink bra strap as Monica looks down her shirt.)

Sounds about right.

What is this?


Oh no! Did you take my bra too?!


be a baby!

Okay! (Runs that way and hears another whistle blast.) Hey! (Heads the other way and hears another blast.) What do I do?!! (She runs in the second direction and finds that the whistling is coming from inside a rack. She moves the dresses out of the way to find Rachel curled up in a fetal position frantically blowing on the whistle.) What are you doing? (Rachel doesn’t stop.) Did you find the dress? (Rachel won’t stop so Phoebe pinches her nose shut which causes her to spit the whistle out.)

No! You gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers are crazy!

No! You gotta hold my hand!!

Oh my God!! (She grabs Rachel’s hand and drags her towards Monica.) Excuse me! Excuse me! (She’s knocking women and veils out of the way as she moves.)


I mean think about all the money that you’re gonna make!

Well, her father pays you for baby-sitting right?


No, a car backfired, but (Rachel suddenly calms down) I thought somebody was taking a shot at me. And Rach, I…I survived! And I was filled with this-this great respect for life. Y'know? I-I want to experience every moment. I want to seize every opportunity. I-I am seeing everything so-so clearly now.

Well, I-I-I don't know how this fits into your whole "seizing" thing but um, Emily called you today.

You talked to her?

No, she left a message. (He starts for the machine.) (Stopping him.) But it-it kinda got erased. There's just (Pause) something wrong with your machine.


Yeah, I think it was better when you guys were sad. Hey, uh, remember the roller blades?

You know what else I’m not gonna miss? "I’m Monica. I wash the toilet 17 times a day. Even if people are on it!"


Yeah. What-what should I do?


And that would be?

I, um, can't tell you.

Joey, what's going on?

OK, you've got to promise that you'll never, ever tell Ross that I told you.

He's planning your birthday party.


(to Janice) Okay. (to Joey) Joey, trade lives with me!

Nope. (To Ross) Man look at this! Ross, I can’t believe you said you’d play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


I'm tellin' you, she leaned back, I could see her brain.


Umm, if ah, it might be okay if Ross came skiing?

(sarcastic) Oh please, can’t I come to your special, magical cabin?

Oh-oh, hitting me where it hurts, my ski skills.


She’s just doing her job!

(sitting at the kitchen table with his back to the TV) You sick bastards!


(entering from her bedroom) I gotta go to work. Has anybody seen my left boob?

I love that movie. (Joey is using it as a pillow)

There it is. Joey, what are you doing?

I'm sorry, it just felt nice.


Because I promised Mindy I would.

Yeah, well you promised Barry, you'd marry him. (Rachel glares at her, and she retreats to safety between Richard's legs)

Look you guys, I have to go, I'm the Maid-of-Honor. And besides you know what I just need to be in a room again with these people and feel good about myself.

Woo-hoo, stuud!

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


He called the Long Island Expressway a concrete miracle.


(to Rachel) Uh, how long until they announce the numbers, Mommy?

(looks around) I'll take this one too (to Ross) Uh ... Mommy?

Oh, I've gotten into the habit of calling Rachel "Mommy" when we're around Emma. Which I now realize we are not ...

ross addressed rachel, not chandler (ground truth)


Hi guys! Listen I really need your help. I think I did something  really stupid.

Well yes Rachel but you got something so beautiful out  there

No not that. I kissed Gavin last night.


(to Chandler) Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I never get to be yours at all?

Oh no-no-no, you—yeah, of course you get to be my best man.

(impatiently tapping Chandler on the shoulder) What about me?! You-you just said I could!

I’m not even getting married! Okay, this is a question for science fiction writers!

I can’t believe you’re not picking me.


Apparently, Sting’s son made fun of the fact that Ben’s moms are lesbinims.

them be friends.

Phoebe, you can’t force kids to be friends.

phoebe was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


(looking out the window) Hey Joey! Isn't that the girl that waved at you the other day?

joey was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, I thought it was just a kid yelling, "I’m gay! I’m gay!" Can I bring her in?

Oh no, let her stay out there. It’s sweet.


Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we are shooting tomorrow...

Joey, is this that thing that you do when you say you're bad so I'll give you a compliment?

A little. Yeah no, I really am worried, you know, I mean I have to make it convincing that I'm in love with Olivia.


No way! It’s mine!!

All that stuff you just said? I want that!

But Joey you don’t have $20,000!

Who cares?! I-I’ll make payments, whatever it takes, I want the Mr. Bowmont!!


Huh? Are, uh, any of these cultures, per chance, in the tri-state area?

You know, you are so amazing, is there anything you, you don't know?


Yeah, I think she wants the old one back.

But he's the same.


Nothing. It’s just old and dingy, that’s all.

I highly doubt that. (they both go to the bathroom)

Oh yeah. If you ah, move your hamper, you see what color the tile used to be. (Monica gasps) Yeah.

I can’t live like this! What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do?

Relax. Here hold this (hands her his beer). This old stuff just comes right off. (he bends down to try and lift some tile right in the middle of the floor, in his tight pants.)

That’s a little more than I wanted to see.

(manages to pry off only a small piece) Aw! Look at that, every inch of this stuff is glued down. It’d take forever to pry this up. You should ah, you should just leave it. (starts to walk away, but Monica grabs him)

I can’t leave it! You gouged a hole in my dingy floor.


Yeah, two hours, a lifetime that’s the same.


(entering) Hey, you guys.

(laughing) Oh, don’t you guys look cute. You guys make such a cute couple.

Monica, what are you doing?

(laughing harder) Nothing, I’m just trying to recreate some of the fun that we had at my place the other day. (To Phoebe) Remember, when you picked Rachel over me? That was funny.


Okay, but let's do it now though, because Chopper 5 just lost it's feed! (He grabs their bags and sprints out.)

Hey, so uh, y'know how there's something I wanted to talk to you about?

Well, y'know how I'm trying to work things out with Emily. Well, there's this one thing… Okay, (Rachel has her back turned to the camera, and Ross isn't looking at her.) here goes. I made a promise that-(they cut to the other camera and Ross notices something coming out of Rachel's nose)-Oh hey!

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


All right, but you can’t use that again for a whole year. I’m in.


Joey, Emma's right here! You promised not to bring girls home in the middle of the day anymore.

No, no, it's not a girl, it's...  a brand new Hugsy!


Joey you broke my chair!!

So, there was no miracle?!


Rach, come on, if you think about it, it’s actually kinda funny. (He laughs, and he laughs alone.) Okay, maybe it’s best not to think about it.

is inexcusable. I am shocked to my very core!

Phoebe, I told her you already knew.


All right, that’s it, you guys! What happened out there?

What? We took a walk, nothing happened. I can back with nothing all over me.


Well, we never actually got to dinner.

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


So then you know? (Phoebe nods her head)

phoebe was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Yeah! And also, a little like a French guy. (They both squint at each other.) I never noticed that before.


Great. It was great. She’s ah, she’s great, great looking, great personality, she’s greatness.

Sounds like she’s got the ah, whole package.

Joey told you about the leg, huh?

(to Chandler) Heard about the leg burnin’ huh?


What a bad idea!

Ohhhh, I cannot look at it! (She doesn't move.)


Well, he makes t-shirts for a living, and he thought it would be       appropriate to give me this.

Female body inspector? What size is that?


Okay. Okay, great! Umm, okay, just turn around.


everywhere she goes.

Ross, she’s 25 years old.

So what! I still have—No you’re probably right.

I know you’re planning my surprise bridal shower.


Yeah, he’s really excited about it too, he even recorded show times on his answering machine.


But I didn't get to shake my belly like a bowl full of jelly.

I'm sorry Chandler, but this, this is really important to me.

chandler was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


All right, well, we felt really bad about that so we decided we should all take a little trip together!

Ohh, that's so nice! How great! Well, where? Where's the trip?!


Well, the doctor says he's gonna be fine, he's just sleeping now.

(Tapping Ross on his shoulder) So, you feel like a dad yet?

ross was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


(stopping him) Hey, whoa-whoa! What's she like?

Uhh, well, she's…really good in bed.

Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!

(To Rachel) Well look, hey, it's all your fault!

Well because you didn't give me advice! No! You gave me a pickup line! As soon as I told her I wanted to y'know, build a foundation and be friends first. I suddenly, through no fault of my own, became irresistible to her! (Pause) And her roommate!


(to Chandler) Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I never get to be yours at all?

Oh no-no-no, you—yeah, of course you get to be my best man.

(impatiently tapping Chandler on the shoulder) What about me?! You-you just said I could!

chandler was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


It’s not in the apartment? (Monica gives a ‘Come on’ look) Oh no. I can’t believe this is happening again.

monica was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


(to the new Hugsy) You're not the same!


Nope, sound like me. Pheebs, it’s going great. Look at Chandler with little baby girl Chandler.

Little baby girl Chandler, where I have heard that before? Oh right, Coach Ruben. (Tries to get her to drink a little more from the bottle when he suddenly smells something. It’s times like these I’m glad Smell-O-Vision hasn’t been invented.) Do you know what Pheebs? When you’re done over there, we kinda have a situation over here too. (Phoebe is changing hers.)

See that’s where I think that you’re wrong. We’ve been playing these babies man for man; we should really be playing a zone defense.


(To Monica) So you came to the room looking for Joey? Did you ever in-intend on telling me about this?

Hey! (Monica turns and looks at him) Now I’m a man of the cloth, but I still have feelings!

(To Joey) Look there is no way you’re doing this wedding now. Okay?


Because! You’re mean on the boat!


You don’t need to fill these silences.

Chandler, that’s like your fourth cup of coffee!

monica addressed chandler, not gunther (ground truth)


I know, but don’t you think the sick thing is way better than the play thing?


Why Scott doesn't want to sleep with me. It's 'cause I'm not sexy enough.


(to Rachel) Uh, how long until they announce the numbers, Mommy?

(looks around) I'll take this one too (to Ross) Uh ... Mommy?

Oh, I've gotten into the habit of calling Rachel "Mommy" when we're around Emma. Which I now realize we are not ...

I'm hoping that if she hears it enough it will be her first word.

Although if we're gonna do that, we should probably call me "Daddy" too.


(on machine) "Hey Ross, it's you!" (Hits the stop button) Oh yeah, no that's-that's an old message, nobody needs to hear that.

(looking at the coffee table where his money was) Hey umm, was-was Monica here?

military leader. I mean I know I would make General way before any of you guys.


Okay, is this lamp in the same place?

Who cares? I repel women.

(blocks the door) No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no!!! You can't come in here! R-r-r-r-Ross is naked.

have to be naked?


Phoebe, come on that's silly.

All right, so let's switch.

No, I have all of the good words. OK, fine, fine, we can switch.

Please...wait, how did you do that?


Yeah, uh-huh, a 100 dollars.

Phoebe! I can't believe you gave them money! I thought you agreed it was totally unreasonable that they asked me for that money!

Yeah, but they didn't ask me! Y'know? This way I'm just y'know, the exotic, generous stranger. That's always fun to be.


Wow! How do you know how to do that?!


Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!


Oh, Chandler that is so nice.

Well, Kathy’s last boyfriend was Joey.


Ahh, the babies miss me?

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh yeah, and what would my opening line be? 'Excuse me. Blarrglarrghh.'


I mean think about all the money that you’re gonna make!

Well, her father pays you for baby-sitting right?

No, no, that’s funny. But maybe it’s time to move on, let it go, y’know? Stop it! Besides, Rachel is going out with Elizabeth’s father, so ah, he’s much older than she is. Looks like I’m not the only one interested in fossils, huh?


be a baby!


So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. (he tries to take a cookie but Monica slaps his hand)

These are for Erica!

Well, I want he baby to come out all cute and fat!

So, why is Erica coming to visit?

Well, because we want to get to know her better and she's never been to New York so she wants to see all the tourists' spots... you know, Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building...


I am pretty wisdomous.

So... what do you say?


Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuff right after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear?

All right, then you'd better show me some of that too then.

Okay, it's missing something. Ooh, I know! Umm, okay. (Goes and grabs a bag, that looks like a purse, and shows it to Joey.)


Well, let me just check that with what I got here, all right see 038 is not the number for (Ross starts making a lot of noise with a handheld pepper grinder) this store, 038 is Atlanta. And I...(stops and looks at Ross)

I’m sorry. But ah, hey, oh, somebody’s off the phone, how ‘bout a glass of wine by the fire, I could get it going again.


can be beat me? Let's go! Outside!!

Rach, Rach, I am so sorry. I am so-so sorry.


And I’m the happiest guy in the world! (Monica goes and sits down in a huff.) Oh honey, come on don’t be upset. We still have so much to look forward to!

That’s true! (Happily) I knew I married you for a reason!


In the hospital.

No I left the diapers at the hospital! There’s some in the bag but I’ll run out and get some more.

Alright thanks, oh Ross could you stop by the coffee house and get me a muffin?

Sure what kind?

Umm let me think...What do I want, what d-o I w-a-n-t...

Please take your time, it’s an important decision. Not like, say, I know! deciding to marry someone, this is about a muffin.

Blueberry it is.


I can't find the remote. [Phoebe turns off the TV] Thank you.

So, Scott asked me to come over for lunch today and I did.

And we did.


Joey, listen. I can't do this, it doesn't make any sense. Yesterday I was a nurse, and today I'm a waitress at a cafe?

Oh, sometimes we use the same extras for different parts. It's okay.

Well, it's not okay, because I gave a very memorable performance as the nurse. And now suddenly I'm the waitress? That's gonna confuse my fans.

Maybe you are a nurse, but you moonlight as a waitress.

Uhuh. Because I'm a single mother, supporting my two children.


Wow, a Swedish massage from a real Swedish person. (Puts her    head in the hole and Phoebe enters)

Okay, then I'm Swedish...

It's a normal Swedish name... Ikea...

Oh... what an interesting name.


Me too, we should get goin'.


(not smiling) That's not good.


Hey, y'know while we’re on that, when are you gonna tell my sister that you don’t live here anymore.


Hi, Ben. I'm your father. I am... the head. Aaaaaahhhh.... (puts picture down, sees Ross staring at her) Alright, this barbecue is gonna be very fun.

Hey, is Rachel here? Um, I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before I left.


Why is it sick?

Because it’s Richard’s son! It’s like inviting Greek tragedy over for dinner!

Hey, come on, Phoebe, you understand don’t you?

Yeah, I can see where I’d be your best shot but, no. I’m sorry, but I think it’s twisted.


Other wall, people! Other wall!

(knocks on door) Rach,  you there? (Joey and Rachel   both get up from the bed)

Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he   knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant. (Joey like   stands at attention with his chest forward and his hands on his sides, looking   up at the ceiling with his lips pouted.) That's not nonchalant!


Oh my God, Rachel! Hi!

rachel was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you! (Shows him Ben's picture.) Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!

Oh, be-because of the leather pants.

See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Now that's something.


(mumbling) Never hit a woman. Never hit a woman.

Ross bruises like a peach. He bruises like a peach.

Okay, Ill have the fixed salad and the duck.

Son of a bitch!


They live on the upper east side on Park Avenue!

Oh yeah, she can't be herself.

Okay, so... allright... Which dress? (she holds up    two 'Phoebe' dresses, Rachel and Monica look at them... taking their time, don't    wanting to hurt Phoebe) You can say "neither".

Yeah, totally! You are in such good hands. And I'm    so good with meeting parents. With the father, you know, you want to flirt a    little bit, but not in a gross way. Just kind of like "Oh mr. Pincer,    I can see where Wallis gets his good looks..."


Well uh, I-I’m a paleontologist. Umm, I-I live in New York. I have a son Ben. Uh, hi Ben! (Waves.) And uh…

I said a little bit Ross. Now, how about you Chandler?

Well Joey, I’m a headhunter. I hook up out of work Soviet scientists with rogue third-world nations. Hi Rasputin! (Waves.)


Ok, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's not funny anymore.


Yeah! All right—Look, I know sometimes it’ll be hard, okay? But, it’ll also be really…really great. Please Rachel! I-I-I really want you to stay.

I want me to stay too.


packing! So, as a gift to you, on our last night, ta-da!

(grabs a bag of those Styrofoam peanuts) I’ll be coordinator! Oh my God! I’m so sorry, I didn’t get you anything! Okay, look everybody has to help! Okay? You can help, can’t you Phoebe?

I have plans.

All right, Chandler can make boxes, Ross can wrap, and Joey can lift things. Now Phoebe, go tell the guys they have to help out!


Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.

Thank you. (Examines it) Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!

Oh good! 'Cause where else would we get any?

What is it?

Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for 'inspiration.' Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Barry and Mindy!

Barry who you almost...?

And Mindy, your maid of...?

(Takes it) That's Mindy? Wow, she is pretty. (Sees Rachel's look) Lucky. To have had a friend like you.


And this goes for all guys?


I think it's a great idea. Yeah, we could have a dinner party and just invite her close friends.


Thank you. Rachel, can I talk to you outside for a sec?

Well, then talk!

Okay, I will. Remember that thing that we just discussed that you wanted to do?


No, no, no, no, no, NO! No, no... we're not together.    We're not a couple. We're definately not a couple.

Well, you seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not    good enough for you?


Ahh, I-I did leave the gel on a little longer then it said to.

How much longer?

Ross you know that tonight is your date with Hillary?

I know. That’s why I did it. (With a big smile) Come on, are they really that bad?


No way!  I've been going to the guy for 12 years.

Oh come on!  He said he was going to do my inseam, and he ran his hand up my leg, and then, there was definite...

That's how they do pants!  Ross, will you tell him? Isn't that how they measure pants?

joey addressed ross, not chandler (ground truth)


Here's your scone.

Oh, thanks Gunther. (He takes it, hands the plate it's on to Rachel, sets it down on the table, and proceeds to pound it into oblivion while saying.) STUPID BRITISH SNACK FOOD!!!!!!!

ross addressed rachel, not gunther (ground truth)


I don’t have any issues with my Father.

Okay, so it’s probably just the Ross thing then.

phoebe addressed ross, not rachel (ground truth)


Well, thank you for lunch.


!! I mean, look, I left a note and everything.

(reading) Knock-knock. Who's there? Ross Geller's lunch. Ross Geller's lunch, who? Ross Geller's lunch, please don't take me. Okay?


No, I mean tonight, in the building. Suddenly. Into our lives.

Well, the cat... the cat turned out to be Paolo's cat!


Rach you did not leave the water running. Please, just pull  yourself together, okay?

Ah, did I leave the stove on?

You never cooked since 1996. (Actually Rachel cooked in 609 -  TOW Ross Got High, first aired 1999-11-25.)

Is the window open? Because if theres a window open, a bird  could fly in there.


See Chandler? I’m getting a lot of use out of them already! They’re very practical. See, you can wear them with dresses, with skirts, with pants…

chandler was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


. (Joey  enters.) I’ll call you back.

Who was that?

It’s just the pizza place.

You hung up on the pizza place? I don’t hang up on your friends.

I’m sorry honey, I’m just having a, having a rough day.


Now Joey, you go down there and you suck up to him. I mean you suck like you’ve never sucked before!

All right! I’ll try! But if I can’t, you can stay with Chandler and I until you get settled.


Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself any day now. (Chandler returns with a bobby pin and hands it to Joey.) Wow, you sure found that quick. (He tries the pin in the lock.) I just—I wish I didn’t feel this way about Rachel anymore, y’know? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I love living with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I think…I think Ross feels left out. Y’know? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, the doctor thought I was the father. God… You should’ve seen the look on Ross’s face. (Pause) By the way, I have no idea what I’m doing here. For all I know I’m just locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?

That’s a good idea.


No, Joey! You borrowed my cab; you have to drive it back.

I don’t want to drive all the way back by myself, I get so lonely. (Gets an idea.) Oh—ooh! How about you come with me?

I don’t know, it’s such a long trip.

It’ll be great! We-we could talk, and play games! Huh? This could be our chance to like renew our friendship.

Are you asking me to have a frenaissance?


Well, oh, I’m sorry your car broke down Pheebs, but I’m a little too busy with some of my real friends right now, but please call to let me know you got home safely okay?


Oh yeah, and what would my opening line be? 'Excuse me. Blarrglarrghh.'

Oh, c'mon. She's a person, you can do it!

more out of my league? Ross, back me up here.


Oh, yeah. And uh, the best part though, when the uh, waiter spilled water down my back, I jumped up, and my boob popped out.


Hey! Oh Joey, honey listen, thank you for talking to my yesterday about that thing with my boss. That really meant a lot.

Not a problem. Oh, and just so you know, that guy’s not going to be bothering you about that baby thing anymore.

Let’s just say I took care of it.

Don’t worry! Don’t worry. I just told him, very nicely, "You don’t go buying people’s babies, so back off!!"

No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesn’t want to buy my baby! I made that up!


Well, if he's gonna break up with you, maybe Joey and I should water his plants. If y'know what I mean.

Or ha-ha, we could go over there and pee on them.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


No, you don’t have to, and you can’t because I live here too.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Yes, it was horrible. She cried. I cried. She threw things, they hit me. Anyway,I did the right thing.

[in phone] So, Spock actually hugs his father?

Hey, do you guys have...[sees Ross, pauses]...hi.

I uh, I just got back from uh, from Julie's.

No, no, uh, it's not what you think. It's um the other thing.


Yeah, Monica's settin' me up.


Oh really? Did she tell you he plays the recorder, recites    poetry and bakes Madeleines?

Oh... How are they?

(looks like in heaven) Lighter than air... (changes    back to serious) But that's not the point. (Joey now also enters)

(looks surprised) Really...? Guys do that...? That's...    weird...

That's like a woman wanting to be a...


No one got me an engagement present.

Okay, here I wish you health and happiness. (She hands Monica a cookie in a plastic baggie.)

phoebe addressed monica, not ross (ground truth)


It’s not a club.


Well, then, I might as well offer to stay.

(to Chandler and Monica) Hey, does anybody else feel bad about Ross?

(to Joey) Well he’s probably mad after you called him this morning to borrow his goggles.


And the big one’s for me!

Wait, we can’t do this.

I don’t wanna know what Monica got me. Y’know? I mean, look, I’m sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.

Hey guys! You found the presents? Chandler, you let them find the presents? Great! Do you know how long it took me to find you that water purifier?


Well, he makes t-shirts for a living, and he thought it would be       appropriate to give me this.

Female body inspector? What size is that?


Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.

phoebe was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


...Ninety-five, ninety-six, ninety-seven. See,

You got waaaay too much free time.

(to Ross) Hey! Here's the birthday boy! Ross,


You're on in 5 Ms. Minnelli.

(on the phone) No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. (Listens) No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. (Hangs up.)

What's the matter Ross?

Nothing. Oh, actually, great news! I just got off the phone with Emily and it looks like I'm moving to a new apartment. Woo-hoo!

Well, her thought is, and I agree, fresh new furniture, why not a fresh new apartment? Her cousin has this great place to sublet, it's got a view of the river on one side and Columbia on the other.


I’d love that. I would loooove… (Carol goes to make the coffee and she sits down.) So uh, so where is sweet little Ben? I would love to have a little...

carol was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Well, you could also give back the money you owe me.

Okay. Have a benefit.

Hey! Ross, listen can you come to a charity event tonight?

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuff right after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear?

All right, then you'd better show me some of that too then.

Okay, it's missing something. Ooh, I know! Umm, okay. (Goes and grabs a bag, that looks like a purse, and shows it to Joey.)

Really? A purse?

It's not a purse! It's a shoulder bag.


No, you're right. Well, we'll find something. Let's just get you out of that. Come on.

No, no, no, no, no, no, not out of that, not out of clothes.

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


[her and Richard return to her place] So are you ok?

Yeah, just, I feel like I'm about a hundred. I thought I was just one of the guys.

Come here. I'll make you feel like one of the guys. You know for a really cool guy, you suck at foosball.


Well, I can't give you a massage, because my licence has been revoked again!

Phoebe, what happened?

Well, it was an accident...You know, it's a lot of oil and sometimes the hand just slips!


No! No! No Ross! I’m not hot! Are you hot?

It’s been six months! I’m always hot!

Well you’re not selling the story! It’s like; it’s like you don’t believe it! Look, I gotta go. I got a date, but try this. Do what I do when I’m preparing for an audition. Okay? I’ll set you up with my video camera and you can record yourself and-and see what you’re doing wrong.

All right now… All right, you’re all set up. You’re good to go. Just hit record. All right?

Listen, if you ever have any problem with the ladies you know I’ll help you out.


And I’m sure you’re gonna make a big impression. Hi! I’m Rachel Green. It’s nice to meet you. (He lifts his leg and imitates shaking hands with it, just like how Rachel was trying to pick up the aspirin with her feet.) Come on, you probably have a broken rib!

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Ninety percent of a women’s pheromones come out the top of her head! That’s why, that’s why women are shorter. So that men will fall in love when they hug them! (Ross is staring at her dumbfounded.) Oh come on Ross, you’re a scientist.

I was hugging her as a friend. It’s not my fault her-her hair got in my face, she’s got a lot of it and it smells all-all uh…coconutty. (Phoebe raises her eyebrows.) What?! Oh, that doesn’t mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybe it means I have feelings for coconuts!

(taking his coffee) Okay, whatever you say. But just be careful, all right? Rachel’s not in the same place you are.

am not in that place!

Okay, I didn’t understand that, but y’know, maybe that’s ‘cause you were speaking the secret language of love!


No! The guy is mean. I mean really mean. I think you should stay away from him.

, maybe, I should stay away from all men.

No, it’s not just ‘cause I’m jealous. (Both Monica and Chandler give him a ‘Come on’ look) I mean I’m not, I’m not, I’m not jealous, okay? It’s… Look, the guy, he screamed, he actually screamed at this couple sitting in our seats.

ross addressed chandler, not rachel (ground truth)


Yeah, I think that fifth shower actually got the interview off me.

Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent.

Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.

No no no, if I couldn't pay you back right away then I'd feel guilty and tense every time I saw you.

Oh OK. Well then why don't you, uhh, why don't you borrow it from mom and dad? You feel guilty and tense around them already. You might as well make some money off of them.


So you’re never actually going to pay me back?

Wait a minute, just because he paid for your head shots you’re gonna take him? Joey, I don’t think you’re comprehending just how slutty this dress is!

monica addressed joey, not chandler (ground truth)


Really?! Oh that’s so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon, if you touch my guitar again I’ll have to pound on you for a little bit.

I’ll get everybody else (Does so), finally we can start celebrating my—(She gasps and is stopped by the sight of Ross and Rachel making out in the hall.) I’m sorry, uh apparently I’ve opened the door to the past.

Okay, Monica. Mon, uh what-what you just saw…

(interrupting) Can I ask you just a little question, huh? Why tonight?

See, I’ve been waiting my whole life to be engaged, and unlike some people I’m only planning on doing this once. So, uh y’know, maybe this is selfish and I’m sorry about it, but I was kinda hoping tonight could just be about that.


Rach, you can’t look fat in an x-ray.

Okay! Now you stay out here, and you think about what you did!!

That’s a bad duck!!! (to Ross) How’d the thing go tonight, Ross?

Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on. (they go into her apartment) Easy.

(to the duck) Okay, now when you come back I hope you remember that, that chick is not a toy! (He goes back into the apartment)


What are these, like famous chickens?

Hey, sorry I'm late. Congratulations, Mon. (to Ross) I'm not sorry I'm late.How incredible was my afternoon with Jade?

Well, pretty incredible according to the message she left you on my machine. Hey,Chandler, why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine?

Oh, see, I had to tell her that my number was your number, because I couldn'ttell her that my number was my number because she thinks that my number is Bob's number.


. The band Heart is having a really tough time, and I think they may break up.

Nah, Monica’s watching some cooking show. Come on, I don’t want to miss when they were skinny.

Chandler, Chandler, y’know what we should do? You and I should go out and get some new sunglasses.

What? No, I want to watch this. (He turns on the television and the screen is completely covered in snow). Did your cable go out?


If you said, "Big lima bean, bubbling up." Would she understand the difference?

(noticing Rachel crawling behind the couch) Rach? What are you doing?

Oh boy, I just can't watch. It's too scary!

It's a diaper commercial.


(sarcasticly) Thanks Joey, that's a good idea.

What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for?


Ahh, I-I did leave the gel on a little longer then it said to.

How much longer?

Ross you know that tonight is your date with Hillary?

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Chandler! (Knocks on the door.) Chandler! I just figured out who you are!

Can you figure out what I’m doing?

Lewis Posin! He was my best friend in fifth grade, and-and then one day I asked him to be my boyfriend and he said no. Do you know why?


Look, can't we just say that you believe in something, and I don't.

No, no, Pheebs, we can't, ok, because--


Ooh, chocolates on the pillows! I love that!

Come here. (He does, and they kiss.) Okay, be right back.

Oh yes! Monica, get in here! There's a high-speed car chase on!

We're switching rooms.

(looks at what she's holding and shies away) Oh dear God, they gave us glasses!


Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found this great place called "Invisible things for Kathy." (Motions to an imaginary pile of presents next to him.) Can you give me a hand with all this stuff?


Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.


He's a brilliant diagnostician!


Joey! This is like the last commercial. You've got like (checks his watch) ten minutes left!

I know, I know! What am I going to do? (Thinks) Ooh!

(dejected) Yeah, all right. (Thinks of something.) Ooh! (He quickly runs out before anyone can stop him.)


Yeah, sure, right! Like I've ever been in Rachel Green's room.


Oh, Joey, it's so great to be back here. I gotta tell you, you're       making it so easy on me and Emma.

Hey, it's great having you back. You know, stay as long as you want,       and when does she stop crying all night?


What dog? There-there's no dog here.

Yeah that dog left!

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


(mumbling) Never hit a woman. Never hit a woman.


Oh my God Chandler! I can’t believe it!

Why do they put so much steam in there?!


He took my essence!


You're right, I'm sorry. Will you marry me?


Phoebe we just saw mine, let me see yours.

Oh OK. [pulls over her shirt and shows a bare shoulder] Oh no, oh it's gone, that's so weird, I don't know how-where it went.

You didn't get it?


Okay great, hold on a sec! (She runs to her room and returns carrying a huge bag of laundry.) Oh, here you go! You don't mind do ya? That would really help me out a lot! Thanks!

I mean I-I don't I think I have enough quarters.

Hey Ross! Any word on the apartment yet?


You’re so pathetic! Why can’t you just accept it, we’re winning because I’m better than you.


(entering) Okay, I'm in my sweat pants. Bring on the food! (Sees that Chandler has a worried look on his face) What's the matter?

chandler was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Oh. Why not?

‘Cause I know he’s gonna flip out and I hate it when he’s angry.

What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again he’d make me eat the entire pack.

Wow! Oh well, I will be there!

Gosh. I’m not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.


Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer]

Don't touch the computer. Don't ever touch the computer.


Okay. Okay. Okay. Umm, maybe you can start with, "Chandler, even though we were friends; there was a part of me that always knew I wanted more."

All right, there’s a nuclear holocaust, I’m the last man on Earth. Would you go out with me?


(not smiling) That's not good.

(smiling) No, smile! Not that face, smile! Everybody smile! (They all smile.)


Okay. I'd- just- I'd never be able to enjoy it. It would be like this giant karmic debt.

Chandler, what are you doing?

And this- is my reward!


Oh, hey, you guys are finally gonna get to meet Kate!


(To Rachel) Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!

Now I know that they said that the umm, the hair straightener started the fire but I think I’m partly at fault. You see, I didn’t, I didn’t tell you but umm, but I-I had recently refilled the tissues and so y’know let’s just face it, that’s just kindling! So I think it’s better that I stay at Joey’s.


Didn't it like totally speak to you?

Woah, woah, woah, what book is this?

Rachel you have to read this book. It's called <i>Be Your Own Windkeeper</i>. It's about how women need to become more empowered.

monica addressed rachel, not phoebe (ground truth)


Phoebe, do you think that your favorite animal says much about you?

phoebe was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Actually, in Oklahoma smoking is legal in all commune areas  and offices with fewer than fifteen people.

No! I just happened tdo a lot trivias about smoking in  different states. For example, in Hawaii cigarettes are called  Leyhallalookoos.

(smells at him) Chandler, you stink of cigarettes.

Uch, do you think, Monica is gonna be able smell it?

Are you kidding? The woman has the nose of a bloodhound  and  the breasts of a Greek goddess.


Yeah, maybe if you’re in love. But Ross, we are not in love, are we?

No but…but still you can’t possibly do this alone.

Come on Rach, you can’t even eat alone in a restaurant.

I’m just saying if you can’t eat by yourself, how do you expect to have a baby by yourself?


Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here?

Uhh, yes I did but there isn't. Okay, here we go.


Well, now she has no eyebrows, mission accomplished.

But Monica, he loves his job so much! Can you just give him another chance? Please?

(thinks about it) All right, but if-if he lights someone else on fire he is out of there!

That’s fair! Thank you so much. Thanks. Oops, it looks like when he got the pastry chef he got you a little bit too.

I paid to have this done.


And you're thinking of taking it? (Pause) So before   you said being me with me was more important than any job, but I guess now   it's old job, (Raises his hand) me, (Raises his hand) new job.

I'm gonna miss this hand! Okay I know it's a lot   to ask, but oh my God Chandler, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity.

What happened to 'you can't live without me four   days a week'?

Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days   is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see   you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really   if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make   it one day, we've got real problems my friend.

I think you should take the job.

Yeah. I know it must be important to you when you   start chattering like a monkey.

That's the nicest anyone has ever said to me!


What do you think you’re doing?!

Just washing the windshield. (She turns on the wipers forcing Ross off of the hood.)

way I am letting you drive this car! So why don’t you just hand over the keys?


Chandler is supposed to find out if he's getting an assistent job at his ad agency. But out of the 15 interns, they are only hiring three.


Perhaps because you gave her an engagement ring? Y’know Ross doctors are supposed to be smart.

I didn’t give her that ring!

So whose ring is it?


All right. Did everyone get out okay?

Well, the giraffe’s okay. And so is the pirate.

No Phoebe, don’t look! You don’t want to see what’s under there!!

ross addressed phoebe, not monica (ground truth)


(to the new Hugsy) You're not the same!


Well then I demand a recount! (Hmm, I wonder where I’ve heard that before.)


That's it! Thanks Pheebs!


What are you doing? We're going to a hospital.

What, so I can't lokk nice? There might be doctors there.

Joey, get out of the fridge.

For the ride.


So, what do you thing the good news is?

(looking at the checkbook) Wow! Look at this! He wrote a check for 50,000 dollars to Hugo Ligrens Ring Design. (Monica is stunned) Oh, sorry, what do you think the good news is?

monica was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Hey! Hey, you guys, I finished the crossword all by myself! Hug me!

Oh, it was great! The widow wouldn't pay, so Phoebe yelled at her 'til she did.

monica addressed phoebe, not rachel (ground truth)


Phoebe, you get the bear, uhm, Joey, you get the robot, and Chandler    and I get the dog. Ok, and the race is going to go (Takes two cups and marks    the start and finish lines with them) from here to here. Now the one who comes    in last, stays!

Ok, on your mark... Get set... GO!!!

(to the dog) What are you barking at?

Wha... How the hell is that gonna help?


Oh Monica, listen, I ah, I saw down at the hardware store, they got those designer tiles on sale. If you ever want to redo the bathroom floor.

Why, what’s wrong with my bathroom floor?

Nothing. It’s just old and dingy, that’s all.


You're right, I'm sorry. Will you marry me?

Aw, and I was gonna ask you to marry me because I forgot to say hello to you last week.

Oh no wait Pheebs, I think for something like that you just ask them to move in with you. But I'm not sure, Chandler?

rachel addressed chandler, not phoebe (ground truth)


Well, we never actually got to dinner.

No, we kinda broke up instead.

(looking up at the ceiling) God, Monica it’s on the ceiling.

monica was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


I like them a lot.

That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight. (Motions to Ross's buttock.) Maybe there's something in that area.

Oh see, I-I needed a new thing for today and there's this leather store that always smells so good and I thought to myself, "Wow, (To Chandler) I never really owned a good smelling pair of pants before."


came on the sound system, and the lights came down. And I got down on one knee and written across the dome in the stars were the words "Will you marry me?"


I don't get it. What do you see in this guy, anyway?


No. No, I gotta go home sometime.

You be okay?


It’s all gonna be okay. They’re just so happy that I’m not suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. So long as I understand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any other child I should bear.

is really going out of there way to show they’re not in the baby buying business.

Chandler, can you give us a minute?

chandler was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


(he takes a baby blue beret out of a shopping box and puts it on) How does this look?


Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Monica, get the wine and unplug thephone. Rachel, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?

phoebe addressed rachel, not monica (ground truth)


Okay, but let's do it now though, because Chopper 5 just lost it's feed! (He grabs their bags and sprints out.)

Hey, so uh, y'know how there's something I wanted to talk to you about?

Well, y'know how I'm trying to work things out with Emily. Well, there's this one thing… Okay, (Rachel has her back turned to the camera, and Ross isn't looking at her.) here goes. I made a promise that-(they cut to the other camera and Ross notices something coming out of Rachel's nose)-Oh hey!

ross addressed rachel, not chandler (ground truth)


Phoebe why don’t you just call her? You obviously want to.

You think you know me so well.


(coming back from the bathroom) What's up? (she sees the gift    certificate in Rachel's hands) Hey, Rachel!!

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.

I'll have to get back to you on that. Okay, bye! (Hangs up.) Oh my God! He wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more!


Ross has some big thing to tell everyone.

ross was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Hmm. Look, Ross, if you want your neighbors to like you, why don't you just pay the hundred bucks? The party's gonna cost you way more than that.

It doesn't matter! It's my principles! We're talking about my principles!

Okay, I thought it was about your neighbors liking you.

Oh, they'll like me. Once they come to my awesome PAR-TAY! Okay, I gotta run. I gotta go get some nametags. (Exits.)


I would say, "Woman, please!"

sweet! He’s a teacher, he does all this volunteer work. Y’know normally y’know, I don’t like really sweaty guys. But this one? I could just mop him up!


You know, we should just go, I’m not gonna find anything here! This stuff is ridiculous!

Ah, this place is great!

Rach, come on, I’m not gonna wear any of this! (he picks up a shirt) Nothing silver. (Rachel sighs). Ok? Nothing with hair! (Rachel sighs again) And nothing with padlocks on it! (Rachel heaves a long disappointing sigh).

Ross, look, I know that some of this stuff is out there, but I mean, come on, look at this, look at this sweater! (she picks up a blue sweater). I mean, this is just beautiful!

(feeling the fabric) Wow, this is really soft (he looks the price). Three hundred and fifty dollars?

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Monica, you remember me telling you that joke, right?

Well, you tell a lot of jokes!

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


C'mon, sit. Just sit down, sit.

You should feel great about yourself! You're

Monica, what is so amazing? I gave up, like,

rachel addressed monica, not joey (ground truth)


Seriously, where did you get the hat?

Ross gave it to me.

Yeah, I think she looks good.

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Huh? Are, uh, any of these cultures, per chance, in the tri-state area?


Ross, please, this is a hospital, ok? That actually means something here.

Rach, I think I'm gonna wait out here, because my throat is feeling a little scratchy, I don't want to infect him.


Chandler, you have to tell Joey that you're not in Tulsa.

chandler was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Ross, you remember Susan.

ross was addressed by carol and spoke (ground truth)


Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer]


…so then President Steve told everyone that I was a cheapskate, and now the whole building hates me! A little kid spit on my knee! Y'know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna throw a party. That's right. For everyone in the building, and I'm gonna sit them down and explain to them, I am not a bad guy. I am not a cheap guy! I'm just a guy who-who stands up for what he believes in. A man with principles.


(coming back from the bathroom) What's up? (she sees the gift    certificate in Rachel's hands) Hey, Rachel!!


Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please. (Behind the menu) What are you doing?

Well, I was having a conversation.

Yeah but, Mischa is so interested in you, that Sergei and I haven’t been able to say two words to each other.

What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have a conversation?

That would be great. Thank you.


No, okay, you’re right. You’re easy-going. You’re just not as easy-going as Rachel. She’s just more flexible and-and mellow. That’s all.

(To Monica) Well, people are different.

Ya, you know, Rachel … she’ll do whatever you want. Y’know, you can just walk all over her.

What? Wait a minute. What are you saying, that I’m a pushover? I’m not a pushover.

Oh, okay, (laughing) you’re not a pushover.


No well, no it's not that bad, y'know? I mean yeah, my tongue feels a little fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up.

Okay, but you gotta push past this because it is about to get so good!


Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in case Rachel’s dessert is...[about to say “bad”] so good that I eat all of it. There’s none left for anybody else!

No, sweetie, I-I trust you.

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Great! Okay, if you’ll just excuse me. (To the guy) So, did you hear something you liked?

Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!

Hey uh, I brought you some lunch.

Ohh! That’s so sweet of you! Oh yum! (Takes a bite out of the sandwich and starts to get sick.) Did you put pickles on this?


She said that?!


! Dead guy getting hit in the groin twenty, thirty times! No?

Chandler, I gotta tell you, I love your mom's books! I love her books! I cannot get on a plane without one! I mean, this is so cool!

Yeah, well, you wouldn't think it was cool if you're eleven years old and all your friends are passing around page 79 of 'Mistress Bitch.'


No, just give me another minute.

Look Ross, if you don't know them by now, you will never know them, okay? That is the beauty of this game. It makes you want to kill yourself.

This-this is crazy! I can do this! All right, uhh, I bet I can get all 50 before dinner.

Okay, but if you can't…no dinner!


What?! Look, we’re trying to rebuild a relationship here, right. How am I supposed to do that here, without being totally honest with each other?


(overhearing that) Why don't you just go out with her!

(following him) And did you notice the ice? (Gestures to 3 huge buckets of ice on the table.) Look! We have it all! We have crushed! Cubed! And dry! Watch! (Pours some water onto the dry ice, causing it to evaporate/smoke.) Ahhh! Mystical!


(running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!

Well, Chandler and I are in a bar…

Did you not hear me say, "Du-ude?!"


Ross, you should know that my pants are startin’ to come down and I’m not wearing any underwear!


Where are you going?


Anytime anything comes close to touching her eye or anyone else's she like freaks out. Watch! Watch! (He takes his finger and moves it towards his eye.)

(flinches) Ross! Come on! That's all right! Fine--Okay, I have a weird thing about my eye. Can we not talk about it please?

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Oh great. So all I need to do is get some new skin. Thank you.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. We’re not 13 anymore.

Ross this is the only thing left that has a shot at working.

But, won’t she notice I have makeup on?

Please. Half the guys out there have makeup on.


Look, it's a nice gesture, it is. But it just feels like--

We're just tryin' to do a nice thing here.

Ross, you have to understand that your nice thing makes us feel this big.

I don't, I don't understand. I mean, you, it's like we can't win with you guys.


Oh no, no, I’ll be there too.

Okay so, we’ll just come up with some kind of signal if it’s going well you can take off.

No Phoebe! I just need you there for support. I haven’t told him I’m pregnant yet.

Oh. Why not?

‘Cause I know he’s gonna flip out and I hate it when he’s angry.

What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again he’d make me eat the entire pack.


Why is it sick?

Because it’s Richard’s son! It’s like inviting Greek tragedy over for dinner!


We think he was trying to spell out 'MONKEY.'

Well, the doctor says he's gonna be fine, he's just sleeping now.


Who's Gladys? (Phoebe shows her a horrific painting    with a half-a-body girl dummy coming out of the frame. Monica's frightened and    she gasps.) Oh! What a tragic loss!

phoebe was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


(running up to Ross) What happened in Atlantic City?!

Well, Chandler and I are in a bar…

chandler was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no, that's OK, I don't need them. I'm going for fours.

Alright, here we go. We've got salmon roulettes and assorted crudites.


Ok Ross, just so you know, calling it a poopie diaper doesn't make this process any cuter.

Come on up. I'm gonna get the rest of his stuff together. [walks in his room]

Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can. [finishes the diaper] There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.


Okay. All right, that's true! But y'know I just don't embarrass that easily.


Ross! That is so sweet of you to get Phoebe that bike! When I heard the story, I almost cried.

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Let’s have Monica decide.

monica was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Oh. Well then way to go you big movie star!

I know! All right, I’ll see you guys over there! I’m off to fight the Nazis.

Oh, wait Joey! We fought the Nazis in World War II, not World War I.

Whoa! Okay. Yeah well, who-who was in World War I? (Rachel pauses as she thinks.)

You’re gonna be late! Go! Go! (He runs out.)


Yeah, what-what's going on?

Monica had lunch with Richard.

phoebe addressed monica, not joey (ground truth)


Well what is wrong with me? Am I .. am I incomptent?   Because I managed to survive whatever it is that killed the three of you!


Phoebe, are you, are you mad at me, or something? 'Cause if are please, tell me what it is I did!

Well, if you don't know I can't help you.

Well, whatever it is I'm-I'm very, very sorry. Okay?

Okay. So we're, we're good?

All right. (Gets up.) I'll uh, I'll see you later, okay?

(quietly) Bye, fat ass.

ALL RIGHT!! Phoebe now come on! Will you please tell me what it is I did that mad you so mad at me!


I don't want to.

Joey, honey, they don't know what they're talking about.

Maybe they do. I've been doin' this ten years and I haven't gotten anywhere.There's gotta be a reason.

No, no, no, it.. it's too hard. It's not worth it. I quit.


No... no! And yet it did. Good-bye, Janice.

Oh, Chandler, sorry.

Ok, well, this was very special.


Listen, I’m sure that dad doesn’t care. He probably thought this was funny; he’ll be telling this story for years!

I don’t want him to tell this story for years.

Oh, but he will. He still tells the story how Monica tried to escape from fat camp.

ross addressed monica, not chandler (ground truth)


And thank you, for that.

But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was never very good at the flirting thing.

What? (Mumbles) What-what, what are talking about? It-it worked with you.

nine years later you had me!

All right, all right. You-you-you know what I'm going to do? I am going to order another pizza and when Caitlin gets here, you-you--I will show how well I flirt. Yeah! I will, I will get her phone number! (To Chandler) And not the one on the menu!


If you want, I'll do it.


Hey! Hey, you guys, I finished the crossword all by myself! Hug me!


See there you go. Woo! We're out of the woods. Okay, I'll get dressed now.


I don't get it. What do you see in this guy, anyway?

Well... he happens to be a very nice... guy....

Rachel, come on. Give us a chance.

Ross, it's too hard.

No, no, no... why, because it might get weird for everyone else? Who cares about them. This is about us. Look, I-I've been in love with you since, like, the ninth grade.


Check it out. (He turns around, pulls down his pants, and shows Phoebe that he’s got panties on.) How much of a man am I?!

Wow! Nice! Manly and also kind of a slut.

Y’know, I’m beginning to see what Jake was talking about.

The silk? Feels really good!

Yeah! And-and things aren’t as…smashed down as I thought they were gonna be.

Yeah! And you have so many more choices than you do with men’s underwear!


Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it.

But Mon, you have to get our money!

Oh, Phoebe, she couldn't stop crying! With those thick glasses, her tears looked giant.

I know, it's tough. You know what the first thing I did after my mother's funeral was?


Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!

feel your ears?

Chandler, where are your tools?

monica addressed chandler, not joey (ground truth)


I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or   something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the   door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa   is real."

(to Monica) We have to get out of here, baby!

Everyone? I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.

Oh my god, are we supposed to answer?

O is for "oh, wow!" The V is for this very surprising turn   of   events, which I'm still fine with by the way. E is for how extremely   normal I find it. That you two are together. And now one day you might   get married and have children of your own.


(interrupting) Can I ask you just a little question, huh? Why tonight?

See, I’ve been waiting my whole life to be engaged, and unlike some people I’m only planning on doing this once. So, uh y’know, maybe this is selfish and I’m sorry about it, but I was kinda hoping tonight could just be about that.


Good! Me neither! So it’s not a problem. We’re just two friends who happen to be roommates.

Okay, but Ross, eventually you and I are gonna be dating.

Really?! We are?

Yeah! I’m gonna have a boyfriend, you’re gonna have a girlfriend…


Oh, Rachel, sweetie, look, here's a really cute picture of Joey and you at the reception.

Ohh, he's married! Ross is married. I can't—I still can't believe it. (Rachel grabs the picture from Monica)

Honey, sweetie, by the edges.

I mean, y'know I'm just gonna have to accept it (She grabs the rest of the pictures)…

…I mean it's my fault.

Sweetie! Edges! Fingers! Smudgey! Pictures!

Oh my God! (She licks the top picture and hands them back.)

Okay. That's okay. I-I know that you're very upset right now. I know, I know that wasn't about me.


Well, I am drinking lots of cups of coffee because I’m exhausted! Because Joey started snoring!

(proudly) Oh, you should here me.

It’s not something to be proud of, okay? You have to go to a sleep clinic!

Look, I told ya, I’m not going to any clinic! I don’t have a problem, you’re the one with the problem! You should go to a "Quit being a baby and leave me alone" clinic!

They don’t have those.

Yeah, they do! Quit being a baby and leave me alone! There, you’ve just had your first class!


From a bullet!

I know it doesn't make much sense…

Look Chandler, it was instinct! Okay? I just went for it!

So you risked your life, for a sandwich!

I know it sounds crazy, but Chandler this is (Goes and picks up the sandwich) the greatest sandwich in the world!


(yelling to Monica)They're towing your car, they're towing your car!!


(To Joey) Do you even know who Kip is?

Who cares? You're Rachel! (To Chandler) Who's Kip?

rachel was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


She is so amazing! You have no idea.

No idea? Who do you think brought her here?

Joey, she’s so cool. She speaks four languages.

know what guys want!

My beers?! Look you guys, she’s a very nice girl. Okay? We had a good time, but I just—I don’t see it going anywhere.

Yeah, but you always say that.


Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so I’m just gonna go. (She gets up and Rachel looks at her, upset, and Monica just stares.) No! Really? Misery really does love company. All right! (She sits back down.)

rachel was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Someone's left a glass on the coffee table. There's no coaster. It's a cold drink, it's a hot day. Little beads of condensation are inching their way closer and closer to the surface of the wood...


Because you kept talking to him while he was trying to go to the bathroom?!

No! But because he thought I was to faaaaa…. (Chandler emerges, without flushing by the way.) And every time I think about it, it makes me feel as bad as I did in fifth grade! Y’know, I-I really think that you should apologize to Julie.

What? Are you kidding? That was like 16 years ago.

No, I know. But y’know what? It would make me feel better if Lewis apologized to me.

the man you feel in love with!


Hey, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?

Both of us? (points to Chandler and himself)

All right, rock on. (Does the ‘Hang 10’ sign, then hides his face in shame.)


(to Monica) I mean is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex?

Yeah, sure. Well y'know, earlier she was talking about geography.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I don’t know about you guys, but I wanna see the look on Monica’s face when I give her my present, and I’m sure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just, can we put them back?


Okay. (Writes a little more) I am so hot!


Ross, are you okay?

I'm fine! I saw a psychiatrist at work today.


(forcing the door open) Come on, Rachel, come on! Talk to me! Please!!

I can’t talk to you. I can’t even look at you right now!

Just get away from me!

No, it was a mistake! I made a mistake! Okay?

A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in? Her purse?!


I have no idea.

Yeah! I’m just pretending to watch the game so I don’t have to help out with stuff.

I don’t believe you! That is…brilliant! And Monica has no idea?

monica was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


I like them a lot.

That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generally wear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight. (Motions to Ross's buttock.) Maybe there's something in that area.

Oh see, I-I needed a new thing for today and there's this leather store that always smells so good and I thought to myself, "Wow, (To Chandler) I never really owned a good smelling pair of pants before."


Hi, welcome home. [pulls Rachel inside] I need to borrow a hundred bucks.

Why, when did you get out of the game?

I don't know, I lost it all ok. I lost it.

Hey, I've come to terms with it, you have to too.

Ok. Look uhh, Mon I'm, I'm really sorry.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, where are we on the hundred bucks?

I, I don't have it.


I can't find the remote. [Phoebe turns off the TV] Thank you.

So, Scott asked me to come over for lunch today and I did.

And we did.

All right Phoebs, way to go.

So, so how did it happen?

Well, I finally took your advice and asked him what was going on.

And what did he say?

He said that, um, he understands how sex can be like, a very emotional thing for a woman and he was just afraid that I was gonna get all, y'know, like, 'ohh, is he gonna call me the next day' and, y'know, 'where is this going' and, ya know, blah-la-la-la-la. So he said he wanted to hold off until he was prepared to be really serious.


Why is it sick?

Because it’s Richard’s son! It’s like inviting Greek tragedy over for dinner!

Hey, come on, Phoebe, you understand don’t you?


I don’t wanna know what Monica got me. Y’know? I mean, look, I’m sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me, and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not what Christmas is about.


Ross knows about me and Monica.

(To Chandler) I thought you were my best friend, this is my sister! My best friend and my sister! I-I cannot believe this!


Joey, we're not keeping this!

But it's an original Buffay...

Alright, fine. You can keep it. As long as you don't    mind that she's haunted.


The only superpower you have is a slightly heightened sense of smell. (Hands him the jacket and walks away.)

(entering) Hey! Uh, Monica? Chandler? Can I talk to you guys for a second?

All right that’s it, I give up! Whatever you want you can have it! You wanna sing a song? You wanna do a dance? You want your mom stand at the Alter and scream racial slurs? I don’t care!


Phoebe, oh my God! Wh-wh-what are you doing here?

I need to talk to you, it’s pretty urgent. It’s about Monica and Chandler.

Oh my God! Of course, of course. (To the class.) Umm, would you please excuse me for a moment? Umm, do you know each other’s hometowns? Why don’t you… (Motions that they should learn everyone’s hometown.) (To Phoebe) Wh-what’s going on?


Yeah, well, does he look upset? Does he look like he was just told to shove anything?

No, no actually, he's smiling.. and... Oh my God, don't do that!!


(entering) Joey, do you have a minute?

(To Ross) Uh, Rachel's here, so good luck man, let me know how it works out. (He hangs up the phone and strands Ross in the bathroom.)

Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!

Oh well, you're timing couldn't be better. I am putting out fires all over the place.


Joey? What's going on?

I know! It's stuck!!!

(walks him to the kitchen) Easy. Step. How did it get on?


Joey, this is sick, it's disgusting, it's, it's—not really true, is it?

joey was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Monica, could you excuse us for a second? I need to talk to the girl with the flowers.

Okay. Oh but Joey, come over later because I’m going to teach you to make a bird feeder out of just a pine cone and some peanut butter.


I said I’ll do it!

Nobody wants to do it? All right, I’ll do it myself.


(he catches the ball and pauses, staring at Joey in disbelief) Also an island.

joey was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Yeah, he’s really excited about it too, he even recorded show times on his answering machine.

Rach, it’s, it’s ah, it’s not that we don’t want to, really. (quietly) Are we talking models in their underwear?

(He turns around to Chandler looking for approval to go with Rachel, Chandler mouths ‘Come on!’) (turning back to Rachel) Ross, did ask us first, and we set that night aside.

joey addressed rachel, not chandler (ground truth)


You had to do it, didn’t you? You couldn’t just leave it alone.

Four percent. Okay. I tip more than that when there’s a bug in my food.


Is that why you wanted to tie my tie?

There’s this kid in my class who said he’s in love with me.

Ross has a boyfriend.

have a boyfriend. There’s a guy in one of my classes who-who has a crush on me.


All right, there's some pizza at my place, we can all eat with one hand right? Are you with me?


But you two were supposed to be together.

Well, I thought so too, but then she said she’d marry you.

Come on, Ross, that didn’t mean anything! She just had the baby, she was all freaked out about doing it alone, she would have said yes to anybody.

Yeah that’s what she said.


Oh, Ross, relax. It's probably like two dollars for the first contraction, and then fifty cents for each additional contraction.

She's not even here yet.


Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you must end it now!


Then why did you move?!

Because I knew you were lying!

All right, come here! (She gets up and drags Rachel off of the couch by her legs.)

(as she's being dragged) What are you? Monica!! Stop it!! Oh my God! Stop it! (Monica drags her totally onto the floor and on her back.)

I am going… I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm… I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)


And I'm fine never having heard it... (Rachel looks    at Ross in a "why do you say that" manner) Rach, can I... can I see    you for a sec?

rachel was addressed by ross and spoke (ground truth)


Yes, but you ended up having sex with both of them that afternoon.


I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be married again!

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Okay, cancel backup! Cancel backup!

Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here?

Uhh, yes I did but there isn't. Okay, here we go.

Okay, go left. Left! Left! (The bottom of the couch is hitting the railing.)

Okay, y'know what? There is no more left, left!

Oh okay, lift it straight up over your head! Straight up over your head! You can do it! You can do it! (She gets it lifted up and they make the first turn.) Okay. You got it?

Yeah, you got it right? You got it right? You got it?

Any chance you think the couch looks good there?

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Rachel, how did this happen?

rachel was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


(pulling on a robe) Okay, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I-I-I was um, I was taking a nap.

position. Oh God Monica, tell me you were waiting for a guy! Please tell me you were waiting for a guy!

monica was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


See? That’s a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have a camera. (Chandler immediately does The Face.) You’re changing it!

I can’t help it!

All right, all right, all right, all right, you wanna know what I do when I take resume shots?

Borrow money from me?

Okay, first—first of all, you want to make it look spontaneous. I look down (Looks down), look down, keep looking down; then I look up. (Looks up and smiles.) See? All right, now you try. Look down (Chandler looks down), you’re looking down, keep looking down…

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life I’m doing something I actually care about. This is the first time in my life I’m doing something that I’m actually good at. I mean. if you don’t get that...

No, hey, I get that, okay, I get that big time. And I’m happy for ya, but I’m tired of having a relationship with your answering machine! Okay, I don’t know what to do anymore.

Well neither do I!

Is this about Mark?

(shocked) Oh my God.


Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer]

Don't touch the computer. Don't ever touch the computer.

Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.

joey addressed ross, not chandler (ground truth)


Yeah, well, I only have twenty minutes until Ethan, so, y'know.. (He starts to raid the fridge.)


You’re so sweet. (Notices something in the crib.) Oh my God! And you gave the baby Hugsy! (A stuffed penguin wearing a ski jacket, goggles, and hat.)

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh…. That-that-that’s really just to show where the baby would go. Y’know why don’t I hold on to him so that there’s no confusion? (Takes him back, sets him on the chair, and apologizes to him.)

But Joey the baby is going to be crying, it’s going to be loud.

I’m up all night!

What about all the women you want to bring home?


They went in together. So sorry.

Oh my God! Oh my God that’s awful! What did you think of the house?

(walking towards her to hold her and support her) Monica, you understand what we are saying, right?

Yeah, sure... uhm, I'm devastated, obviously... (to the rest) Did you think the neighborhood was homey? (Chandler enters)


I tell people secrets. It makes them like me.

Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get in bed, and stay there.

phoebe was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


Are you serious?! Chandler, we ate an entire cheesecake two days ago and you want more?

Well I’ve forgotten what it tastes like okay?!

It was cheesecake. It was fine. It had a buttery, crumbly, graham cracker crust, with a very rich yet light, cream cheese filling… (Pause) Wow! My whole mouth just filled with saliva!


If you said, "Big lima bean, bubbling up." Would she understand the difference?

(noticing Rachel crawling behind the couch) Rach? What are you doing?

Oh boy, I just can't watch. It's too scary!

It's a diaper commercial.


It's easy, you just walk in on them having sex.

Oh, so they owe me like, three Phoebes.

Oh my god! Look, it's Ross and Rachel. Oh, the plan is working.

phoebe addressed ross, not joey (ground truth)


Relax, Ross. She's not made of ice cream!

Hey look, Phoebe. I, uh, I laid out the states geographically...


Phoebe, I can explain!

You told me you hate massages!

I can’t believe this! How long as this been going on?

Well umm, Alexandra has been…


Noo! I wish! Okay, you ready?

Okay! (She goes and gets her surprise and when she returns with it, Ross stares in shock.) Check it out!

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Oh, you're not gonna tell the whole story about how your parents got divorced again are you?

Oh God, no.

Oh, come on! I wanna hear it! It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without Chandler bumming us out!

joey addressed chandler, not rachel (ground truth)


Okay Ross that’s fine, but can you please stand near my head?

What? Oh yeah. (He moves next to her head.) I’m sorry. I mean I-I think I went a little crazy. I mean I was thinking about myself when I (Wanders towards Rachel’s feet) really—I should have been thinking about you Rach…

Okay. Head Ross! Head Ross! Head Ross!

Right! Right! I just—I want you to know that I’m going to be there through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctor’s appointments, the uh, the Lamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartment—Although we could probably worry about that ‘til after we get married.

Well yeah, I think we should get married.

What, because that’s your answer to everything?

No, because that’s the right thing to do.

Yeah, maybe if you’re in love. But Ross, we are not in love, are we?


Why would I eat my own arm?

Well you wouldn't, but we own the paper, we can print whatever we want.

You know what, Ross? I'm gonna throw in 50 bucks for you.

You don't have to do that, I'll pay for myself. But just the fact that you want me to have fun with you guys - that's so sweet! Come here (they kiss and hug)


Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.

phoebe was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Ross, come sign this birthday card for dad. Rich is gonna be here any minute.

ross was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


(to Rachel) Uh, how long until they announce the numbers, Mommy?

(looks around) I'll take this one too (to Ross) Uh ... Mommy?

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


I'm telling you, she gives the worst massages ever!! Okay, it was like she was torturing me for information. And I wanted to give it up I just—I didn't know what it was!

Chandler, if it really hurts that bad you should just tell her.

Look, for the first time in my life I'm in a real relationship. Okay, I'm not gonna screw that up by y'know, telling the truth.

Whoa, dude, look out! You almost crushed my hat! (He picks a hat up from the floor. It's one of those magician stovepipe hats.)


(taking Ross aside) Have umm, have you thought anymore about you and Rachel?

Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all came in the room.

Yay! It’s so exciting! Wow, you could’ve done that with us there.


I can't believe it. Paolo kissed my mom?

Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and you know how he gets when he's drun..uh... (He has caught sight of Joey scowling at him) I can't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.


Well, let’s just say it’s not the first time you’ve stolen my thunder.

(To Rachel) Hey, here’s a thought.


...Does the knuckle-cracking bother everybody?


You got it.

Joey, what are you doing?

joey was addressed by monica and spoke (ground truth)


I am going… I'm going--Turn it over! (Rachel rolled onto her stomach and Monica rolls her back.) I'm… I am going to get these drops in your eyes. (She is holding Rachel down with both hands and has the eyedropper in her mouth.)


Ahhhh , you brought rats to my birthday party?


No, it’s not. I mean you-you made me your best man and I totally let you down!

Hey, come on, it’s not your fault.

Yeah, it is! You wouldn’t have lost the ring, right? Y’know what, Ross you were right from the start, he (Chandler) should be your best man.

ross was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Joseph Francis Tribbiani are you home yet?!!

Umm, I think he’s still out. What’s wrong?


Well, I-I—there was this guy at the bank that I thought was cute umm, but I don't anymore.

Wow that's uh, juicy. Umm, (checks watch) y'know what though Mon, I actually do have a lot of work to do so if-if—are you sure there's just not anything else?


Wow, so glad I changed. Almost wore my ??? outfit that cant  contain my breasts.


Hey Ross, I'm aware of what I owe.

Ok, well then get some sense. I mean it took you what, 10 years to get that job, who knows how long it's gonna be till you get another.


Hey now you have two. [Chandler looks annoyed] Oh, now you have two.

chandler was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Going to the hospital tonight?

You just asked me.

Okay, maybe it was a trick question. (Plays a few chords) Um, Rachel can we do this now?

phoebe addressed rachel, not monica (ground truth)


What a bad idea!


Okay! (To Rachel) Oh my God, thank you!!


Not yet, no. (Drops his hand and moves back.)


Oh. Oh my God.

Honey, wait. We only did it once. It didn't mean anything to me.

Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry, all right. I never meant for you to find out!

Oh, please, you wanted to get caught. (Waves the receipt)

That is not true!

Oh, so you just sort of happened to leave it in here?

Did it ever occur to you that I might just be that stupid?


Okay, I feel like I’m talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe would you just tell me!

I, but you’re so close! No!

Okay, does it involve something to do with Pete’s computer company?


Ah, now Rach, these ah, these little women.


You’re arranging flowers! (Pointing to the dish on the table.) You got dead flowers! You got a picture, a picture, of a baby dressed like flowers! This is not Joey!!

Hey. Hey look I am still Joey, okay. Flowers they’re just, you know, they’re nice to look at. And that happens to be a picture by a famous artist. Of a famous baby.


This is so exciting! It’s so glamorous! People taking our picture. How do I look?


Well, I’m not really in a sexy mood right now.

How long it took to go back in the water?


Going to the hospital tonight?


Hey, I can handle it! All right?


So uh, Joey and Chanlder, I, I think it's time that you take Dr. Greene over to your place.

Right this is staging.

[as they're walking out, Dr. Greene questioningly gestures at the Happy Birthday sign over the door] This is clearly in the wrong apartment. [they all walk across the hall]

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


military leader. I mean I know I would make General way before any of you guys.

Before or after you were shot by your own troops?


Just let her serve the beef-custard thing?

Yeah, it’ll be like a funny Thanksgiving story!

Joey, God, your apartment is like a hundred degrees!

rachel addressed joey, not ross (ground truth)


Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no, that's OK, I don't need them. I'm going for fours.

Alright, here we go. We've got salmon roulettes and assorted crudites.


(to Ross) Don’t try to sway her. (To Monica) (Softly) I’m your only chance to have a baby. Okay, let’s go.


I just said that so you wouldn't let Ben do it! Look Ross, if anyone should step aside it should be Ben!

Why should Ben step aside? It was his audition in the first place! You-you just tagged along! You're like the uh, tag-a-long dad.

At least I care about his feelings!


Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.

[peeks back out] Ok, now that your coat is safely in the bedr-, [sees that the coast is clear] oh, ok we can come back out in the living room.


Oh, I chose not to hear that.

Look what I got! Look what I got! Look what I got! (She shows Rachel what she bought. She bought a little leather jacket and a little cowboy outfit for the babies.) Can you believe they make these for little people?

Little village people.

Okay, look at this one. This is my favourite. (It’s a little pink and white dress for the girl baby.)


I am pretty wisdomous.

So... what do you say?

Are you kidding? Phoebe, I would be honored. (they hug)

Oh, thank you. I hope... I hope you know how much you mean to me.


Look , I'm sorry, guys, I just don't wanna give them any more ammunition than they already have.

phoebe did not speak next (ground truth)


Yeah, you didn’t expect her to live there with a baby did you?


So you stole that tape from Richard's apartment?

Whoho ho... Listen to the judgement from the porn    star!


Well, how-how-how is that possible? You barely know her!


No, you're right. Well, we'll find something. Let's just get you out of that. Come on.

No, no, no, no, no, no, not out of that, not out of clothes.

Monica, can Phoebe borrow your green dress?

I called him.

Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message. It was breezy! Oh God, what if it wasn't breezy?


: I'm sorry I have friends outside the six of us.


Like only if the queen comes?

Maybe not even then. (Joey walks in)

joey was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Well, Ross does. What... You're - you're ruining the plan! Joey,       you've - you've fixed him up with his perfect woman!

Oh my god, you're right!


Hey, you're not Kip!

(To Joey) Do you even know who Kip is?


Forget it! Okay, I’m not giving up my bachelor pad for some basketball seats!

Have you even had a girl up here?

No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.


Look, Chandler, I told you, never tell anyone about this dog thing. It's like Ross not likin’ ice cream.

chandler was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Skidmark’s still got a way with the ladies.

Hi! I just want to apologize. I’m really sorry I was a baby.

That’s ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once. (Rachel looks at her.) Oh, you mean today.

Yeah. Yeah, and y’know you-you deserve to win. And-and y’know I was thinking about it, if-if you’re Monica’s maid of honor that means I get to be yours.

chandler did not speak next (ground truth)


Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he   knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant. (Joey like   stands at attention with his chest forward and his hands on his sides, looking   up at the ceiling with his lips pouted.) That's not nonchalant!

joey was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


obviously, I just—I misspoke. It's okay.

okay, I mean as long as you know that Chandler and I are also very hot and fiery, just as hot as you! I mean our flame, whew, is on fire!

(entering) Hey Monica, here's your broom back.

You are so cute. (She goes over and kisses him passionately.)


No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can just try it like on a temporary basis.

But Ross, its you and me!

So? Sure! But it-it wouldn’t be anything romantic. And I’m-I’m dating Mona—Damnit Mona! I was supposed to meet her like an hour ago! What is wrong with me?!

I don’t know. Is it crazy?


Come on guys! Suck it up! We're closing in on ten hours! It's gut-check time!

I don't know who made you the boss? All right? We (Ross and him) invented this game!

joey addressed ross, not monica (ground truth)


I know her! I bought homemade soap from her at a Dead show!

Okay, how about, for a guy, Thatcher?


Yeah. Maybe Michael Jordon will dive for the ball and break my jaw with    his knee.


Hey, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?


Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?

monica was addressed by chandler and spoke (ground truth)


Monica, your Sweet Sixteen was like a million years ago.

And yet, here we are doing it again.

Ugh, Monica I don’t want to steal your stupid thunder!


Chip, is Chip Matthews.

The guy who took Rachel to the prom? Why is he calling you?

ross addressed rachel, not monica (ground truth)


Yeah, sorry, the swallowing slowed me down.

Whose little ball of paper is this?!


So what?! That doesn’t give you the right to ditch me!

Hey, you can cancel plans with friends if there is the possibility for sex!


(pulling on a robe) Okay, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I-I-I was um, I was taking a nap.

position. Oh God Monica, tell me you were waiting for a guy! Please tell me you were waiting for a guy!

Yes. Yes, I was. A guy. From work. (Thinks) I'm seeing a guy from work! Ha!


Well, he makes t-shirts for a living, and he thought it would be       appropriate to give me this.

Female body inspector? What size is that?

Now, wait a minute. So, they're gonna name their first child Joey?

joey was addressed by phoebe and spoke (ground truth)


Wait a minute...Joey. Joey you can't ask her out, she's your roommate. It-it'll be way too complicated.


Y'know what, I want to talk to you about this so much, but we should probably do it when we could really get into it, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?

I guess it all started when Rachel got this new job. (he sits down at the table.)

ross addressed rachel, not carol (ground truth)


Let’s do it! Ross?

Um, Monica and I aren’t supposed to play football.

rachel did not speak next (ground truth)


Umm, she Rach, not it, she.

Yeah, I’m not so sure.


Oh my God!

If I have to I'll, I'll do all again , I'll do the 4 o'clock feeding thing, I'll go to the P.T.A. meetings, I'll coach the soccer team.

Yeah, if I have to. Monica, I don't wanna lose you, so if I have to do it all over again, then I will.

You're the most wonderful man. And if you hadn't of said 'if I have to' like seventeen times, then I'd be saying 'okay, let's do it.'


Monica, what are you doing?

It’s not a date, okay. I’m just gonna teach him how to make lasagne for some pot luck dinner he has.

We’re not gonna have sex! Okay, nothing’s changed here. He still doesn’t want children and I still do, so that’s why we’re just gonna be friends.


She's a waitress.

All right, you guys, I kinda gotta clean up now. (They all start to leave.)

Chandler, you're an only child, right? You don't have any of this.

monica addressed chandler, not phoebe (ground truth)


Come on, Joey, I did it and it was fine.

Okay, I guess it doesn’t seem that weird.


I don't know, but when I spoke to her, she said she had already passed the mucus plug.


He probably wants you back because you're right for the job.

Maybe. I-I don't know—Oh God, how could I be so stupid?!

Oh Rachel look, don't say that, I think you just need a hug from Joey. Come on. Come on. (She hugs him and Joey looks out the window.) She's back! Hot girl's back!

rachel was addressed by joey and spoke (ground truth)


Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us! And then he eats chicken and looks at them!

monica was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


That’s Daddy?! But doesn’t it bother you? You’re a waitress.

Yes, it bothers me Ross, but y'know if he was a regular at the coffee house, I’d be serving him sneezers.

You really serve people sneezers?


(returning) Hey you guys, Hums While He Pees just asked me out!


(to Janice) Okay. (to Joey) Joey, trade lives with me!


What is your job?

Staying out of the way.


(sarcastically shocked) Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were in Ross’s situation?


Oh my God! Joey!

Why?! Why can’t she marry me?!


Yeah, well I don’t think it really counts if you have to read them off the back of your hand after you fall asleep on the couch.

So-so, you missed a message from who? Chandler or your mom? Or Chandler? Or your mom?

rachel addressed chandler, not monica (ground truth)


(waving) Very funny Ross! Very life-like and funny. Okay. (Notices that a woman is waving back.) Oh no-no-no, I wasn't waving at you lady. (She just stares at him.) (Joey sees how beautiful she is.) Whoa, maybe I was! Hey, Monica, this totally hot girl in Ross's building is flirting with me.

Get in there man! Flirt back, mix it up!

Yeah, I-I-I'm down with that. (He turns back to the woman.) Okay, here goes. (Thinks.) How (Holds up his hand like an Indian) you (Points at her) a-doin'? (Does a little twisting motion with both hands and ends up pointing at her, he then winks. She smiles and waves again.) (To Monica) It worked! She's waving me over. (Towards the woman.) Okay, I-I-I'll be right over. Let's see, she's on the third floor…


Yeah! I wrote Emma a song.

Oh, yeah! How was I supposed to know?

Joey, it's a birthday party.

Yeah, but for a one-year-old. What's the point... the other day she laughed    for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as    a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow and the cow says "El-moo"!    (Joey starts laughing) Yeah... that's a funny cup!


It’s hard for some people!


It did enter my mind! But then something happened that made it, shoot right out.

Y'know what Chandler, you got yourself into those cuffs, you get yourself out of them.

No-no-no-no-no-no-no!! I can’t get myself right out of them! You must have me confused with the Amazing Chandler!! Come on, you have to unlock me, she could be gone for hours, and I’m cold, and (Stops and looks up the skirt on a statue behind Joanna’s desk.)


Wait a minute, look.

It's an empty apartment.

Honey, come on, I have to be at work in like ten minutes (Ross starts kissing her neck) Oh, all right, well it's not like I'm employee of the year or anything. (they fall onto the couch)

ross was addressed by rachel and spoke (ground truth)


Oh no, yeah no, that part’s great!

monica did not speak next (ground truth)


Monica, I'm tellin' you, this guy is perfect for you.

Forget it. Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet.

Come on. This guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's... brother. He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job. Me, I go on three auditions a month and call myself an actor, but Bob is...

(looking out window) Oh, god help us.

Ugly Naked Guy's laying kitchen tile. Eww!

Eww! Look, I'm asking a favor here. If I do this for her brother, maybe Angela will come back to me.

What's going on here? You go out with tons of girls.

(proud) I know, but, I made a huge mistake. I never should have broken up with her. Will you help me? Please?